Shameless Sexual Exploitation Weekend: And The Winners Are
I sit here in China, where supposedly the police is glued with one ear to my door and has directional microphones beamed at my windows. Looking and listening to America, I can only shake my head. No authorities needed. We are self-policing. Where did the great times of the 70’s and 80’s go? Where is true freedom of speech hiding? Pretty much nothing can be said and done anymore for fear of insulting someone, somewhere, somehow. The other day, we showed two car ads, made for network TV, and all hell broke loose. “Too racy!” “I will get in trouble with HR when I watch TTAC during work!” “Sexist!”
According to my mother, bless her heart, I fancied boobies hours after I was born. Somehow, I never gave up the affliction. I’m coming out of the closet: Yes, I like sex. Having lived and worked in the movie and advertising scene for most of my life, I am used to a, what do they call it now, “diverse lifestyle.” Most of my art directors were gay. The head of our company went both ways, he had twice the fun. I’m as straight as can be, but my wife and I are regular visitors at the Folsom Street Fair in Berlin. Shame on you if you know what it is.
So when I did read the kvetching about two harmless commercials, I said to myself: “Fornicate it.” And I called for entries for the Shameless Sexual Exploitation Weekend: (Possibly) NSFW. Here are the results.
Twotone, my man, had three great entries. First, the classic “Not in this weather” Mercedes commercial. Knowing Mercedes, this took guts. I remember the times when they thought any advertising at all was despicable:
Then a Mini Cooper commercial that reminded me of my youth, in more ways than one:
And finally a Hyundai commercial, that shamelessly exploited cougars AND gays – before cougars even were on the radar:
psarhjinian redefined “racy” with this one:
With the next entry, JJ dispelled the myth that women don’t like to look at pictures of pretty women. (Who do you think the lingerie ads are targeted at anyway? At cross dressers?)
He followed it up with one my mother would have liked:
With this fine piece of print, dada showed that BMW can – on occasion – get beyond the stick-in-the-muds they usually are when it comes to advertising:
Speaking of Cougars, npbheights had some nice Mercury Cougar ads. Already a tad tame in comparison.
Did I say the guys at BMW usually are stick-in-the-muds? Not according to this commercial, brought to us by Kevin Jaeger:
iNeon wanted to see “some dick,” but sadly, nobody provided any. Probably for a lack of material. (There will be some at the end.)
And who gets the prize for the most politically incorrect pick?
Zombo! Fellatio AND vertically challenged people! That took guts.
Bertel Schmitt comes back to journalism after taking a 35 year break in advertising and marketing. He ran and owned advertising agencies in Duesseldorf, Germany, and New York City. Volkswagen A.G. was Bertel's most important corporate account. Schmitt's advertising and marketing career touched many corners of the industry with a special focus on automotive products and services. Since 2004, he lives in Japan and China with his wife <a href="http://www.tomokoandbertel.com"> Tomoko </a>. Bertel Schmitt is a founding board member of the <a href="http://www.offshoresuperseries.com"> Offshore Super Series </a>, an American offshore powerboat racing organization. He is co-owner of the racing team Typhoon.
More by Bertel Schmitt
Comments
Join the conversation
I am aware I am merely a carrier and disseminator of RNA/DNA and once I have fulfilled that role I should crawl off and cease existing to allow the next carrier to repeat the performance. Free up the shanty for the next occupant and leave room at the dumpster for the next herd member grazing for sustenance. I am still unable to comprehend the hows and whys and ins and outs of HOW that curvy helix "instructs" various chemicals to utilize elements and various "building blocks" to construct a complete functioning self-replicating human body. Currently listening to the Webcast of the Ron Ananian "Car Doctor" call-in show. Interesting, informative. http://www.ronananian.com/ Aired by various Webcasting capable radio stations at various times and days. I listen to the Sunday AM Webcast via http://www.wntk.com/index.php Webcasting is cool, akin to a '69 2-door Dodge Dart or a 70-72 Plymouth Duster or a bunch of other make/model cars but I trend towards Moparness but reality shouts out to ensure my conveyance allows one to dwell within its confines while maintaining a low profile to fend off the jack-booted-thugs defending the status quo demanded and enforced by the ruling elites. However, I still recognize the tie-side bikini as one of the great inventions of humanity and to be rejoiced over and its use to be encouraged whenever possible. Film at eleven.
If we are voting, I think the blond (in the front seat) in the MINI commercial is the hottest.