Nissan Horrifies Automotive Media With Lack Of Juke-R Long-Term Testers

Derek Kreindler
by Derek Kreindler

Nissan sent a blow to the automotive press today, with the announcement that none of the upcoming limited production Juke-R crossovers would be allocated for long-term testing.

Tom Barnard of Nissan GB made a brief announcement via Twitter stating

“Just announced that we’re going to put the Juke R into limited production. No, we won’t be doing long termers. Or company cars.”

The announcement was felt across the automotive media industry, with journalists issuing last-ditch attempts at persuading Nissan to lend them a Juke-R. Some even resorted to effusive, sycophantic praise in a desperate attempt to establish enthusiast credibility by professing undying love for the pointless engineering exercise.

An anonymous observer noted that producing the Juke-R isn’t particularly “courageous”, since it counts as a mere marketing exercise using existing components to create a halo vehicle. The same observer also noted the vitriolic hate for the car’s design and packaging when it first debuted in 2010, despite the fact that it’s a great vehicle. Auto journalists have strangely suspended their irrational group-think hatred of crossovers when reporting on the Juke-R, despite the fact that it looks sillier than the standard Juke and may in fact be more of a rolling nerd magnet than Nissan’s GT-R sports coupe.

With files from Frank Bacon

Derek Kreindler
Derek Kreindler

More by Derek Kreindler

Join the conversation
4 of 12 comments
  • Ryoku75 Ryoku75 on May 03, 2012

    I'm horrified that they're going to even make these things.

  • Michaelhagerty Michaelhagerty on May 03, 2012

    Now, to stick the knife in C/D, MT, R&T, Automobile, AW, et al, Consumer Reports should buy one at sticker.

  • Niky Niky on May 04, 2012

    I'd buy one. I don't get all the hate over the styling. Sure, it looks like the bastard love-child of the Frog Prince and Quasimodo, but it does have its charms. Who cares about long-term testing? The only appropriate venue for testing would be a one-hour flog on the racetrack and that's it. Anything longer than a day in something so irrelevant to the mass market is pointless... "After our one week test, we can safely say that the cupholders work, the fuel economy is abysmal and it's not bad for picking up chicks." Right.

  • Hgrunt Hgrunt on May 04, 2012

    Juke R vs G65 AMG: Stupid SUV Shootout of the Century!