Freaky Friday: Volt Owner Angry About Lack of Driveway; Google Street View Pants Mishap

The long weekend is almost here, so let’s draw a deep breath and look at the lighter side of the news.

The first comes by way of Toronto, the city whose untouchable values and intrinsic right-thinking nature are seen by residents as a helpful beacon to the unwashed masses in other (less important) Canadian locales.

And in this city, people who bought an electric vehicle but don’t own a garage or driveway have their complaints aired in the Toronto Star.

The protagonist in this story, Todd Anderson, wants to help the environment, so he bought a 2016 Chevrolet Volt. Not a bad choice — decent electric range for around-town jaunts and a gas generator for out-of-town trips. Another bonus: $12,500 provided by Ontario taxpayers to help him foot the bill. The problem is, he has nowhere to charge it, and this is the city’s fault.

Anderson says he has to run an extension cord to his outdoor parking spot (kitty corner to his home) in order to juice up the Volt. He has installed a recharging station on his front lawn, but the street in front of his house is a no parking zone. If he parks there (and he does), Anderson has to run a cord across the sidewalk, potentially tripping people, while parking tickets collect under his wiper blades.

Some might say that he could have avoided the situation by not purchasing a vehicle that requires a driveway. Or, he could wait until his living accommodations allow him to easily use such a vehicle. Anderson doesn’t see it that way. The city, he says, should make it possible for residents to charge their cars on the street.

“I don’t think someone who drives a gas car would put up with not being able to use a gas station on a daily basis,” he told the Star. Thing is, there are public charging stations in Toronto, but they’re not in front of homes. Much like gas stations. (But far fewer, we realize. The city and province are working on that. Please don’t write angry letters...)

On the less irritating side of the news, a Houston bar manager’s soaking wet crotch and right leg has been immortalized in the most modern of ways thanks to a Google Street View vehicle.

According to Houstonia (via Gizmodo), Joshua Justice of the city’s Flying Saucer Draught Emporium accidentally poured half of a keg of suds on his lower extremities, so he decided to walk outside to a very public place to dry off. Who wouldn’t? (Besides the hoards of people who would anxiously hide in shame or borrow an apron from the kitchen.)

As he stood on the corner of the downtown street, with lager or IPA or God knows what soaking his brown pantleg from berries to cuff, Google’s mapping vehicle drove by and silently said say cheese.

The drive-by didn’t go unnoticed. He took to Facebook that night, posting, “Look for me on Street View soon. I’ll be the guy that looks like he pissed himself.”

Yes, it does look that way. However, Justice struck a defiant pose — arms crossed, head held high, staring down the judging camera vehicle. So what, he seems to be saying, maybe I like my pants this way.

Because of Google’s face-blurring tool, we can’t see the emotions coursing through his mind like ale through corduroy. We imagine that his expression would make this image twice as funny.

[Image: Google Street View]