The New Ferrari California is Ugly

Justin Berkowitz
by Justin Berkowitz

How do I put this delicately? The new Ferrari California looks like a Chevrolet Corvette crossed with a BMW Z4 tuned by Brabus. The front end is the best angle, but it's still busier than Sunday morning at a college health clinic. The Fezza's side and back, however, are a goddamn mess. The gills, no doubt an homage to the properly stunning 1957 Ferrari 250 GT California, look completely out of place on this car. The bizarre lines on the side are overdone. The back end is a disaster. Quad stacked pipes? Black plastic trim? It's more TVR or Lorinser than Ferrari. Folding hardtop? On a Mercedes-Benz SL65 AMG, sure. A Ferrari with a folding hardtop is like a nuclear-powered toaster. Can you imagine the embarrassment at Wolfgang Puck's Spago in Beverly Hills when that thing gets stuck in full vertical? While the engine sounds phenomenal, the interior probably smells like Adriana Lima's cleavage and it's sure to handle with all the visceral panache that we expect from Ferrari's legendary death cars, it's not enough to save the California from pastiche-land. Then again, with guaranteed waiting lists and eBay adjustments, the men from Maranello will, once again, put their customers hands in the air like they just don't care. But I do.

Justin Berkowitz
Justin Berkowitz

Immensely bored law student. I've also got 3 dogs.

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