QOTD: I Am Become Death, Destroyer of Cars?

Steph Willems
by Steph Willems

We’re going to get quite selfish and authoritarian today, because we all harbor those feelings and it’s good to let them out from time to time. Safely.

You’re not a CEO in this hypothetical circumstance. You’re not an auto executive or designer or fabulously wealthy buyer with a garage capable of housing the USS Iwo Jima, either. No, you’re the same person you were when you laid your head down last night. Just more powerful. Omnipotent. You carry the world in your hands, and we all cower at your feet.

And you have a job to do.

That job is to kill off an automaker simply because its existence annoys the living shit out of you. That’s all. Yes, it’s an entirely selfish and morally reprehensible exercise, but you’ve been handed the power to snap your fingers and never be annoyed by hearing about a certain company’s products (or troubles, or fans) ever again, and you’d best not waste your chance.

Imagine getting the opportunity to rid the world of Billy Joel’s music. Well, this is the automotive equivalent.

It’s possible the answers to this question could prove quite illuminating, as it blends the psychological with the physical. With some automakers, the products are something you’ve decided will never interest you, but you can’t bring yourself to feel particularly vengeful against the company itself. It tries its best, some people like them, and so be it. It’s quite a different story when you combine those products, which you are definitely not planning on taking home this year (or indeed in your lifetime), and combine it with an annoying periphery. Fandom, drama, obnoxious marketing, activism — the list goes on and on.

You probably know what company I’m thinking of.

But hey, maybe you’ve got another one in mind. Let’s hear it, as well as the reasoning for it. Hopefully not everyone lands on the same page.

[Image: Century 21]

Steph Willems
Steph Willems

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  • Analoggrotto I don't see a red car here, how blazing stupid are you people?
  • Redapple2 Love the wheels
  • Redapple2 Good luck to them. They used to make great cars. 510. 240Z, Sentra SE-R. Maxima. Frontier.
  • Joe65688619 Under Ghosn they went through the same short-term bottom-line thinking that GM did in the 80s/90s, and they have not recovered say, to their heyday in the 50s and 60s in terms of market share and innovation. Poor design decisions (a CVT in their front-wheel drive "4-Door Sports Car", model overlap in a poorly performing segment (they never needed the Altima AND the Maxima...what they needed was one vehicle with different drivetrain, including hybrid, to compete with the Accord/Camry, and decontenting their vehicles: My 2012 QX56 (I know, not a Nissan, but the same holds for the Armada) had power rear windows in the cargo area that could vent, a glass hatch on the back door that could be opened separate from the whole liftgate (in such a tall vehicle, kinda essential if you have it in a garage and want to load the trunk without having to open the garage door to make room for the lift gate), a nice driver's side folding armrest, and a few other quality-of-life details absent from my 2018 QX80. In a competitive market this attention to detai is can be the differentiator that sell cars. Now they are caught in the middle of the market, competing more with Hyundai and Kia and selling discounted vehicles near the same price points, but losing money on them. They invested also invested a lot in niche platforms. The Leaf was one of the first full EVs, but never really evolved. They misjudged the market - luxury EVs are selling, small budget models not so much. Variable compression engines offering little in terms of real-world power or tech, let a lot of complexity that is leading to higher failure rates. Aside from the Z and GT-R (low volume models), not much forced induction (whether your a fan or not, look at what Honda did with the CR-V and Acura RDX - same chassis, slap a turbo on it, make it nicer inside, and now you can sell it as a semi-premium brand with higher markup). That said, I do believe they retain the technical and engineering capability to do far better. About time management realized they need to make smarter investments and understand their markets better.
  • Kwik_Shift_Pro4X Off-road fluff on vehicles that should not be off road needs to die.
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