By on June 27, 2011

Since cementing its premium-retro-cutesy positioning in the marketplace, MINI’s been leveraging its two platforms into a niche-munching binge. Soon the MINI lineup will range from cozy Coupe to two-door “Sport Activity Vehicle,” and will include two convertibles, multiple versions of the two-door hatche, two-and-a-half-door hatch, and four door SUV. So what’s missing? A Moke? A Delivery van? What about a re-interpretation of the old Mini Pick Up? You and I may feel like the MINI brand  already has plenty of niche offerings, thanks, but here is indisputable proof (found in a supermarket parking lot) that the market thinks MINI hasn’t chased enough niches. Carry on then, lads…

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16 Comments on “What’s Wrong With This Picture: MINI’s Untouched Niche Edition...”

  • avatar

    Must be one of these, sans the can:

  • avatar

    This reminds me in 1972 when one of our local “house boys” (yes, they were known as that) in our barracks when on Okinawa when I was in the USAF wanted me to buy him a blank 8-track tape cartridge from the BX. I said of course, so we went to his vehicle, which was a kei pickup truck – a Datsun, I believe. I could hardly get in the thing, and when I did, my knees were up against the dash. I’m 5’10” and at the time weighed about 180. (I’m 190 now). The Okinawan was laughing his head off at me trying to squeeze in that car! The Mini surely has more room in the cab than that!

    Another time he wanted me to buy him some, ahem “penis butter”. I had to really scratch my head at that one for several minutes, trying to figure out his broken english! He finally blurted out “SKIPPY”! Only then did I realize he was trying to say “peanut butter”. That resulted in lots of laughter, too. Some really good times over there, not to mention three-wheeled vehicles, both cars and trucks.

    Are we slowly going back to that trend?

    • 0 avatar
      SVX pearlie

      If Obama and the morons at CARB have their way, yes.

      • 0 avatar

        There’s our common ground. Hopefully the next administration will use the commerce clause as it was intended, and shut down CARB.

      • 0 avatar

        I’ll be so sad if CARB drives the giant, unnecessary V8 body-on-frame pickup truck out of existence and forces manufacturers to build small, practical, fuel-efficient pickup trucks. Or not.
        CJ, I thought you guys were all about states rights and not abusing the power of the federal government and all that jazz? But not when it conflicts with some other priority, I guess.

      • 0 avatar

        CARB is a violation of the commerce clause, which is written in the Constitution. I’m a big fan of Constitutional states rights, and Constitutional limitations on the branches of the federal government. Consistency is easy when you’re not trying to create a web of lies to justify unlimited government. The fact that the commerce clause procludes the creation of an organization like CARB just shows that the framers were serious men. That it exists anyway shows that we’ve lacked politicians of integrity since.

  • avatar

    Waht’s wrong with that picture? Everyone knows you convert a Clubman if you want a serious pickup.

    • 0 avatar

      I think RedBull had all those built before the Clubman was introduced. The purpose of these cars was to attract attention, not to be useful pickup trucks. This is what they looked like when their original owners had them:

  • avatar

    I can’t help but note the humorous juxtaposition when parked next to an F250 either.

  • avatar

    One wonders why Red Bull decided to go with these rather than something more practical. I guess they were attention-getting vehicles back in the day, but a new Mini would barely generate a glance now. Do they count as a zombie brand yet?

    • 0 avatar

      A Mini Cooper with a giant RedBull can sticking out of the top and driven by two pretty young women in cute uniforms who hand out free RedBull gets plenty of attention. They were a common sight in my beach community for years, and locals were Pavlovianly conditioned to line up at the curb whenever they stopped.

  • avatar

    It carries the proverbial 4 by 8 [Inch] sheet of plywood, and a bag of nails from Home Depot.

    What’s not to like?

  • avatar
    Jonathan H.

    A few weeks ago my best friend called me up and said his neighbor, an elderly German woman, just bought two Minis at auction and needed us to drive them the hundred miles back to her house. He had no details on the cars so my mind immediately jumped to dreams of Italian Job-style fun once we picked them up. Skipping the interstates and zipping down the twisty back roads. His girlfriend gave us a ride to pick up the cars and that’s when we came face to face with two Mini Coopers nearly identical to the one pictured. The only real difference was the molded portion that cradled the can was still in place and there were two hatches on the rear deck lid that allowed access to the coolers the previously stored many cans of Red Bull. Both cars were ragged out heaps that are currently having piles of money spent on them to get them in decent condition. One required a tranny rebuild. Needless to say we parked our butts in the far right lane of the interstate praying that they held together long enough to get us home. My dreams of being Marky Mark for a day were dashed.

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