Piston Slap: Need a "Hans and Franz" ABS Workout?

Sajeev Mehta
by Sajeev Mehta

Craig writes:

Sajeev,

Some time ago I purchased a 1995 (E36) BMW M3 as a project car. Mostly I have limited myself to bringing the maintenance up to date. I have a more than averagely equipped workshop and can find my way around a car pretty well (I have even built my own Brunton SuperStalker) One problem that has eluded me from day 1 is an intermittent ABS light.

Should I just ditch the ABS forever or is there a way to trouble shoot these things without Hans and Franz at the stealership taking me for a ride?

Sajeev answers:

I tend to like ABS, especially for a car that’s so race course worthy. The E36 M3 is just a fantastic car in so many ways. That said, I was disappointed when I googled Brunton SuperStalker and realized it wasn’t a murdered out full-size van with a suped up turbo diesel motor, air-ride suspension and big ass wheels.

A non-van referred to as a SuperStalker? That’s almost criminal!

Right. So, about the diagnosis, you have two options. The first is spending a lot of time on the BMW forums, learning how to diagnose this vintage system and possibly finding a common problem with a somewhat easy to fix solution. Not really your cup of tea? Then find an independent mechanic that specializes in BMWs and get 1-2 hours of their diagnosis instead. It will be worth it.

The dealership isn’t the best move here, usually. Cars that are “E36-old” need a shop that is tailor-made to their unique needs. Many (insert make here) dealerships know a good vintage (insert the same make here) shop and will recommend them to anyone. Yes, I’ve seen it happen! Most importantly, Hans and Franz will always encourage you to work your ABS.

“Hear me now, and believe me later: WORK YOUR E36 ABS! ARE YOU A GIRLY MAN?”

Send your queries to sajeev@thetruthaboutcars.com. Spare no details and ask for a speedy resolution if you’re in a hurry.

Sajeev Mehta
Sajeev Mehta

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  • Rpn453 Rpn453 on Jul 30, 2012

    Broken wiring was the problem with the ABS system I once repaired. I'd do a good visual inspection and if you're into letting others touch your car you could maybe even have a specialty shop look at it. If the problem is then obvious, fix it. If not, I'd leave it. I don't think I'd ever flat-spot a set of tires badly enough to justify spending a bunch of time and money to get it working.

  • SN123 SN123 on Aug 20, 2012

    If it's looking expensive in relation to how else that money could be spent on getting the car sorted, why not delete ABS and pull the bulb? From what I've read it seems ABS is over-rated as a safety feature. I've driven low-spec Jap cars with ABS where once it activated, braking was weaker than if you could just use the brakes yourself. Although BMW apparently have their brakes pretty sorted. From the Dog and Lemon guide on ABS: “Although ABS performs well on the test track, there is no evidence [that it] made significant reductions in the number of on-the-road crashes. A 1994 Highway Loss Data Institute (HLDI) study and a subsequent 1995 study compared insurance claims for groups of otherwise identical cars with and without ABS, found no differences in the overall frequency or cost of crashes...” Because ABS should make the most difference on wet and slippery roads, researchers also studied insurance claims experience in 29 northern American states during winter months. Even there they found no difference in the frequency of insurance claims for vehicles with and without anti-lock brakes. A 1997 Institute study and a 2001 update reported no difference in the overall fatal crash involvement of cars with and without ABS. Federal studies of ABS are consistent with Institute and HLDI findings. According to one federal report, ‘the overall, net effect of antilock brakes’ on both police-reported crashes and fatal crashes ‘was close to zero’. No one knows for sure why the test performance of ABS has not translated into a significant reduction in real-world crashes. A possible reason is that the average motorist rarely experiences total loss of vehicle control, which antilocks are designed to prevent. There is also evidence that many car owners do not know how to use antilock brakes effectively. An Institute survey of drivers with ABS-equipped cars found that more than 50 percent in North Carolina and 40 percent in Wisconsin incorrectly thought they should pump the brakes. Another possibility is that some motorists may drive less cautiously because they believe anti-lock brakes allow them to brake better. One possible reason for the failure of ABS to lower the road toll is that it affects the brakes only, leaving a human to make a number of critical (and sometimes wrong) decisions. Electronic Stability Control can help with this problem.

  • Redapple2 Love the wheels
  • Redapple2 Good luck to them. They used to make great cars. 510. 240Z, Sentra SE-R. Maxima. Frontier.
  • Joe65688619 Under Ghosn they went through the same short-term bottom-line thinking that GM did in the 80s/90s, and they have not recovered say, to their heyday in the 50s and 60s in terms of market share and innovation. Poor design decisions (a CVT in their front-wheel drive "4-Door Sports Car", model overlap in a poorly performing segment (they never needed the Altima AND the Maxima...what they needed was one vehicle with different drivetrain, including hybrid, to compete with the Accord/Camry, and decontenting their vehicles: My 2012 QX56 (I know, not a Nissan, but the same holds for the Armada) had power rear windows in the cargo area that could vent, a glass hatch on the back door that could be opened separate from the whole liftgate (in such a tall vehicle, kinda essential if you have it in a garage and want to load the trunk without having to open the garage door to make room for the lift gate), a nice driver's side folding armrest, and a few other quality-of-life details absent from my 2018 QX80. In a competitive market this attention to detai is can be the differentiator that sell cars. Now they are caught in the middle of the market, competing more with Hyundai and Kia and selling discounted vehicles near the same price points, but losing money on them. They invested also invested a lot in niche platforms. The Leaf was one of the first full EVs, but never really evolved. They misjudged the market - luxury EVs are selling, small budget models not so much. Variable compression engines offering little in terms of real-world power or tech, let a lot of complexity that is leading to higher failure rates. Aside from the Z and GT-R (low volume models), not much forced induction (whether your a fan or not, look at what Honda did with the CR-V and Acura RDX - same chassis, slap a turbo on it, make it nicer inside, and now you can sell it as a semi-premium brand with higher markup). That said, I do believe they retain the technical and engineering capability to do far better. About time management realized they need to make smarter investments and understand their markets better.
  • Kwik_Shift_Pro4X Off-road fluff on vehicles that should not be off road needs to die.
  • Kwik_Shift_Pro4X Saw this posted on social media; “Just bought a 2023 Tundra with the 14" screen. Let my son borrow it for the afternoon, he connected his phone to listen to his iTunes.The next day my insurance company raised my rates and added my son to my policy. The email said that a private company showed that my son drove the vehicle. He already had his own vehicle that he was insuring.My insurance company demanded he give all his insurance info and some private info for proof. He declined for privacy reasons and my insurance cancelled my policy.These new vehicles with their tech are on condition that we give up our privacy to enter their world. It's not worth it people.”
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