And the Real Winner Is…

by Murilee Martin

Published: October 24th, 2011

It is not possible for a Chrysler minivan to finish in the top third of a weekend-long race on the car-killing turns and hils of Infineon Raceway, which is proof that this weekend’s race never happened. That means that the performance of the Team Soccer Moms’ Caravan must have been the product of mass hallucination.

This factory-5-speed-equipped Dodge family hauler finished ahead of more than 100 competitors, while remaining nearly black-flag- and breakdown-free all weekend.

The Soccer Moms battled a Colt, a GLC, a Fire Arrow, and an Escort wagon for IOE honors. In the end, even a Fire Arrow couldn’t match the sheer inappropriateness of a K-car-based minivan as a race car. Congratulations, Soccer Moms!

#24HoursOfLeMons #24HoursOfLeMonsInfineon #Chrysler #DodgeCaravan #IndexOfEffluency #Minivan #SkankawayAnti-Toe-Fungal500

Murilee Martin

Murilee Martin is the pen name of Phil Greden, a writer who has lived in Minnesota, California, Georgia and (now) Colorado. He has toiled at copywriting, technical writing, junkmail writing, fiction writing and now automotive writing. He has owned many terrible vehicles and some good ones. He spends a great deal of time in self-service junkyards. These days, he writes for publications including Autoweek, Autoblog, Hagerty, The Truth About Cars and Capital One.

More by Murilee Martin

Comments

Join the conversation

3 of 27 comments

Cruz53a on Oct 25, 2011

we had a blast this weekend. the van handled great and loved turn 6 where we could make most of our passes, just wish we had more HP to keep most of those passes.

Like Reply
- Victell on Oct 26, 2011
  
  Congrats on your great run. Running a van is definitely inspired. Can you tell us more about it? What did you do to the body? Did you keep the glass or go lexan? How did you get it to handle well?? Also, why didnt you do more mods to get the HP up? I heard these engines are pretty strong and relatevely easy to make more power. I think I want one of these vans now...
  
  Like
Cruz53a on Oct 27, 2011

the van has been gutted of all unnecessary weight, i mean everything. we removed wires and connectors from the harness, thats how crazy we got with it. the doors are nothing but a thin piece of sheetmetal, the glass has been replaced with lexan, the suspension is put together using dodge spirit struts with cut van springs and an axle flip with repositioned stock shocks at the rear. the stock spring rates work well with the lightened van. from about 3350lbs stock to about 2650lbs race ready. the engine is bone stock with the exception of removing the balance shafts. we feel that turning laps is more important than stressing the engine with mods, crazy but it works. i think the most important part of the operation is the respect our drivers have for each other, the van and the competition.

Like Reply

Recent Comments

Zipper69 A Mini should have 2 doors and 4 cylinders and tires the size of dinner plates.All else is puffery.
Theflyersfan Just in time for the weekend!!! Usual suspects A: All EVs are evil golf carts, spewing nothing but virtue signaling about saving the earth, all the while hacking the limbs off of small kids in Africa, money losing pits of despair that no buyer would ever need and anyone that buys one is a raging moron with no brains and the automakers who make them want to go bankrupt.(Source: all of the comments on every EV article here posted over the years)Usual suspects B: All EVs are powered by unicorns and lollypops with no pollution, drive like dreams, all drivers don't mind stopping for hours on end, eating trays of fast food at every rest stop waiting for charges, save the world by using no gas and batteries are friendly to everyone, bugs included. Everyone should torch their ICE cars now and buy a Tesla or Bolt post haste.(Source: all of the comments on every EV article here posted over the years)Or those in the middle: Maybe one of these days, when the charging infrastructure is better, or there are more options that don't cost as much, one will be considered as part of a rational decision based on driving needs, purchasing costs environmental impact, total cost of ownership, and ease of charging.(Source: many on this site who don't jump on TTAC the split second an EV article appears and lives to trash everyone who is a fan of EVs.)
The Oracle Some commenters have since passed away when this series got started.
The Oracle Honda is generally conservative yet persistent, this will work in one form or fashion.
Theflyersfan I love this car. I want this car. No digital crap, takes skill to drive, beat it up, keep on going.However, I just looked up the cost of transmission replacement:$16,999 before labor. That's the price for an OEM Mitsubishi SST. Wow. It's obvious from reading everything the seller has done, he has put a lot of time, energy, and love into this car, but it's understandable that $17,000 before labor, tax, and fees is a bridge too far. And no one wants to see this car end up in a junkyard. The last excellent Mitsubishi before telling Subaru that they give up. And the rear facing car seat in the back - it's not every day you see that in an Evo! Get the kid to daycare in record time! Comments are reading that the price is best offer. It's been a while since Tim put something up that had me really thinking about it, even something over 1,000 miles away. But I've loved the Evo for a long time... And if you're going to scratch out the front plate image, you might want to do the rear one as well!