Our West Coast Bureau Chief is one persistent son of a bitch. Every day I get emails or phone calls from Jonny Lieberman asking me to pimp him a ride, preferably a Porsche Turbo or Audi RS4. Since we've cut a deal with The Aston Lawrence Group re: sourcing press cars for our troops, he's… still on my case. But I respect that. Cars are my drug too. If I wasn't so busy answering JL's emails and other equally vital administrative tasks, I'd be sending myself emails asking why I haven't found a ride for… me. Anyway, Jonny rang me up to discuss his MX-5 review, his forthcoming F150 King Ranch review and Frank's ad article. At least it kept him away from his computer for 10 minutes… 

No question, the Ford Mustang is a galloping success. Both the base and GT models are a runaway success, contributing significant revenue to their corporate parent. And now legendary racer, sports car constructor and chili magnate Carroll Shelby is adding some hot tamales to the feed bag. The Shelby Cobra GT500 goes on sale any second now, saddled with a supercharged 5.4-liter V8 good for 500hp. Although there’s little doubt that Shelby’s performance package will be a well-engineered addition to the core car’s strengths, it’s still a case of too much too late.

Why is it so hard for carmakers to get the little things right? Most of these guys have been building cars for over a century. Yet they put the pedals in the wrong place, or give their machine numb steering, or equip the interior with less style than a Day’s Inn. One reason: compromise. Manufacturer X could offer you perfect pedal placement, or share pedals between five models and save you a grand. Another case in point, who doesn’t want a convertible? Put another way, who the Hell wants a convertible? With the MX-5 Miata Power Hartop, Mazda has removed compromise from that particular equation.

In a recent Saab TV ad, a fighter jet transmogrifies into a 9-7X. The Transformers shtick tries to convince truck buyers that Saab’s SUV was “born from jets.” There’s one small problem: the 9-7X was born from a Chevrolet. The model’s built in Moraine, Ohio next to (and out of) Trailblazers. And get this. During the transformation the engine rolls down into the engine compartment sideways. Couldn’t the geniuses who made this commercial bother to remember that the Trailblaz… uh… 9-7X has a “north-south” engine, not an “east-west” one like current Saabs? And so car companies continue their assault on pistonheads’ intelligence.

The Galway-Cavendish Forest Rally is a challenging mix of changing elevations, sweeping curves, tight turns and blind drops that runs through nine clicks of thick forest. Chrysler Canada figured it was the ideal spot for a car journalist to test the mettle of their ‘07 Dodge Caliber AWD R/T. So there I was, ferrying the club president and organizer from one end of the road to the other, wondering if Dodge had the right ammunition for the sales campaign ahead.

My Space's success has not gone unnoticed. No, I'm not talking about pedophiles. I'm referring to the Lords and Lordettes of the "new media," who are busy trying to make your space their space so they can make advertisers' money into their money. It didn't take a great leap of imagination for entrepreneurial e-pistonheads to imagine a My Space for cars, where owners throw down pics and stats of their wheels to engage in the guilty pleasures of automotive exhibitionism. Boompa.com is one of the more interesting examples of this new genre, combining the usual "rate-a-ride" meters with some genuinely useful features with relatively clean (if cartoonish) design. I rang up co-founder Ethan Lance to find out if a lack of taste makes waste, or, eventually, a cyber fortune. 

The Mercedes CLK 63 AMG Cabriolet is like a woman with large, perfectly shaped breasts. No matter how much you try to talk about her other qualities, your attention keeps returning to one thing: the engine’s enormous peak output. The CLK holsters AMG’s first purpose-built powerplant, a normally aspirated mill good for 475 horsepower (507 in its less restricted sibilings). As usual, it’s assembled in Affalterbach by one satanic mechanic, whose name is stamped on a plate affixed to the engine block. In another nod to heritage, the “63” represents the engine’s displacement rounded up from 6.2-liters; homage to the legendary 300 SEL 6.3 produced by Mercedes-Benz from 1968-1972. That’s some heavy heritage.

Motor Trend just reviewed the new Saturn Aura. Reading between the lines, it’s clear that GM’s mission critical mainstream motor is another in a long, not-so-illustrious line of “almost” cars. It’s “no sports sedan” with lots of “corner cutting” powered by a “crude” engine with “some looseness in the drivetrain.” The Aura is a “step in the right direction”– that leaves the badge-engineered Opel at least two steps behind the competition. Anyway, does it even matter? I reckon GM’s car business is beyond repair. 

Every time an automotive research firm releases the results of a reliability survey, the focus is the same: who “won.” Firms like J.D. Power only publicly release model-level results for the top performers. Even where these firms release scores for all contenders at the make level, journalists focus on the winners. After all, John Q. wants someone to tell him which car to buy in as few words as possible. In the process, any car buyer truly interested in identifying the best car for their needs and wants gets left in the dark.

F1 is the prima donna of the motorsports stage, steeped in tradition. To the idealistic amongst us, Max and Bernie’s show stills sings a siren song: dazzling technology, elite pilots, glitz and glamour, the passion of competition and the pursuit of perfection. The reality is somewhat grimier and less spectacular than the sport’s aura would lead us to believe. Even so, there are good reasons why today’s races have so little in common with the epic and sometimes fatal battles of the sport’s golden age.