By on November 12, 2018

Image: FCA

Some police operations are only made possible by the inclusion of vehicles with 164 horsepower, a (debatably) has-been reggae/pop singer, and the guy from Dune.

The latest marketing coup, if it can be called that, on Fiat Chrysler’s plate involves these three elements, combined with an ’80s-themed, Crockett & Tubbs-like storyline and a hysterical typo that’s still on the automaker’s media site.

First off, there seems to be a new music video from two artists this author hopes to never hear new material from. Sting, known for singing about teachers lusted after by students half their age, and Shaggy, who had some mainstream hits in the pre-social media era, have a collaboration they want you to know about. Fiat Chrysler wants you to know, too.

The video, according to FCA, “pairs Sting and Shaggy as two Miami detectives who convince their captain that they’re ‘going to need the Spider,’ meaning his prized Fiat 124 Spider Abarth, as part of their South Beach stakeout for ‘the most dangerous woman in the country.'”

“What could go wrong?!” the automaker asks. Well, accusations of sexism on Twitter, for one. Tsk, tsk. One wonders if the more powerful vehicles in the Miami PD’s patrol fleet might have been better choices for this get-the-gals operation. Oh well, there’s few choices when you’re hoping to get to 60mph in 6.3 seconds these days.

Whoever wrote the material accompanying this unlikely release might have had something else on his (definitely his) mind. Speaking of Shaggy, the site tells us “the Jamaican-born American reggae fusion singer is best known for his singles “Boobmastic,” “It Wasn’t Me” and “Angel.”

Consider this TTAC post a public service. It’s Boombastic. Typos are often doubly unfortunate, and this is just Example 143,846,904. Take away the “s” and we’d have been wondering about a new transmission.

If you’re now suddenly more intrigued by the video with Shaggy and the tantric sex guy, just know that the Abarth-badged car boosts power over stock Spiders by a whopping 4 ponies. Torque stays the same at 184 lb-ft. As the star of the moribund Fiat brand, the Spider hasn’t had any luck in picking up more sales than last year, with October’s Spider volume falling 12 percent, year over year. Going on sale in July of 2016, the Spider borrows its architecture from the far more revered Mazda MX-5 Miata, though the Italians have stripped the mechanicals in favor of a Multiair 1.4-liter turbo four-cylinder and in-house transmission options.

Through October, Spider sales fell 20 percent in the U.S., though it’s a far better showing than the Fiat brand itself. The seemingly futureless marque saw its volume decline 43 percent in the first 10 months of 2018. Not that FCA’s all that concerned — sky-high Ram and Jeep sales propelled the automaker to a 16 percent volume gain in October, with year-to-date sales up 7 percent.

[Image: Fiat Chrysler Automobiles]

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9 Comments on “Get Yer Fiats Out: Hilariously Unlikely FCA Marketing Tie-up Includes an Unfortunate Typo...”

  • avatar

    luv too see a boobmastic little angle

  • avatar

    Ariana Savalas and Post Modern Jukebox do a 60’s style Tom Jones cover of It wasn’t me. Given that the lyrics are actually intelligible, it is NSFW.

  • avatar

    What’s “Boobmastic”? Can I find it at Home Depot, in the flooring section?

  • avatar

    Sting: The recording artist that is determined to never go away.

    And I really wish he would. Back-dated about thirty years.

    • 0 avatar

      lol agreed. I can’t stand average people/things that are endlessly promoted (by self and otherwise) to appear greater than they really are. Everything in this ad falls into that category.

      • 0 avatar

        Sting is the William Shatner of pop music. Any project that keeps him in the public eye seems to be good enough for him. Although I guess he deserves some credit for not cashing in on endless Police reunion tours.

  • avatar

    I want to like the spider and maybe I would if I ever get a chance to test drive, but I wish they could have made the interior slightly bigger for us over 6ft tall. Seat pushed all the way back is tight for me. I think it looks half way good when you get out of base trim levels that have the body color windshield surround. The Silver looks much better around the windshield.

    EDIT: And offered the Mazda 2.5T. This is going to be yet another example of perfect car, horrible drivetrain option. Literally the engine exists just shove it in there. It’s sad to think Mazda, Fiat, BMW, GM, FCA, Ford, Toyota have all succumbed to this dumbarse lack of common sense.

  • avatar

    I drove the Abarth back to back with the new Miata. No contest, the Italians made a mess of the platform. Lifeless steering, and you have to hit the sport button every time you start the car to correct the throttle response and steering so that you can have 8/10’s of a Miata.

    Considering that the Fiat is heavier, and the Miata just became more powerful for 2019, there’s no reason to look at the Fiat unless you prefer the looks, get a great deal, or need best in class trunk space.

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