Ask The Best&Brightest: Is Vodka's Future Just A Mirage?

Jack Baruth
by Jack Baruth

Over the past five years, my home has often resembled the fabled Island Of Misfit Toys, with various people coming and going as fate decreed. That would make me King Moonracer, then, and it has made the infamous Vodka McBigbra the island’s princess. In the near future, however, she’ll be moving out to spend more time with her family. This will reduce but not eliminate her ability to call on my fleet of random cars for backup when her well-traveled 2005 Hyundai Accent requires repair.

It’s new-car time, then. She has the ability and willingness to buy a new 2014 Mitsubishi Mirage DE with continuously variable transmission — having driven a stick-shift M35 truck during her stint in the Army, Vodka’s done with clutch pedals 4 lyfe, yo. I’m inclined to agree with her proposed purchase, John Pearley Huffman’s unfriendly Times review aside.

But surely you have other opinions.



The approximate requirements are:

  • Well under fifteen grand out the door
  • Warranty lasting as long as the payments
  • Automatic transmission
  • Air conditioning
  • And that’s it

We’ve looked at a few low-mileage Accents, but the used-car market is feverishly hot right now thanks to the Obamaconomy/Boehnerdoggle’s wholesale relocation of the middle class to a buy-here-pay-here lot. As much as this woman has suffered in our relationship already, I don’t care to extend that suffering with the acquisition of an Aveo. The Fiesta’s DCT makes me nervous.

I honestly don’t know. The Mirage seems like a decent deal. She rarely drives on the freeway and is physically small (5’5″ and 115 pounds) so the packaging of Mitsubishi’s Thai takeout seems reasonable. What say you? Should we just head over to the Mitsu dealership on Monday and make it so?

Jack Baruth
Jack Baruth

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  • Master Baiter Master Baiter on Jul 05, 2014

    Nice headlights.

  • ShoogyBee ShoogyBee on Jul 06, 2014

    If she *has* to go new, then I'd go with a Mazda 2 or a Nissan Versa Note. If one can get a Sentra for around $15K, then that would be a reasonable contender as well. It sounds like the Mazda 2 can be had for hundreds, if not a thousand or two, less than either of the Nissans. Just over a year ago, I bought a CPO 2010 Camry LE (4 cyl, power driver's seat, moonroof) with 31K miles for $16K even. It was in perfect condition and if I had to do it all over again, I'd go for that Camry over any of the aforementioned vehicles in a heartbeat. But again, if having a new car under a full warranty is that important to her, then the Mazda and Nissans would be reasonable options.

  • MaintenanceCosts Poorly packaged, oddly proportioned small CUV with an unrefined hybrid powertrain and a luxury-market price? Who wouldn't want it?
  • MaintenanceCosts Who knows whether it rides or handles acceptably or whether it chews up a set of tires in 5000 miles, but we definitely know it has a "mature stance."Sounds like JUST the kind of previous owner you'd want…
  • 28-Cars-Later Nissan will be very fortunate to not be in the Japanese equivalent of Chapter 11 reorganization over the next 36 months, "getting rolling" is a luxury (also, I see what you did there).
  • MaintenanceCosts RAM! RAM! RAM! ...... the child in the crosswalk that you can't see over the hood of this factory-lifted beast.
  • 3-On-The-Tree Yes all the Older Land Cruiser’s and samurai’s have gone up here as well. I’ve taken both vehicle ps on some pretty rough roads exploring old mine shafts etc. I bought mine right before I deployed back in 08 and got it for $4000 and also bought another that is non running for parts, got a complete engine, drive train. The mice love it unfortunately.
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