Bailout Watch 13: One Bailout to Unite Them All

Edward Niedermeyer
by Edward Niedermeyer
bailout watch 13 one bailout to unite them all

Say what you want about Detroit, it still has some class. The media may already be counting the bailout billions, but the once-big three will be waiting until after Labor Day to visit Washington, hat in hand. Per Emily Post's corporate welfare etiquette, natch. The Wall Street Journal also reports that the Detroit three will speak with a single voice during upcoming meetings with federal loan officers. As in no screwing over Chrysler for a better deal. Of course that means the projected $50b will have to be split three ways. And then there's that damn CAFE ramp-up to worry about. In fact, Detroit insiders are already saying that 2011 compliance alone could take up the whole $50b. Why, it's almost as if Detroit might need even more money! But with political season in full swing and the economy emerging as a major issue, Detroit knows it has only to ask. Posturing representatives will hand out loans for the electoral feel-good, and before you know it there'll be a Volt in every pot. And billions of dollars in taxpayer liability for three spectacularly failing enterprises.

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  • Fred C.Dobbs Fred C.Dobbs on Aug 28, 2008

    What? a paltry one-time $50b for the late "big 3"? Give me an Ultramatic break. The check-kiteing brown-shoe pols will just place an extra line item in the budget every year labeled "Detroit".

  • Redbarchetta Redbarchetta on Aug 28, 2008

    Wouldnt it be easier and smarter to just give the $100 billion they are going to waste all in all to someone to just start a brand new American auto company that is RUN PROPERLY with competent management. Or simply use that money to send all the out of work auto workers from Detriots death to Harvard. What a collasal waste of money, stupid pols always flushing our money down the toilet. For that amount of money we are going to dump into these clowns we could do a real dent into retooling our infastructure to be all electric AND get money to startups to get those electric cars to customers. Every day I lose more and more faith in this countries future.

  • Mark MacInnis Mark MacInnis on Aug 28, 2008

    Any member of congress who approves of a loan guarantee/bailout without insisting that no member of top management receives a salary greater than that of the president of the united states is a traitor. Any citizen who VOTES for any of the above should be deported permanently. This is nuts. N-V-T-S, Nuts!

  • Oboylepr Oboylepr on Aug 28, 2008

    Giving money to Wagoner and co. is like putting a fox in charge of the chicken coup. The whole idea really brings images of pigs, swill and feeding throughs to mind. I do hope that severe and I do mean SEVERE conditions come with any bailout for the sake of the US tax payer. The fact that the likes of Wagoner can do such an abysmal job for so many years and then ask for a bailout shows that he has a neck like a jockey's arse. Fire, aim, ready at it's best!