Subaru: The Love That Dares Speak Its Name

Robert Farago
by Robert Farago
subaru the love that dares speak its name

Regular readers will know of the kerfuffle following our decision to call-out the pudenda-nosed Subaru B9 Tribeca's front end for having a "flying vagina" design. In fact, we'd like to take credit for the Tribeca's redesign, which traded a passion for private parts for a Pacifica pastiche. But we in no way accept responsibility for Subaru's new ad campaign, which focuses on owners' big love for the brand. "Subaru owners are 'experience seekers' — they want to live bigger, more engaged lives," reveals John Colasanti, CEO of Subie's ad agency. "They choose Subaru as a conscious alternative to the mainstream. [ED: Is that a nod to the brand's lesbian following?] To them, the car is the enabler of that bigger life. [ED: Is that another nod to size queens? Does this have something to do with the naming of the Outback?] By focusing on the love they have for their car, Subaru is challenging non-owners: do you love your car?" Yes! Yes! YES! I'll have whatever she's having. To be fair (WTH, it's Friday), the new Subie ads are split into three tiers: The Heart, The Brain, and The Wallet. So this smutty stuff is all in my head. So to speak.

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  • Jerseydevil Jerseydevil on Apr 25, 2008

    subaru has been advertising to lesbian women for years... martina navrotolova(sp?)was, (is) a spokesperson. ps. lesbian women i know prefer hondas, one hybrid civic, one a crv, one a pilot, go figure.

  • Taxman100 Taxman100 on Apr 27, 2008

    I like Subaru because they are rather practical vehicles, at least the older designs are. They do tend to have a stereotype of a vehicle for the granola set, or the lesbian types. I personally don't know any lesbians, probably because they wouldn't be lesbian for long once they met me!

  • The Luigiian The Luigiian on Apr 27, 2008

    My lesbian friend drives a purple VW Beetle. The old kind. I guess it reminds her of a gay Bumblebee from the Transformers or something, she loves it any way you look at it. I showed her the Chevy Camaro. Says it's nice, but nothing will replace her Beetle. My uncle, on the other hand, drives a Subaru Baja. Always wanted one, thought they were pretty cool, like a car-based mini-truck with decent fuel economy and four full seats. Rest of the lineup, not so much. I think the Subaru Baja is the only car ever produced by Subaru that had anything interesting going on about it, and even then it only got 21 mpg. Had they given it three more mpg's, slightly cheaper cloth interior as an option, and a midgate, it would have sold much better than it did. As for the Tribeca: Both versions are hideous, but the new one is merely boring while the old one looks like something Ford would make and call it "The Edsel for the SUV generation." I'd rather an Escape, Jeep Patriot, anything but that. And what's up with 18 mpg on premium fuel? You could buy an attractive Toyota 4-Runner that'll get 17 on regular. What's the point? After hearing that Subie's banned Farago just for making fun of a stupidly ugly car that probably shouldn't have been made in the first place, I think I'll shy away from Subaru. Boring, unattractive cars with no panache or reason to exist.* *Except maybe the Baja. At least it had a pickup bed and a unique selling point all rolled into one.

  • Cynder Cynder on Apr 27, 2008

    Even in Alaska, where Subaru certainly accounts for 20% of all vehicle sales (possibly 6 or 7 cars a year--joking), they have a reputation for being a bit granola/free-love/lesbian. Personally, I don't care so much because the engineering is so good. Subaru really know's how to build good cars that work well in Alaska.