#DougDemuro

Our man Derek Kreindler lives in Canada. That means his life is enriched by things we Americans can only imagine, such as Tim Hortons and the phrase “Bob’s your uncle.” Also, politeness.

Some things never change. Lying politicians, for example. And racist YouTube commenters. But also the JD Power Long-Term Vehicle Dependability Study, which was just released for 2013. Like always, Lexus and Lincoln were near the top, proving that old people can’t figure out in-car computer systems well enough to give them low ratings. Porsche was also near the top, proving that at least one German brand still has some idea what it’s doing.

From my post yesterday, you might get the feeling that I think all special editions are bad. That isn’t true. Occasionally, a car company makes a special edition when it’s not desperate. And occasionally, it’s pretty good – even if it doesn’t include extra horsepower. This post details all those special editions that were surprisingly tolerable – even if they were mostly unique badging and special paint.

Sometimes, car companies get desperate. This usually happens at the end of a model run, when a car is obsolete but the new one isn’t quite ready to launch. Or, if you’re Chrysler, this happens the day a new model is released.

Launching a new car is a very difficult proposition. Years of engineering work, design debates and logistical nightmares all culminate in the release of a brand new model. Suppliers print brochures, lawyers pour over owner’s manuals. Focus groups voice opinions on everything from interior materials to sunroof size. Years after work started, the car finally reaches the market.

And then it’s ruined by the launch color.

In general, having kids requires surrendering some semblance of “cool.” With kids, for instance, living room orgies have to stop – at least after 9pm. And money that would’ve been spent on tires and brakes must instead go to Huggies and strollers that fold to the size of an umbrella.

But the addition of children doesn’t need to mean buying a boring minivan or SUV. No matter your budget, you can keep your vehicular “cool” when wee ones come along. Allow me to list some of the coolest family cars for dads who aren’t yet ready to drive an Odyssey with a stick figure family on the back.

With the Chicago Auto Show behind us, automakers readying new trim levels and minor engine revisions will have to wait until next year’s Chicago Auto Show, which – aside from wordy Internet press releases – has become the official place for such unveilings.

Last year, carmakers sold more than 1.8 million midsize sedans in the United States. That’s 155,000 per month; 5,095 per day; 212 per hour. It’s 3.53 per minute, even when the dealers are closed, the lights are off, and the salespeople are fast asleep, dreaming of silk ties and customers who show up in rental cars.

The manual transmission is dying. We know this because other sites constantly run articles about the death of the manual transmission, predicting its final demise sometime in the next few years, weeks, or hours. Personally, I realized the manual’s future was limited on my last couple of trips to Europe, when I was given an automatic without even requesting it. On one occasion, I even returned the car without damage.

But while the manual may not be long for this world, there’s still the occasional vehicle that – against all odds, and market research – is offered with three pedals. Some are listed below, and I hope to hear about many more obscure stick shifts in the comments. Even if you’re TTAC’s top troll.

I recently read an article that said a growing number of young Americans would rather have a smartphone than a car. Half of American teenagers prefer web access to car access, said the article, and communicating via text, e-mail or social media is taking the place of actually driving somewhere to spend time with someone. You know – in person.

This is, of course, because times are changing. Years ago, turning 16 meant inheriting a dead relative’s full-size sedan with V8 power, rear-wheel drive, and no traction control. Gas was eleven cents a gallon. It was practically an invitation to hoon. But today, turning 16 means spending thousands just to get saddled with a four-cylinder economy car that has annoying features like airbags and disc brakes. No wonder teens don’t want cars: their smartphones are probably faster. And less expensive.

Or are they?

I recently rented a midsize sedan from Hertz. Hoping for a go in the latest Fusion, I was instead placed into a new Camry, though it may have been a 2007 Camry. Differences between the two are only discernible to Toyota engineers, though a new campaign gives dealers the ability to tell them apart using a VIN decoder and a magnifying glass.

Tune in, drop out

With Barrett-Jackson Scottsdale over, aging hairy-chested executives are now returning to McMansions all across America, short seven figures but up one or two muscle cars. Yes, there were some big sales this year, like the Batmobile that went for $4.6 million even though it’s based on a Lincoln and doesn’t have any rocket launchers. But this Barrett-Jackson summary is for all the car geeks out there, highlighting a few less publicized sales that still managed to raise my eyebrows as I sat on my couch watching the results and eating donuts.

I’ve recently decided I need a second car, even though I am, in fact, only one person. Car guys get it: different cars serve different purposes, and the second car will be a weekend toy. My girlfriend isn’t as sympathetic despite possessing 26 pairs of shoes, each of which look exactly the same to the naked eye.