Bark's Bites: Dealers Are the Worst Businessmen, Part One

Imagine that you owned a successful business. For many of you reading this today (including me), you don’t have to imagine, because you’ve done it. If you owned anything from a lemonade stand to a global airline, you’d have a pretty good idea of your costs and profits. You’d know which advertising sources worked best for your business. You’d strive to know where your customers came from. You’d have a system for hiring and training employees.

You’d do all of this and more, because you must have all of your ducks lined up in pretty little rows to be successful.

Well, that is unless you’re a car dealer. In that case, you may have no idea about any part of how your business works and still make money hand over fist.

Don’t believe me? Over the next several weeks, I’ll prove it to you. Today we’ll start with a simple concept that befuddles most dealers: online merchandising.

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Tesla Tote Bags, Ferrari Dice & Hummer Cologne: The World of Automotive Brand Licensing

Ferrari dice: $105 at the Ferrari Store

I’ll have to dig up the press kit to double check but I seem to recall that more than a dozen years ago, Puma and Fila were already selling about $250 million a year worth of Ferrari branded shoes and apparel. While a lot of people mocked Cadillac brand-strategy-whatever Melody Lee for her recent comments about turning Cadillac into a luxury brand, not just a seller of cars, licensing deals and brand extensions like the Porsche Design retail shops are now big business in the car biz.

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The Future Of Car Brands: Scooters

If you exist outside the fast-paced world of the automotive branding community, you might believe that the point of car brands is to sell cars. Needless to say, you’d be wrong. The big buzzword around car brands, particularly the more niche and eco-friendly brands is “mobility.” As in “we must leverage our brand values to provide a broad-based mobility strategy for the cities of the future.” Or, to put it into layman’s terms, “screw cars, we gotta start building scooters.”

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  • Rna65689660 There are colors you lease, and colors you buy. Never buy any shade of silver, grey due to the fact it matches the road surface. White only looks good on some cars, but great on appliances.Currently on British Racing Green,MINIWife is on Red, Edge. Going to Hot Pepper Red, Bronco Sport in a few weeks.
  • MKizzy I was only into black cars and am on my third black sedan in a row after starting my car ownership life with an inherited blue vehicle. I am starting to change my mindset and will (probably) find another color for my next vehicle. I still love black, but in the 2020s, black vehicles are lost in a grayscale sea piloted by time and financially stressed owners prioritizing resale value and low maintenance over appearance.
  • Cla65691460 will you look at that!...no "fix it again tony" jokes from the "best and brightest"
  • Mike-NB2 When I ordered my Golf R a while back, I broke with my decades-long tradition of a black car, not because I wanted to branch out a bit, but because there is a certain blue hue that's associated with the R. That blue (Lapiz Blue) is through the exterior trim and interior of the car even if you go with black or white. It's the colour for the R. That's why I chose it. And I'm glad I did.On a related note, I was coming back from a meeting today (in a rental, not my car, so couldn't flag the guy down without looking odd) and came up on a Mk 7 Golf R that was driving rather slowly in the right lane of the highway. It appeared to be black, but as I got beside it, I noticed that it was one of the dark purple hues on the Spektrum palette that was available on the Mk 7. For those who don't remember it, there were standard colours and then there were 40 additional colours for $3500 more. Oddly, the driver was in his 70s, so whether it was his car or not, I don't know. No, that's no slight against an older person driving a performance car. I'll be 58 in a couple of months, so I'm not going to criticize him.
  • MrIcky My car is header orange - so basically a safety cone. My trucks have always been white because scratches don't show up as much.