Ace of Base: Citroen C1 5-Door Feel

It’s always fun to see how the other half lives. In Europe, thanks in part to narrow roads that wind between ancient monuments and fuel prices several orders of magnitude greater than our own, small cars are king. When Citroën left our market in 1974, its only offering was the great-when-it-worked SM coupe.

These days, Citroën hawks a large range of cars on the other side of the pond. Compared to small base cars on our shores, does the C1 exhibit radical ideas or a dose of common sense? Whatever it is, there’s scads of it scattered all over the thing.

Displaying typical French weirdness, the C1 has trim levels named “Touch” and “Feel,” which sound like big fun until you realize they’re meant only for the car. The base 5-Door trim is the Feel. Up front, we find an alarming set of headlights seemingly inspired by the Nissan Juke and a narrow set of daytime running lights which make the car look like it’s in a perpetual state of needing to sneeze.

Inside this Gallic hatch, the cinnamon bun of a gauge cluster must be studied like tax forms, with the speed readout layered on top of fuel and mileage information like a multi-tiered eclair. The remainder of the interior looks fairly straightforward and at least no more alien than current efforts from small car purveyors in our country. Be sure to tune up your hearing – a tachometer is optional on base models so drivers will have to shift by ear.

A 1.0-liter inline three-cylinder makes a total of 63 horsepower and 70 lb-ft of torque. These power numbers means acceleration is best measured with a calendar, or by simply holding a rock in your hand and waiting for it to erode. Standing just 57.5 inches tall and measuring a scant 136 inches long, the C1 is over half a foot shorter than the 2017 Chevy Spark but about the same height. No room to park the C1 on the street or in your driveway? Simply bring it inside and hang it up on the wall.

Opposite of manufacturers on this side of the pond, Citroen charges more for colors on the greyscale but the Red Scarlet shown here is included gratis. Those zany French. Notably, base versions of the C1 5-Door headed to England have tasty Sunrise Red Zebra cloth covering the interior, giving this author flashbacks to the cloth selected by Chrysler for its Neon in the mid-90s.

The C1 5-Door in Feel trim is advertised in France at 10,850 euros, equating to $12,130 (USD). For that price, buyers will find niceties such as air conditioning, a large color infotainment touchscreen, and a basket of buttery croissants. A height adjustable seat is standard — a pleasing addition for drivers who count themselves among the descendants of Napoleon.

Good equipment levels, quirky styling, and zebra patterns on the seats? For just over twelve grand? Mon dieu! Why don’t the French sell cars here? Oh, right.

[Image: Kletr/ Bigstock.com]