Volkswagen Execs Have Lost the Plot

Aaron Cole
by Aaron Cole
volkswagen execs have lost the plot

Refuting a report that many Volkswagen managers were involved with a widespread cheating scandal involving 11 million cars worldwide, at least three different regional offices and hundreds of employees, the automaker’s top brass has other ideas.

“No one has spoken with me,” Volkswagen’s CEO Matthis Müller told reporters on Thursday according to Reuters. “You got the information from some sources who have no idea about the whole matter.”

Set us straight then, Müller. Tell us how hundreds of confiscated hard drives and terabytes of data from multiple offices — those are VW’s figures, not ours — and more than 380 interviewed employees contradict a report that a department was scared shitless to raise their hands and admit failure to higher ups? Because that case is shaping up quite nicely.

Will you tell us now?

“Is it really so difficult to accept that we are obliged by stock market law to submit a report to the AGM on April 21 and that it is not possible for us to say anything beforehand?” the CEO asked, according to Reuters.

Oh.

Actually, yes. That’s difficult to accept.

Especially because Volkswagen stockholders and local officials have pressed the automaker into moving more quickly, which has cost the company billions in lost value. Especially because by the time Volkswagen presents its own report, it’ll have been nearly two years since the ICCT notified the automaker that its emissions were suspect.

It’s difficult to accept that after repeated gaffes and delays, Volkswagen wouldn’t be more forthcoming — even after the company admitted being more open would be necessary to move on.

Even still, it’s difficult to accept that Müller still has a job.

[Image: Volkswagen]

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  • Astrocortex Astrocortex on Jan 29, 2016

    The real question is what future does my 2012 Touareg TDI have?

    • See 8 previous
    • LeeK LeeK on Jan 31, 2016

      @DenverMike The thing is, nobody knows yet what the software flash's effect will have on performance. The good news is that you already have an AdBlue system integrated in your SUV so it's a matter of tweaking the parameters a bit to reduce emissions. Will that lower your overall fuel mileage? Probably, but I predict only a few percent. Will that reduce power? Again, probably yes but only in certain conditions that you may not even notice in everyday driving. I've been keeping up with the Touareg forums quite regularly (my wife drives one) and there is a bunch of speculation but no hard facts yet. It may be many months before anything is offered up by VW and you may have the option of not having the flash done at all. It depends on your state's emissions control policies and whether your SUV is tested as a requirement for license renewal. When I lived in the east, I had to get my cars tested every year. Here in the southwest, there is no such test, ever.

  • Tailgate1234 Tailgate1234 on Jan 31, 2016

    Herr Schultz, he knows nothink.

  • Art Vandelay It is a shame, this is the perfect sort of vehicle for EBFlex and Tassos to puff each other's peters in but as it is electric, EBFlex will miss out. Sad
  • Art Vandelay Coming to a rental lot near you. And when it does know there is a good chance EBFlex and Tassos have puffed each other's peters in it!
  • Art Vandelay I doubt there is even room for EBFlex and Tassos to puff each other's peters in that POS
  • Art Vandelay The lack of side windows is a boon for EBFlex and Tassos as nobody can see them puffing each other's peters back there!
  • Art Vandelay They all have sunroofs which is good for EBFlex and Tassos...one can stand and hang out the roof while the other puffs his peter
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