Back when I was looking for a cheap suspension-donor Lexus SC400, I had a couple of friends tell me to be careful when I went to go look at clapped-out Americanized Soarers with three-digit price tags: “All worn-out SC400s, in fact all worn-out Lexuses, are owned by murderers! You’ll see!” As it turned out, none of the cars I looked at had trunks full of quicklime, shovels, and duct tape… but that got me to thinking about the “murderer car” thing. Which car available today has the image of being owned by the scariest, manslaughteringest individuals? My answer, which I know to be the correct one, may be seen after the jump.
Yeah, the Toyota Echo. American car buyers were afraid of the Echo from the beginning, for good reason; it’s just a creepy-looking car! Toyota had to recycle the chassis of the Echo in the much-less-creepy Scion xA and xB.
It sure didn’t help that Robin Williams’ scary stalker character in One Hour Photo drove an Echo. All right, so what’s your choice of frightening Murderer Car?
Countless episodes of Law & Order, 24, and the movie Patriot Games have taught me that nothing good comes from windowless full size vans. There have been more than one serial killer that liked pickups with bed caps. Then again Ted Bundy managed to put a pretty good taint on the humble VW Beetle.
As for the VW Beetle, you can’t forget the private detective from Blood Simple.
+1 Creepy windowless van for the win. Approved by molesters and murderers everywhere.
The question REALLY is: what is the vehicle that is SECOND most favored by murderers ?
Aah, the good ol’ Chevy Amber Alert.
The bus?
Does an Echo even have enough space to store a body? I’m going to go with the Aztek as being an ideal murderer-mobile. Lots of space for bodies, plastic drums and hydrofluoric acid. And you won’t likely want to screw with an Aztek driver just because it’s 2013 and they’re still driving such a thing. (they might have some problems in their head, such as Mr. White)
I guess an alternative vehicle is a beige (or other bland colour) Camry. No one will notice a generic Camry so it’s the perfect car for murderers.
If you listen to the wailing PR people in this business, you’ll hear that the biggest murderer out there drives a white Town Car SigLim.
Uh huh, did they happen to mention if it also has slight front end damage?
In the northeast, don’t the capos ride in black Town Cars? They have their “associates” do the “work” in former police car Crown Vics.
Camaros if you want to go by what Jeremy Clarkson says.
If we lump genocide in with murder I vote for the Mercedes Pullman 600.
LOL, yes. “This Camaro only has three previous murderers.”
I think Hannibal Lecter stole a pickup truck to drive out to the country in one of the movies in that series.
And we’ve all seen the old newsreel footage of Hitler in a Mercedes 770.
Oh yes, I can’t even see a clapped-out 3rd gen anymore without hearing Jeremy scream that while pulling discarded clothes out of the hatch…
Tan Ciera!
+1
Perfect!
Yaah, shoor…
So, ya know, he’s drinkin’. So I don’t think a great deal of it. But the misses, she heard about the homicides down here last week and she thought I should call it in. So’s I called it in. End o’ story.
What’d this guy look like, anyways?
Oh, he was a little guy. Kinda funny lookin’.
Uh-huh. In what way?
Oh, just a general kinda way.
That was “Burnt Umber Ciera,” yes?
“Prowler needs a jomp!” (Yup, the spelling error is intentional! ;-) )
I live in the Bay Area, seems like a ton of Lexus SCs (and LSs to slightly lower degree) end up in the hood by their third or fourth owners. Humorously enough, I totally attribute this to Bay Area rap from the early/mid 90s, when these cars were new. I believe it was B-Legit on E-40’s album “In a Major Way” who said:
“I’m in the SC four double O, sittin’ real low, stick in the flo’, oh, the ho wants me to come swoop her, take her for a ride in my blue lex luther, but the bitch ain’t got no gas fetti, so I burnt her like fast freddie, meet me on the first when your mail is comin’, and maybe we can go to the mall or somethin\'”
Oh, and you can’t forget Tupac’s lyric from “You wonder why they call you bitch” off of “All Eyez on Me”
“got them legs wide open while you’re sittin’ at the bar, talkin’ to some nigga ’bout his car, I guess he said he had a lexus, what’s next, you headin’ to his car for some sex”
Apologies for the language.
N2DEEP’s “Back to the Hotel”: “Set for the night so I took her to my ride, Grab my Mickey and my Buddha and I met her outside,
Who-ride, brother strikin’ through to be seen,
A Lexus 400 turnin’ triple gold Z’s”
I thought it was “…triple gold D’s”. As in Dayton wire wheels.
“To the Lexus LX – four and a half, bulletproof glass tints if I want some ass.”
-Hypnotize, Notorious BIG
If there’s a vehicle driven by those with flagrant disregard for the lives and well-being of others, it’s the Cadillac Escalade.
Since the 1986 movie “Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer” any beaten up early seventies Chevrolet. Both Henry and his nutter-friend drove one. Watch it if you see one on a parking lot !
Rap and hip hop always had an affinity for Lexus back in the 90s. Kind of a more affordable status symbol and an alternative to a Bimmer or Benz.
Jay Z still raps about his old Lexus…
Lincolns, Cadillac and Chrysler 300’s are favored by the Italian, Japanese and Russian Maffia.
Dodge Chargers and Nissans by the inner-city hoods.
I’m sure those folks in Lincolns are rolling Panthers and not MKRedundants.
I would say an all-black Brabus V12 is the Maffia’s favorite ride…certainly in Russia.
When I lived in Jersey, we referred to Town Cars as ” Mafia Staff Cars”
What is the first thing you think of when you are walking past a 1958 Plymouth?
Rust and torsion bars that go snap in the night.
If it’s red, don’t stand in front of it.
My dad had a blue one. It managed to break a torsion bar and a rear leaf spring shackle. So much for late 50’s Chrysler build quality.
Depends if it’s a red and white coupe.
And if you hear ’50s rock ‘n roll music coming from it…not good.
Not the same thing as when I walk past a still (barely) running Plymouth Reliant K with woodgrain apliques! *cring*
According to Dexter, it’s a Ford Escape.
Seriously though, there is nothing creepier than a windowless van.
Oh you mean his Escape which changes trim levels and interior appointments?
Or his Freestar van which came with leather and sat nav (according to the dealer) but when shown clearly has cloth – and never had a sat nav option?
Or the clapped out Kia he “bought” and then wrecked next episode, so they didn’t have to crash his Escape?
Or Deb’s wrecked BMW 3-series convertible, which was a generation older (about a 96) than the one she had been driving around in (about an 03).
I was thinking of the Escape that brother Sam fixed like 3 times. He’s used a few, but the Escape is the one I remember for some reason.
I only remember Deb’s green E36 convertible. Didn’t notice the E46.
Shows how much I am paying attention I guess.
Yes she switched sometime after the John Lithgow season to a pewter colored E46. Then the wreckage in whatever season couple years later of her E46 was an E36.
Or John Lithgow’s son’s 67 Mustang with faux GT 350 stripes that he takes a bat to.
The son hit it with a bat, not him.
Please tel me that your site got hacked and this is an unauthorized post.
The site got hacked. Your post is unauthorized.
The silver ’98 to ’03 XLT Expedition has to be the most invisible SUV right now. A ‘like’ Camry would be more invisible, but we’re talking gangsters.
Well the Expedition that did the coup de grace on Phil Leotardo’s head was certainly invisible to him…but he was already dead.
If I were planning to go out right now and kidnap/kill women, I think I’d get a silver Camry with a clean grey interior. Camry has a spacious trunk and with some plastic wrap, I’d be able to collect pools of blood…
But you never actually kill anyone in the car because CSI teams easily detect the blood. What you do is wrap the person in plastic and gag them so they can’t move – then drug them so they are off-balance and unable to defend themselves. Then you use/dispose of them accordingly once you get to your destination.
If you’re gonna kill and wanna do it in style, I suggest the Mercedes S550. A lot of them are owned by aging retirees who can’t easily fight back. As they walk up to their car, you walk up, knock em out, and put them in the trunk. Then you can enjoy the cooled, heated, massage chairs until you’re able to take their body and dump them at your local hospital’s dumpster. Be careful of cameras though cause they ruin all the fun.
Yikes. Remind me to never get on your bad side BTSR.
I know this is the kinder, gentler TTAC, where we don’t criticize other posters. But, FTLOG, man. I hope you get some help.
Don’t get Big Trucks started on what he wants to do to people in hybrid / electric cars. (shiver)
You’ve put a frightening amount of thought into this..
That’s…just…great…
Next up: tips on how to rape a woman and get away with it.
Yikes.
No one said Bronco yet?
There is no proof OJ did it.
Where you there???
O.J., now there’s a blast from the past. Didn’t Kato recently admit OJ confessed to him?
Now I have to go listen to Norm MacDonald OJ jokes.
Kato would admit OJ gave him golden showers if he could make a buck from it…
There’s no proof that splitting an atom will release vast amounts of heat, but the evidence is sufficient.
Right before he was murdered, Michael Jordan’s father was driving a SC 400 when he pulled over to sleep on the side of Highway 74 right outside of Lumberton, NC. The two men who killed him were reported to have been drawn to his car which was fancy and new at the time. The men kept the car for awhile after disposing of Jordan, abusing it somewhat out in plan sight. I remember reading the news account where one woman reported seeing them with this fine, new car and tearing it up right there on the streets.
Someone tweet Aaron Hernandez and ask.
I don’t have a Twitter account.
Before his arrest I saw aerial footage of him supposedly driving a white Audi Q7 (or Q5 or whatever the fake SUV is called)
https://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/2012/09/junkyard-find-1994-lexus-sc400/
I think a few qualifiers must be added.
If you’re gonna murderdeathkill, you need something large for bodies. Inevitably you’ll need to go off road to dispose of them, so 4×4 is necessary. You need something common and cheapo so as not to draw suspicion, yet something not so clapped out as to arouse HOA members.
Expedition 1st gen, pref Eddie Bauer.
I think Gen 1 has the spark plug issue, I’d go Gen 2.
also
+1 on murderdeathkill.
Maybe an Olds 442 should be the car of choice?
Gen 2 isn’t too expensive?
Also, look what I finded!
http://nickecars.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/next-gen-2014-ford-expedition-side-view-photo.jpg
http://s1.cdn.autoevolution.com/images/news/gallery/medium/new-2014-ford-expedition-rendering-medium_1.jpg
Not bad. Would you accompany me to dinner and dancing, at Taco Bell?
Murderers might as well be car thieves, steal a Gen 2 lol.
Good find, the 2014 refresh looks nice.
BTW, you are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.
One of the better lines:
Lenina Huxley: Okay. Let’s go blow this guy.
John Spartan: [Annoyed] Away. Blow this guy *away*?
Lenina Huxley: Whatever.
LOL
Just realized that Lenina is no doubt based upon the character of the same first name from the Aldous Huxley novel Brave New World.
i never made the connection, nice catch.
The light blue cargo van–Buffalo Bill! I can barely listen to Tom Petty’s “American Girl” because of it.
Those old forward control panel trucks ~ when my Son was *very* young he once surprised me by saying ” raper van ” .
-Nate
It used to be that every gangster around drove a Cadillac…
But I can’t see gangsters (no, not gangstas, gangsters, big difference) driving XTSes.
Didnt’ those random shooters in DC use a big Chevy Impala or Caprice with a little round hole cut into the rear panel above the bumper?
1990 Light Blue Chevrolet Caprice with a hole cut in the rear panel above the bumper.
Full size Cadillac or Lincoln… with a full size trunk.
Anything on 26″ wheels
Were I come from the murders car is usually the victims car…
Jack / Derek:
I see that these QOTD get lots of replies, and no doubt help the hit rate, but “What car is most favored by murders?” ? We’ve had Weird color (which wasn’t) What’s next? Will we have Favorite ride of Republicans? Worst wheel covers?
I see that this site has some very good content (Alex’s reviews appear to take the most effort) and for straight fact reporting, that the comments from the B&B offer important insights and can help provide background on articles where the authors can’t afford the time to do all of the research.
But I don’t see how most of these silly QOTD provide the opportunity to provide meaningful insight into the automotive industry or to DISTINGUISH this website from something like Jalponik. In fact, they’ve got pictures of COTD to go with QOTD.
The only time I ever charged someone with capital M Murder was back when I was assigned to Crimes Against Children. His vehicle was a maroon Chevrolet Trailblazer. He got totally sh!tfaced in the middle of the day and left his 18- month old to bake in his car seat on an August afternoon.
1977-78 yellow Mercury Marquis coupe. (Easier to find in early 1995 than today, perhaps.)
CVPI?
I’m not sure if you mean the ones with the light bars or not, but true either way.
Tidbits I’ve discovered… #1 car driven by female killers, Ford Sedan
#1 car driven by men who cheat, BMW
#2 car driven by men who cheat, Audi
#3 car driven by men who cheat, Mercedes
#4 car driven by men who cheat, Rover
#1 car driven by women who cheat, BMW
#1 vehicle driven by millionaires Ford F-150
Draw your own conclusions
BMW: Almost a Century of Destroying Income, Parts, & Relationships
Where is this information from?
Paul Bernardo, one of Canada’s most notorious murderers, drove a Nissan 240SX. Russell Williams, another notorious Canadian murder, owned a Nissan Pathfinder.
I might want to stay away from people in Nissans.
hmmm …
Murders From Bad Drug Deals: late 80/90s Pontiac Trans-AM preferably in white
Murders From Mafia: Lincoln Town Car
Spur of the Moment: any minivan
Planned: Toyota Camry
Personal Recommendation: Jeep Grand Cherokee WJ body style
I found the same info except under “planned” it was white sedan… seems when a killer isn’t planning a murder they like to emulate cops
Currently in the back of my Caravan, minus rear seat for extra cargo room. Two blankets, shovel, machete, battery equipped drill, hatchet, rope, duct tape, roll of trash bags, boots, change of clothes, assorted chemicals.
I really need to clean it out. If there’s anything to the cops and profiling thing, I’m doomed.
F-150 with one of those low profile fiberglass camper shells. Common, lots of room, and attracts zero attention wherever it goes. Or even without the camper shell, see “The Minus Man” for an example.
Easy answer, corporate owned, chauffeur driven limousine. Heads of corporations kill more people than handguns ever will. They just cover it up better than most murderers.
John Wayne Gacy- 1979 Delta 88, Ted Kennedy- 1967 Delta 88… hmm
Actually Ted was driving the less expensive Delmont 88.
The “Beast”?
Wonder what the Manson family drove or kept in their desert compound? My copy of Helter Skelter is packed away in storage.
Vintage Dodge Power wagon
http://jalopnik.com/5665953/charles-mansons-forgotten-getaway-truck
As as wayward young lad he stole vehicles of various makes and models.
If it is a professional hit man, he or she will never drive the same car.
They’ll likely rent the most innocuous and ubiquitous vehicle that is available on the lot under a false name.
So it’ll be somewhere between a Camry, Accord up to a Malibu or Impala.
And if you watch Dexter often enough, you’ll know there is really no pattern. Anything from clapped out old beaters to brand new sportscars is on the menu.
We only know the good guy drives a Ford Escape :-)
Oh and we can of course not forget the Panther cars in the list of suspects.
If any car would be a candidate then the family of Panthers would be on the very top of the list.
Ubiquitous, Innocuous but still badass and tons of room in the trunk.
Aston Martin DB5. Or maybe the 6000 SUX.
When an old H platform GM rolls down your street, late at night, one taillamp smashed out, two individuals, inside with their seats leaned all the way back, tell me you don’t have an involuntary shiver.
There’s no menace greater than a former granny-mobile, be it Buick, Olds or Pontiac, now in the service of violence and avarice. Any H survivors out on the road today are the equivalent of the drop gun; use it, lose it. Leave it for the cops to trace to a junkyard outside of Reno, where it’s supposed to be rusting away, waiting for the crusher, but isn’t. Instead, it’s parked in the long-term upper deck parking lot at O’Hare, reeking of decomposing flesh, leaking gas, and stale cigarette smoke.
How’d they get past the security gate?
O’Hare, easy. Long term lot only requires you pull up to the entry gate, push the button, take your ticket and park. It’s a couple miles from the airport, so you train it in from the lot. Because of the distance from the airport, there is no security at entry gate, but there is an attendant when you drive out the exit. The perps park the car, get on the train, get off, hop in a cab or in an accomplice’s car at arrivals. Or train it back into the city.
It’s a body dump location that’s used at least once a year. At least, that makes the news and we, the public, hear about it.
Ford Bronco…duh.