Hammer Time: Let My Sheeple Go!

Steven Lang
by Steven Lang

Well, I knew it was only a matter of time. Down in the furthest recesses of a new car dealer’s lot, I saw a line of vehicles with windshields covered in chalk. They all said the same thing: “C.A.R.S. Impound from K.O. Towing Company bought July.” There was a Ford Explorer, an Isuzu Rodeo, a purply swirly conversion van, and about 30 other bastard orphans. They were forsaken by their prior owners. Some voluntarily. Others perhaps on the influence of drug-laden stupidity. Then the real surprise came out . . .

We were told that we could have any vehicles on the other side of the fence for $2500. These were vehicles of the exact same type . . . with one exception. They were in far better condition. These were models that were rejected by the C.A.R.S. auditors for varying reasons. A lot of them surprisingly had no insurance at one point in the past year. This fact shocked the hell out of me because anyone who is involved in our industry realizes that most folks will drop their insurance when times get tight. Apparently these deals were done in haste.

But then again, what the hell were the impounded cars doing there? This made no sense to me unless the dealer had finally found some type of loophole, or friend. Hmmm. This store . . . a domestic . . . isn’t doing too well at all and has the inventory to show it. On the flip side, the Nissan dealer down the street has moved over 300 clunkers. It’s renting out several storage spaces between here and Deliverance.

Oh well. I knew certain dealers would win in the end. Que Sera, Sera . . . Or as this fellow is fond of saying . . .

Steven Lang
Steven Lang

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4 of 28 comments
  • Accs Accs on Aug 12, 2009

    Hmmm I just want to ask.. What is the point of the vehicle in picture? Is this what a GM puzzle looks like? GMC / Caddy front lights. Avalanche body for GMC. A ill fitting cap. and wheels from the standard GMT parts bin.

  • R H R H on Aug 13, 2009

    troonbop> I think you are using the wrong terminology. People don't have to be "citizens" here to be legal. My wife is a legal resident alien. Outside of not being able to vote, there isn't a whole lot of practical difference. I think she thinks some facets of citizenship laws here are silly (where she has to give up her Brazilian citizenship in order to be an "American"), but respects other laws such as driving with a valid drivers license + being insured just fine. Also: Is there a law that says she must speak fluent English? I mean she does, but I don't think that was required anywhere in her green card application.

  • Windswords Windswords on Aug 13, 2009

    davejay: "Would you feel better if it was an uninsured American who spoke English more fluently than you? Illegal immigration has nothing to do with this conversation." Just in case you missed this point: troonbop: "People who have no respect for the basic laws of citizenship of the United States have little regard about breaking another law."

  • The Comedian The Comedian on Aug 13, 2009

    Does C4C contain any no-flip provisions? Could I, for example, C4C a $100 piece of insured-registered junk for a $4,500 credit on a $9,999 Versa, then sell it in 2 months for $8,000, pulling a 20%+ profit on my out of pocket $6,000 spend (including reg/taxes)?