E85 Boondoggle Of The Day: Conquest Knight XV

Edward Niedermeyer
by Edward Niedermeyer

There should be no doubt in anyone’s mind that giant fuel-swilling dinosaurs are as American as fake boobs. So it stands to reason that giant, fuel-swilling dinosaurs powered by federally-subsidized, mileage-reducing, corn-based fuels must be more American still. The only thing such a vehicle needs to achieve an apotheosis of American automotive excess is a 10k pound curb weight and enough armor to make Saturday night joyrides through Fallujah as drama-free as the invasion of Grenada. This bold vision of an America with unlimited energy and enemies was made real today, when Conquest Vehicles unveiled their Knight XV luxury armored SUV. And where else would this happen, but in Las Vegas, at the annual SEMA show? The $300k Knight XV is built on a Ford Super Duty platform, powered by a 6.8-liter Ford V-10, making 400 to 500hp depending on how many oil wells you own. This beast is DOT certified (certifiable?), fully armored. It boasts night vision camera systems and a 2000w audio system (Ride of the Valkyries, anyone?). Oh right, and it’s “environmentally friendly.” As in flex-fuel capable. Because nothing says you care like a corn-juice-powered luxury armored car.

Edward Niedermeyer
Edward Niedermeyer

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  • JEC JEC on Nov 05, 2008

    cretinx Stop by the surplus store on the way home and buy a few dozen kevlar vests. Duct tape them inside the body panels and tada, armoured SUV on the cheap. Just hope the bad guys don't aim at the windows.

  • PabloKoh PabloKoh on Dec 10, 2008

    I wonder if you could drive it underwater. Tell the owner I want to try it. Right down a boat ramp.

  • Dave M. IMO this was the last of the solidly built MBs. Yes, they had the environmentally friendly disintegrating wiring harness, but besides that the mechanicals are pretty solid. I just bought my "forever" car (last new daily driver that'll ease me into retirement), but a 2015-16 E Class sedan is on my bucket list for future purchase. Beautiful design....
  • Rochester After years of self-driving being in the news, I still don't understand the psychology behind it. Not only don't I want this, but I find the idea absurd.
  • Douglas This timeframe of Mercedes has the self-disintegrating engine wiring harness. Not just the W124, but all of them from the early 90's. Only way to properly fix it is to replace it, which I understand to be difficult to find a new one/do it/pay for. Maybe others have actual experience with doing so and can give better hope. On top of that, it's a NH car with "a little bit of rust", which means to about anyone else in the USA it is probably the rustiest W124 they have ever seen. This is probably a $3000 car on a good day.
  • Formula m How many Hyundai and Kia’s do not have the original engine block it left the factory with 10yrs prior?
  • 1995 SC I will say that year 29 has been a little spendy on my car (Motor Mounts, Injectors and a Supercharger Service since it had to come off for the injectors, ABS Pump and the tool to cycle the valves to bleed the system, Front Calipers, rear pinion seal, transmission service with a new pan that has a drain, a gaggle of capacitors to fix the ride control module and a replacement amplifier for the stereo. Still needs an exhaust manifold gasket. The front end got serviced in year 28. On the plus side blank cassettes are increasingly easy to find so I have a solid collection of 90 minute playlists.