Watch Your Mouth: Custom Subaru Forester Arrives With an Interesting Name

Steph Willems
by Steph Willems
watch your mouth custom subaru forester arrives with an interesting name

“Famous flicks, Mr. Connery,” the fake Alex Trebek once said to the fake Scottish actor on SNL. The unspoken word in that long-ago sketch isn’t something you’d encourage your young kids to say, but it did help the career of many beloved stand-up comics.

Which brings us, oddly, to Subaru. The (predominantly) all-wheel-drive brand has crafted a very wholesome image of itself over the years, delighting children and seniors alike with its heavy use of canine actors in its ads. But there’s nothing wholesome about a vehicle that appeared this week at the Singapore Motor Show: the Forester Ultimate Customized Kit Special edition.

FUCKS, for short.

The jarringly customized Forester on display clearly wanted to get across that it gives none of those, as “edition” appeared in lowercase on the vehicle’s stand, positioned below the preceding words. Top Gear Philippines was the first to notice the brash vehicle’s rude name.

The new Subaru Forester F.U.C.K.S edition is… something pic.twitter.com/vLcAijFLQM

— laberge (@labergee) January 9, 2020

Before you get excited about the prospect of a lowered, blacked-out and tarted-up Forester appearing in a dealership near you, be it known that Subaru’s Asian media portals show no mention of this vehicle, meaning the only FUCKS you can expect to find at your local dealer are the smarmy salesman and the F&I guy pressuring you into a longer-term loan and an extended warranty.

By the looks of it, the would-be owner of this special Forester enjoys Monster energy drinks, vapes prolifically, has a closet full of flat-brimmed hats, and thinks the Rasputin beard fad is something worth continuing. An unfair stereotype, perhaps, but what else is one supposed to think when looking at this treatment? The pavement-rattling sound system sunk into the cargo floor tops it off.

Who bears responsibility for this naughty decision lurking in the Singapore Subaru booth? We don’t know, and frankly, we don’t particularly care.

All that said, the new-for-2019 Forester doesn’t look half bad with a reduced ground clearance and 20-inch hoops. It doesn’t look bad in stock form, either, and American consumers seem to think so, too. With 180,179 sales under its belt, last year proved to be the best in the Forester’s two-decade-long history.

[Image: Subaru]

Comments
Join the conversation
2 of 20 comments
  • REAL_sluggo REAL_sluggo on Jan 12, 2020

    Amongst lesbians, the Forrester is the most driven motor. I know this cuz the Internet said... And me mate Andy... He said it

  • 28-Cars-Later 28-Cars-Later on Jan 13, 2020

    "Before you get excited about the prospect of a lowered, blacked-out and tarted-up Forester appearing in a dealership near you, be it known that Subaru’s Asian media portals show no mention of this vehicle, meaning the only FUCKS you can expect to find at your local dealer are the smarmy salesman and the F&I guy pressuring you into a longer-term loan and an extended warranty." This is gold.

  • Vatchy If you want to talk about global warming, you might start here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darvaza_gas_crater
  • 28-Cars-Later $55,218 for a new GR Corolla: https://www.reddit.com/r/COROLLA/comments/zcw10i/toyota_needs_to_know_the_demand_is_there_but_this/"But if OTD prices get beyond 50k there are better options"That's what people were arguing in that thread.
  • Lou_BC "The Oldsmobile Diesel engine is a series of  V6 and  V8  diesel engines produced by  General Motors from 1978 to 1985. The 350 cu in (5.7 L) V8 was introduced in 1978, followed by a 261 cu in (4.3 L) V8 only for the 1979 model year. In 1982, a 263 cu in (4.3 L) V6 became available for both front and  rear-wheel drive vehicles. Sales peaked in 1981 at approximately 310,000 units, which represented 60% of the total U.S. passenger vehicle diesel market. However, this success was short-lived as the V8 diesel engine suffered severe reliability issues, and the engines were discontinued after the 1985 model year."I'd say one would be best off finding a gasser to plunk in there or take a loss and re-sell it.
  • ToolGuy GM Buying Guide:• Body on frame• V8 engine• Gasoline engine• Longitudinally-mounted engine• Normally-aspirated engine• Rear wheel drive (or 4WD)That's 6 items. Aim for 4 out of 6 or higher. (My two GM vehicles score a 6 and a 3.) This vehicle is a 1.
  • 28-Cars-Later Based on what people were posting, its going to debut with enough ADM to buy a CPO Porsche so why bother (Unless HMC can bring the hammer down somehow)?
Next