Freaky Friday: Cops Stop Lincoln Town Car With No Doors or Windshield, Axe Stuck in Roof
When Jared Price tooled through a small town on Monday in a Lincoln Town Car missing all four doors, bereft of any license plate, and with a gaping hole where the windshield was supposed to be (but equipped with an axe embedded, Excalibur style, in the roof) it’s not surprising the local sheriff’s department received a report of a “suspicious vehicle.”
It’s also not surprising that Price, 21, “performed poorly” on field sobriety tests when pulled over, or that at the sheriff’s office he was diagnosed by a certified Drug Recognition Expert as being “impaired by multiple different drug categories.”
No, what’s surprising is that this took place in upstate New York — in Wyoming County near Buffalo — not in Florida.
Price was charged with a variety of criminal and traffic infractions, including driving while ability impaired by drugs, driving while ability impaired by the combined influence of drugs, and operating a vehicle without registration or insurance. Bail was set at $10,000 cash or a $20,000 bond.
Perhaps in his allegedly impaired state Price confused his Lincoln with a Jeep Wrangler.
[Image: Wyoming County Sheriff’s Office]
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I tried to tell him that he was going to get the doors blown off if he drag raced. But did he listen? Nope.
Ole Bud returned to his hometown after the got out of the service. He got a job down at the local factory. A union job and a damn good one for a young man just out of the military. Bud worked hard, loved his wife, and made damn sure his kids went to college. He retired at age 65 after 43 years at the factory. They gave him a gold watch. He loved driving his Lincoln Town Car in his retirement years. He was proud of his car but would never admit it. Bud passed away and the Lincoln Town Car was left to his one son who had becomes a small town CPA. Bud's grandson, lets call him "Jamison" did a hitch in the service and came back to his hometown. Jamison couldn't get a job at his grandpa's old plant. Its production had been outsourced to China. The last jobs that plant would provide would be its demolition and the associated hazmat clean-up. Jamison wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer and someday hoped to attend the local junior college and become a welder. Someday. While Jamison waited/looked/hoped for a "real good job" or "something to hold on to", grandpa's old town barge was a sweet smooth ride. It could haul three overweight baby-mommas wanting to party or six skinny chicks who liked to snort meth. After one wild night of too many lines, wild turkey and redbulls and vodka at the bar; the local po-po pulled him over. At least Ashlee was able to escape arrest. One of her eyebrows rings is still in the Lincoln Town Car.