By on September 23, 2016

honda1

Hey! Did you know that I, your favorite writer on this or any other forum, with the possible exception of Penthouse Forum, am the proud owner of a Honda Accord EX-L V6 manual transmission coupe? Maybe you didn’t know! But now you know! So in the future there will be no excuse for you not knowing, with the exception of “utter apathy,” which would be a legitimate excuse, should you need one.

Let me give you the name of somebody who didn’t need to be reminded about my Accord ownership; my local Honda dealer. Not the guys who walljobbed me, but the good dealer. The one that actually puts new oil in the car when you pay for an oil change. I like this dealer. Were I to purchase another Honda, I would purchase it from them. Perhaps they know this, because they’ve just sent me an email with a GRRRREAT DEAL! on a new 2017 Accord Coupe. $16,000 and change — and this ain’t just any old Accord coupe, it’s an EX-L V6 manual, just like my current car.

There’s just one little catch.

The fine print on this deal is exceedingly fine. Let’s take a look:

Estimated quote based on 2017 Honda Accord Coupe V6 EX-L MT, w/ 2014 Honda Accord Coupe in trade-in excellent condition w/ avg. 12k mi. driven per year. $375 per month for 48 mos. w/ Tier 1 + credit score or buy for $16,611. Includes all applicable offers. Rates as low as 3.89% on select vehicles to qualified buyers with approved credit. 3.89% APR financing for 48 months at $22.58 per month, per $1,000 financed. Actual payment may vary. Every attempt has been made to ensure the accuracy of these figures based on current available information; we assume no responsibility for any unintended errors or assumptions. May not be combined w/ any other offers and is subject to change w/o prior notice. See dealer for details. Photos for illustration purposes only. Offers based upon programs, incentives and trade values at time of e-mailing. Valid through close of business 10/03/2016.

That’s right — in order to get a new Accord for $16K, I have to trade in my 2014 Accord. There’s no mention about paying off a loan in there, because the deal assumes that I’ve paid the car off, which I most certainly have not. Unlike all the millionaires-next-door who populate TTAC, I actually borrowed some money to buy the Accord, and while I certainly didn’t get a 72-month loan or anything like that, neither did I get a 31-month loan. I think I owe thirteen grand on it or thereabouts.

Let’s assume for the moment, however, that I did in fact pay cash for the Accord and have a clear title ready to hand over to the dealer. How much would I be getting for my car in this deal? Retail on a 2017 EX-L V6 6MT is $32,010. Invoice is $29,630. You’d be dead above the neck to not secure at least one percent below invoice on one of these, which would be $29,300 or thereabouts. I paid about 2.5-percent below invoice on my 2014 without really trying, while suffering from nine fractures and a missing spleen.

If we subtract $16,611 from $29,300, we get … hmm … $12,689. When I sold cars, we called that the “waste pitch.” There was this rigmarole we were trained to do. I couldn’t bring myself to do it, but I saw it done five times a day. It worked like so:

Jack, your helpful salesman: Well, Mr and Mrs. Jones, (winks at Mrs. Jones) we’ve agreed that this 1995 Ford Explorer XLT is the right vehicle for you. And we’ve appraised the 1992 Taurus you brought in. So … (brings out paperwork) we’re looking at a price of $29,620 for the Explorer, and a trade-in allowance of $4,000 for the Taurus, so all I need from you is … $27,349.35. Just sign right here and we’ll get it washed and gassed up.

(Long silence, during which Jack says nothing.)

Mr. Jones: (sputtering) But … but … but … that’s the sticker price of the car! And we owe twelve grand on the Taurus!

(Long silence, during which Jack says nothing. Then, with an embarrassed grin …)

Jack: Oh, geez, I’m sorry, of course we’re going to negotiate a bit … I just got ahead of myself. I just love to sell cars … (looks at Mrs. Jones with an innocent grin) and I’m not very good at the numbers. (Waves paperwork magnanimously to the side) Why don’t you tell me how close you can come to those numbers and we’ll start from there?

I was always told that one out of every hundred, maybe even one out of every fifty, customers would just sign on the line for the waste pitch out of embarrassment, fear, or politeness. I refused to do it. But I’m thinking that some minor percentage of the people who get this kind of email will just go to the dealer and take the deal as offered. And when they’re told that of course the trade has to be paid off first, they’ll just write a check from their savings to cover it.

Consider how many Honda drivers are conservative old Boomers sitting on pensions and million-dollar retirement plans and paid-off houses. A few grand one way or the other doesn’t matter much to them. Old people are surprisingly receptive to just paying cash for shit so they can avoid some hassle. My father just did that with his latest Benz, to my immense annoyance. Just went over to the dealer and gave them his paid-off car and a check to get another one, with very little negotiation. I’d eat glass before I did that. I’d negotiate at the God-damned grocery store if I thought I could get away with it. But I’m not a Boomer and I don’t have a pension.

Just how sweet of a deal is this trade offer? Well, I see cars just like mine listed at dealers for between $19,500 and $22,000. I’m thinking that most transactions end up a couple grand south of that. Let’s say $18,000 final retail. And if I sold it privately? A stick-shift V6? I think I could get $19,000 for it in a week. But $18,000 seems like a reasonable number for a dealer sale after they bury some negative equity in the mark’s earlier used Honda or whatnot. So it’s a $5,000 profit for the used-car side of the house, plus it’s a new-car sale, plus it’s a service customer. In other words, the dealership is running the table on me. Maybe they’re even running a train on me, if you want to get all loco-erotic on the subject.

I’m afraid I’m going to have to decline my dealership’s very friendly e-mail offer. I don’t particularly want to swap out my Accord. The half of my heart that never truly loved any car is annoyed by this complacency; the former serial-VW owner in me is frankly aghast that I don’t already have a strategy to shuffle the Accord off before it reaches the 36-month mark. It’s already out of the bumper-to-bumper warranty. With something like my old lime-green Audi S5, the risk involved in running past the manufacturer guarantee would be classified by an actuary somewhere between “BASE-jumping off the Freedom Tower” and “not checking under [REDACTED NAME OF AUTO INDUSTRY PROFESSIONAL]’s bed for a knife before drifting off to sleep next to her.” Somehow it doesn’t seem like that big of a deal with a Honda. I know they aren’t perfect, particularly not lately, but I do expect to turn the 100,000 mark on the odometer before I see a four-figure repair bill.

On the other hand, 2018 is likely to be the last year for a manual-transmission Accord powered by something besides a force-fed powder-puff four-banger. Maybe I should start thinking about the fact that trading in for what is essentially the same car does, in fact, confer the benefit of being able to shift my family car myself for an additional three or four years. It’s worth thinking about.

So feel free to keep e-mailing me, local Honda dealers. But you’re going to have to offer me something better than a five-grand blowoff. Make it a fair deal. The only way I’m gonna make a dealer five grand richer on any Accord-related transaction is if you paint the car that lovely lime green from the new Civic. What? You didn’t know that I like lime-green cars? Really, dear reader, what have you been doing with your time?

Get the latest TTAC e-Newsletter!

Recommended

100 Comments on “When Is a New Accord for $16,000 Not a Deal after All?...”


  • avatar
    White Shadow

    Wow, that’s something new to me. Too many assumptions on the dealer’s side to even consider the deal. Maybe 1 in 20 Accord owners would fit the requirements, and even then they’d have to be fools to fall for it.

    But I guess that doesn’t matter because it will generate buyer interest and eventually lead to some sales. Sort of like a loss-leader ad that is much more typical.

    • 0 avatar
      NormSV650

      Obviously they have his 2014’s value in the equation. But I don’t JB will be buying another Honda?

      • 0 avatar
        Kyree S. Williams

        Actually, in one of his earlier articles, he talked about continuing to use his current Accord Coupe V6 MT as a daily-driver and eventually passing it down to his son…while buying an identically-equipped new Accord Coupe V6 MT to baby and keep in pristine condition, since it’ll likely be the last V6 MT Accord version offered by Honda.

        And before you say that’s outlandish, remember, this is the man who owned two Volkswagen Phaetons *at the same time.*

    • 0 avatar
      dal20402

      Clearly the offer is tailored to him. I’m sure they’re just running through their database of existing owners to see if any will hand them $5000 in profit.

    • 0 avatar
      Fred

      I’m guessing you don’t read the fine print much? I’ve seen it from Chevy, Audi but not yet Acura. They will give me a $1000 loyalty credit on a new TLX, but that’s not much of an incintive to give up on a 35,000 mile TSX wagon.

  • avatar
    tedward

    You are such a tease. First the bertel story “so sorry not yet” and now redacted executive names after an in-bed snuff reference. Not fair at all.

  • avatar
    ferio252

    I noticed this in our church parking lot. Older crowd. Newest cars except I’d notice the same make and model.

  • avatar

    I will often look at the funny numbers in ads, and read the small print. After adjustment of the reading glasses, it always has something bizarre. My favorite is the “ultra low mileage lease”, where they assume you are just parking their car in your driveway for three years, and they are getting back a CPO with under 30k miles (and one oil change). Those are some expensive miles.

    My other favorite is a variant of this ad, where the fine print says $7500 down (on a 20K) car.

    Lot of folks don’t understand or don’t parse out the whole deal-

    Some radio car ads do this too, but with a processor that cuts silence out of the advert, so you get this in a strange too-fast auctioneer’s cant-I can’t listen and turn off the radio. I know why they do it-cuts 15 seconds of disclaimer into 5 seconds of air time…but you’ve just annoyed me and wasted whatever you paid to air.

    • 0 avatar
      S2k Chris

      Or the $35k balloon payment at the end of the financing term is another favorite.

    • 0 avatar
      indi500fan

      Here in Indiana we have some incredibly annoying high pressure dealer tv commercials (Don Hines Ford as an example).

      I think to myself, “I’d be annoyed just driving past this place”.

      Yet they must be effective because they stay in business using the same pitch for years.

      • 0 avatar
        JohnTaurus_3.0_AX4N

        Try Cape Coral Kia (Florida).

        A lot of Kia and other credit-challenged-pandering brands/dealers are bad, but I got so sick of them. It was truly awful.

        • 0 avatar
          NoGoYo

          I get at least 5 ads every day on the radio from the same local Kia dealer (Brown Daub Kia) and at least 3 from the same local Chevy dealer (Wind Gap Chevrolet).

          I’ve made a note not to ever visit these places.

          • 0 avatar
            Felix Hoenikker

            Those mofos pissed me off so much that I removed all the Lehigh Valley radio stations that air their ads from my presets. That leaves WMUH (local college station) and the local PBS station.

          • 0 avatar
            yankinwaoz

            Who listens to radio any more? I totally gave up on it years ago. Too much crap and recycling of old songs. Here in SoCal all they play on the radio is Prince. Weird.

            There are tons of wonderful free podcasts. Plus streaming music. Plus audio books from my library. I don’t waste my time in the car anymore listening to the same bad music of my youth sandwiched between hours of annoying ads.

          • 0 avatar
            WildcatMatt

            “Brown-Daub” is one of the most unfortunate names I can think of for a car dealership.

    • 0 avatar

      I’ve always loved the “buy one car, get one free!” deals, where you have to buy the car at sticker and the free car is a one-year low-mileage lease of a completely stripped turd.

      • 0 avatar
        JohnTaurus_3.0_AX4N

        A Ford dealer in Marysville Wa would do that with beater trade ins. But, you didn’t have to pay sticker IIRC, you could pick one if you bought a new vehicle from the lot or something.

        Neighbors boss got a new Econoline for work, got a free 1988 Aerostar that sh¡Г its transmission in a month lol. Neighbor had it rebuilt though and used it for a while to keep miles off his personal vehicle.

  • avatar
    Hoon Goon

    Sad thing is they probably had plenty of bites.

  • avatar
    shaker

    In a fair society, this would be considered “attempted fraud”, but as it is, even atheists can only hope that the perps will “burn in Hell” because there isn’t enough money in the world to go after all the fraudsters who mainly target older folks with crap like this.

    • 0 avatar
      ToddAtlasF1

      In a fair society, Mark Zuckerberg would be worried about going to prison for massive fraud because he lied to advertisers.

    • 0 avatar
      ajla

      I really do wish the government agencies and the sale websites (autotrader, cars.com, etc.) would do more to police this stuff.

    • 0 avatar
      Coopdeville

      Wait a minute, selling a car at MSRP and offering less than average trade-in value is now “fraud?”

      I’d better get my plaintiff’s suit dry cleaned, because people keep trying to sell me houses at above average market value and keep offering me less than market value for mine. I thought this was filed under “how the world works,” and wasn’t aware that I was being defrauded until just now.

      • 0 avatar
        shaker

        True, on Planet Trump, this type of activity would win awards.

      • 0 avatar
        SSJeep

        “Fraud” and “Inability to negotiate” are two very different things. Your Real Estate example is very germane – there are so many houses for sale around these parts that I wouldn’t pay within 20% of their asking price. But somehow they eventually sell to someone who “falls in love” with the granite on the counters, or the paint color, or something that has nothing to do with the true value of the real estate purchase. This is how house flippers make a living – slap some lipstick on a pig and sell it for double the price the flipper bought it for 3 months ago.

        Fraud? No. Inability to negotiate, do ones homework, and shop around? Absolutely. Car sales are no different other than a smaller dollar amount, but people sure seem to get their knickers in a twist when they overpay for the car… But strangely not when they overpay for the house.

        • 0 avatar
          Scoutdude

          You don’t overpay for a house you buy it too early. And of course that is part of the the reason some people are willing to overpay, because most of the time it will appreciate. A car on the other hand will almost always depreciate.

          • 0 avatar
            SSJeep

            I think quite a few people overpaid for a house between 2005 and 2007. Many markets have not returned to pre-recession levels. And there is a whole slew of housing stock built in the late 90s and early 2000s that is largely considered undesirable, but at the time cost quite a bit of money.

            Yes, many houses do appreciate but many depreciate as well. If incomes trend down and property tax trends up, a downward trend will resume.

  • avatar
    Zackman

    One way or the other, the house always wins, and, just as in fishing, there are many types of lures.

    If the deal sounds too good to be true, it ALWAYS is.

    Buyer beware, but suckers? Suffer. Unfortunately, those unwise to these tactics are generally the ones who can least afford it and are stuck with the bill of goods.

  • avatar
    TDIGuy

    Forget about just advertising a base model to get customers in the door. It is getting to the point where the advertised price means nothing.

    I have run across several used car dealers that advertise all their prices as including a $3000 trade. That way they can list lower prices, which means the web crawlers pick up the prices but not the conditions.

  • avatar
    FormerFF

    “But I’m not a Boomer and I don’t have a pension.”

    I am a Boomer, born in 1957, don’t have a pension, never worked for any organization that offered one to people who joined the company when I did. My wife was born in 1961, which puts her towards the end of the Boomer generation. She did have a pension during her 20’s, as she worked for a hospital operated by the Sisters of Mercy (the Catholic order, not the band fronted by Andrew Eldritch), but it was switched to a defined contribution plan in the early 90’s.

    There’s a big difference in the economic life experiences of Boomers, depending when they were born.

    • 0 avatar
      28-Cars-Later

      X with no retirement future, I am seriously contemplating moving abroad to a country which might exist in the next thirty five years.

      • 0 avatar
        PrincipalDan

        If Mexico get’s the cartels down to a low roar, I’ve heard that’s a pleasant place to retire.

        Of course that would likely require us to call off this massive waste of money we call a war on drugs…

        • 0 avatar
          Adam Tonge

          I’d say go even farther south. Peru, Ecuador, Chile, etc. No Columbia or Venezuela.

          • 0 avatar
            VoGo

            Argentina if you like steak and Malbec.
            Colombia is getting pretty safe and the women…
            Costa Rica is a safe choice

          • 0 avatar
            Adam Tonge

            I do like steak and Malbec.

            They are two of my favorite things.

          • 0 avatar

            My parents considered Panama for a while and went and checked it out for a few weeks. Decided they couldn’t leave family behind.

          • 0 avatar
            30-mile fetch

            Had a parent abandon Costa Rican retirement after trying to maintain a vaguely American standard of living in a place not quite equipped to provide it. Health care was an issue. So was the eccentric collection of new age expats swarming the area. The Costa Rican government also seems to be making it attractive to visit but a bit difficult to live in. Can’t blame them.

          • 0 avatar
            CoreyDL

            I hadn’t seen much of the scenery of Argentina until I watched that Top Gear special a year or two ago.

            Man what a beautiful place.

        • 0 avatar
          28-Cars-Later

          Was thinking Europe or Asia.

          “massive waste of money we call a war on drugs”

          What and not control both the models of problem and reaction? Heaven forbid.

          • 0 avatar
            raph

            Depending on how you feel about the viability of social security going forward you might want to check into countries where your benefits transfer if you make the jump before retirement age.

            I’ve got a little bit of money in my defined contribution plan and I’m well away from retirement age but jumping ship is an option I’m mulling long term since the probability of getting healthcare right in the US before they toss me into the clay borders on zero.

          • 0 avatar
            28-Cars-Later

            “where your benefits transfer”

            Interesting, I’ve never heard of such a thing. How does this work?

      • 0 avatar

        My old landlord was planning on retiring to Brazil. Bought a condo there, sold his house (in a down market, for about half what he would have gotten at the peak of the bubble)…. and then found out that Brazil had raised the amount of assets required to become a citizen.

        Last time I heard he was living in a friend’s basement.

    • 0 avatar

      I think pensions topped out around 60-70% of workers back in the 60’s-70’s now it’s well under 20% (looking it up some claim under 10%). Despite being a gen-x/millenial (35) I actually have a tiny one from a company I worked at for a while. It’s a cash pension thou so I just get an annuity form the balance when I retire. Most of the companies I have worked for don;t even match the 401 so really my retirement balance sucks so far.
      I was talking to relative the other day who’s closing in on 65. They have worked for the same company since the 70’s their pension was converted to a cash pension in 1989 but he does get a regular pension based on his first 10 years or so. He said it looks like he will get about 66% of what he gets from SS from that pension plus he has a cash pension (he didn’t say how much but I used to work there too and I guess he has around 130k in that. Plus he has a 401 K match and a stock plan. I’m guessing (despite his complaining he didn’t have a bigger pension) he will retire much better then I could ever hope too.

      • 0 avatar
        VTECV6NYC

        I’m a millennial (33) and I stand to get pensions from the states of IL and NY when I retire. The great majority of my colleagues at my current university are at least 18-30 years older than me and retiring frequently, so you’re right; pensions are a dying breed. My partner works in banking and makes quite a decent salary for the tri-state area, but will ultimately lack a pension. Savings-wise, I still put $$$ into deferred compensation, I have some $$$ invested in the markets, and I recently inherited an investment property in Brooklyn that we’re renovating. Given all of this and 12 years working in public service, retirement still seems like a gamble, although I’m somewhat hopeful that my partner and I can do so comfortably.

        • 0 avatar
          SSJeep

          I would most definitely not count on the pension from the Republic of Illinois. NY has some financial issues as well, but nowhere near as dire as IL. At worst, factor in your IL pension being taken over by PBGC and getting about 40% of the promised amount.

          If I were 33 and in your shoes, I would do exactly as you are with a market fund and deferred income pool, and sack as much as I could away into the market as a cushion.

  • avatar
    gasser

    I have repeated this mantra about car ads to my children until they can recite it in their sleep: “What the big print giveth, the small print taketh away.”

  • avatar
    Land Ark

    This is why I always promise people that I’ll buy their car for $500 more than the dealer offers. So many people I know just don’t want the hassle of trying to sell their cars they just fold like paper when the trade offer hits the desk.

    I test drove a Fusion Sport last week and the guy would not stop asking me about trading in my Legacy. Up front I said I wouldn’t be trading but I could tell he was salivating thinking about having a Subaru on the lot.

    • 0 avatar
      shaker

      “…salivating thinking about having a Subaru on the lot.”

      Especially at the beginning of autumn in the Northern Hemisphere…

    • 0 avatar
      krhodes1

      I’m lazy, but I am not lazy enough to gift a dealership $2-5K just to avoid having to clean my car, take pictures of it, and talk to some people. Or in the case of my last “trade”, take an afternoon to drive 2hrs to CarMax and take the train/bus home to get $2500 more than the dealer offered in trade. Timing was part of the issue that time, to private sell that car I would have had to register it again, which would have cost $500+. I figured I netted out at $500 loss to sell to CarMax, it was worth $500 to not have to deal with it. But not $2500.

      Actually, best deal I ever made was when I sold my ’79 Mercedes 300TD. I’d had my fun with it, wanted something different. was willing to pretty much give it away for $2000 or some such to make it go away. A friend who is just a really good salesman offered to sell it for me for 10% of the proceeds. Done deal, he sold the thing to some dude from OREGON for $5K in about three weeks. Best $500 I ever spent, my total contribution was signing the bill of sale and dropping it at the shippers. Sadly, that friend moved to Seattle last year.

  • avatar

    This is the same scenario I was presented with a few weeks ago. The wife and I have been thinking of trading her 2013 Enclave for another “SUV” (her description not mine). One day I walked into the house and she is reading a letter from the dealer stating that they have her new Yukon ready to go! Apparently our salesman had called to “check on her” and they discussed her desire for a slightly larger vehicle. How sweet of him, I think he also volunteers as a Scout Master and cooks food at the local shelter on weeknights.

    “You want to go look at them?” She said, her voice full of glee and her mind probably racing trying to figure out if she wanted tan or black interior leather.

    Me, I grabbed the letter. I skimmed over the body of the message and then found the fine print at the bottom (on the back of the page no less) written in what appeared to be .000004 point font. They even went so far as to print the micro-fine print in a lighter shade of ink. At first I thought it was a watermark placed there for security purposes.

    Sure enough, the deal consisted of us giving them the Enclave and a down payment of two bars of gold and a left testicle. This deal assumed that the Enclave was in perfect condition, had been driven less than 36,000 miles since purchase, and that the left testicle was in perfect working condition.

    Well the “SUV” is in pretty good shape, minus the usual minor scratches and rock chips one would get from driving Texas highways and driving through refinery construction sites. The mileage was long gone, I think last check she was just past 70,000. As for the testicle, well at the ripe old age of 39 I was able to produce enough product to create a set of beautiful twin girls. This could possibly be attributed to marrying a woman 12 years younger than myself, in addition to being able to get a good toe-hold.

    In any event, I told her to look at the fine print. Instantly she was enlightened and said, “They are screwing us!” Yep darling and not even a kiss on the cheek.

    The matter was resolved, and we both agreed to wait to trade for another couple of years. By then, the usable life (for us anyway) of the Enclave will be exhausted and there will be something newer and better on the lot that every professional mommy/Construction Manager will want to drive.

    Of course, this was before the headlight went out on the Enclave. Deciding against allowing the dealer to replace the unit for $400 per bulb, I said I would do it myself. Not realizing that sometime in the last 10 years GM decided to allow beings produced from the DNA of German Engineers and ObamaCare Architects design their vehicles.

    About four hours into the process of changing a headlight bulb, that Yukon deal was looking kinda nice.

    • 0 avatar
      PrincipalDan

      Reminds me I need to buy a taillight bulb for my wife’s Vibe…

      • 0 avatar
        Nick_515

        Get a headlight bulb too while at it Dan. I hear they go like clockwork every year. Thankfully our local pd always gives my friend a ticket which they dismiss when provided proof the headlight was replaced.

        • 0 avatar
          PrincipalDan

          Oh I’ve replaced the headlights more times than I can count in the 8 years I’ve known her. GM and their oh so wonderful DRL technology that burns out the low beam bulb before anything else.

          Toyota had adopted some of that tech pre LED but fortunately I can actually turn off the DRLs on my ‘Yoda.

          • 0 avatar
            JMII

            Our Volvo is on headlight bulb number 4 or 5 I believe. Yep like clock work ever year one side fails. Then 6 months later the other side fails. They are HID DRL which are stupid expensive and on all the time. Thankfully they are pretty easy to change and Amazon has Prime 2 day shipping. Now in them same time frame my Z has required zero bulbs… so clearly something is wrong with Volvo’s implementation of this technology.

    • 0 avatar
      28-Cars-Later

      Testicle futures have been trending downward this year, might be the time to cash one out before they lose further value.

      “this could possibly be attributed to marrying a woman 12 years younger than myself,”

      My hat is off to you sir. You remind me of future me.

      • 0 avatar
        PrincipalDan

        Reminds me of a 20 years older male colleague who commented on my marriage: “She’ll get older you know.”

        My retort: “Yeah but she’ll always be younger than me.”

      • 0 avatar

        I devalued them after the twins were born. Wife even drove me to the doctor. I go in, they stick a needle in my arm, I feel something cold on my nether regions; next thing I know, I am in bed at home with a double cheeseburger, fries and a Dr. Pepper. She was even kind enough to turn on Tombstone for me to watch.

        Not a bad day, all things considered.

        And yes, she will always be younger than me! It was sort of a selling point: “Look the way I live life just figure that I’ll kick the bucket early and you will be young enough to enjoy that pool-boy you can afford with the life insurance!”

        “Can we get a pool now?” She asked as she cleaned her .44 magnum…

    • 0 avatar
      DaPlugg

      Houston area? I agree with rock chips but you forgot love bugs

    • 0 avatar
      Weltron

      I had to change the headlight bulbs on my Outlook. Outside. In the middle of a Upper Peninsula winter. Aren’t they a pain?

      • 0 avatar
        gtemnykh

        The flip side of super easy to change headlights in certain locales is theft. I know in certain parts of Russia, Volvos are often targeted for headlight theft because it’s just two slide/pins to take out and the entire headlight pops off. That and the Haldex control module, which is a simple little box suspended under the car that can be taken off with ease and fetches a good price on the used parts market. Owners there have resorted to various modifications to prevent said thefts.

      • 0 avatar

        It was awful. Biggest POS bit of engineering I have seen in awhile. Dealer wanted $280 per bulb plus labor. I picked up the bulbs on Amazon for $72 each with some Prime shipping. I thought about removing the wheels but figured I could make do without it and just remove the wheel well lining. It was a pain but I finally got it off. Then the bulb was broken. So I ended up with a piece of the old bulb in the housing and good luck finding that.

        Finally got them both installed and that freaking piece was blocking the louvre from moving down to make low beam. I cussed it and beat the lens until something loosened. By then I could care less if I had broke something or not. She doesn’t use high beam that often anyway.

        Then I drank copious amounts of alcohol and celebrated my victory over the GM Engineer Demons.

        But this all occurred in a garage in Texas in September heat. I’ll take that any day over your winter weather. You are a better man than I am. I would have probably taped a couple of mag lights to the hood and waited for the thaw.

        • 0 avatar
          Weltron

          That’s what I ended up doing. I couldn’t believe that they thought that it was acceptable to have to remove the front bumper to replace bulbs. At least on the Equinox they give you a flap in the wheel well to do it. Why couldn’t they do that here baffles me.

          As to being a better man, I appreciate your kind words. My driver’s side bulb blew in January, so I had no choice. And I did it on one of the warm days too (14 degrees!) But then the driver’s side bulb was defective and blew again. Needless to say i’ve gotten pretty good at tearing apart the front fender liners…

  • avatar
    SCE to AUX

    I have a friend who’s ~$2000 upside down on her car, but needs a larger car for her growing family, AND can’t afford payments in the future.

    I’m going to recommend that she fold the loss into a car she can acquire without a payment. This will mean she’s getting an older car with more miles, and the dealer will have to pay off her loan using his profit from both transactions.

    This is not a good deal financially, except that she walks away payment-free. Does this make any sense?

    • 0 avatar
      VoGo

      No. That makes no sense. If you are $2K upside down and cannot afford payments, then you have no car and need to come up with $2K.

      You don’t get another, larger car for free.

    • 0 avatar
      yamahog

      Think about it like engineer – there’s a conservation of energy in a closed, isolated system, right?

      Now here’s the trick to deals in business – there’s a conservation of value.

      She has a car worth X
      She owes X+$2000

      So for the dealer to take the trade, they need to come up with $2000.

      Now maybe the dealer can get $Y for the car such that $Y > X+$2000

      But why would they? They can get cars at auction.

      Additionally, if you can solve this, call me up and we’ll start a used car dealer ship:

      $Y > $X + $2000 + car on the lot

      There’s no free lunch. Why would they take your friends car for $2000 over its value if they can pick up a similar car ‘at value’ at an auction?

    • 0 avatar
      30-mile fetch

      So she’d be looking at buying a vehicle priced at $2000 less than the trade-in value of her current car? In isolation, that makes sense to me but since she is looking to move up a size she may have to sacrifice a lot of mileage and age to do so. So much hinges on the price category her car is in. If it’s some rapidly depreciating midsizer worth 12 grand you could trade straight for 100K mile Kia Sedonas or Grand Caravans or Dodge Journeys. If she can’t afford payments I would be worried about unexpected repairs.

    • 0 avatar
      RHD

      Whatever you do, don’t let this lady balance your checkbook or do your income tax return.

      She’s the kind of person that in her retirement years could tell you about the subtle flavor differences between Whiskas, Purina and Friskies.

    • 0 avatar
      whitworth

      Not to kick someone when they’re down, but maybe a family shouldn’t be “growing” if they can’t scrape together $2,000?

      Also, there’s a big difference between needing something and wanting something. If you can’t even come up with a down payment for a loan to get rid of you already upside down old loan, it needs to be designated as “wanting” something.

  • avatar
    don1967

    Selling Nissans in the 1990s I had a sales manager who once dreamed up a “half price” sale event. Make a 50% down payment on any in-stock car, and then you could take it home for “half price” by paying the other 50%.

    His logic was to “just have fun with people”.

  • avatar
    tedward

    I may be completely wrong on this but I bet you don’t get another accord to replace this one. As awesome as the v6 manual accord is, and it’s a car I recommend to family members, I think your inner car guy will object to the same car twice in a row. Also, you write about your cars a lot, the stories are going to dry right up if you go for a repeat.

    It bothers me that I’ve got two golf family cars in my driveway and I love both of them. The only reason I’m probably going to end up in another sportwagen is the whole only stick shift wagon thing. I probably won’t replace my gti with another one, no matter how good it treats us.

    I don’t know, maybe that’s just my weirdo issue and I’m projecting.

  • avatar
    philadlj

    Speaking of Hondas, not sure if anyone else has caught a gander at the new Ridgeline spot, but I thought it was pretty fun:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zM2hVF7eiIs

  • avatar
    MrGrieves

    The local VW dealer is running TV spots offering $5000 off MSRP on all remaining 2016 Jettas and $6000 off MSRP on all remaining Passats. However, they are loading them up with all the VW accessories (Cargo Blocks w/ Trunk Mat, Roof Racks, Monster Floor Mats, etc.) which partially offsets the discount.

    FYI, the Cargo Blocks are nice when you need them, but an utter pain when you don’t. That Velcro could hold an elephant in place.

    • 0 avatar
      30-mile fetch

      Cargo blocks are *awesome*. There has been all kinds of crap that hasn’t slid or rolled or tipped in my car because of them. But yes, you reflexively curse the moment you inadvertently set one down in the wrong spot because that velcro means business.

      • 0 avatar
        Kyree S. Williams

        I had them on my Jetta SportWagen. I foolishly forgot to take them out when I traded that in for the Golf SportWagen (but somehow remembered to take the first-aid kit!). I miss them.

        I would not, however, buy them forcibly, and would negotiate them out of the purchase out of spite.

    • 0 avatar

      And they transfer from car to car if you aren’t compulsive about exact fits for the mat

  • avatar
    dal20402

    I’m paying $309 a month on my lease for a loaded C-Max Energi, which is about right given our 9.9% sales tax.

    The waste offer on the same car from the same dealer was $410, which they abandoned in an incredible hurry after I laughed at them. I guess… why not see if you can find a sucker or two?

    • 0 avatar
      Scoutdude

      Well there always is the risk that the customer will just get up and walk out as they laugh their way to the next dealer.

    • 0 avatar
      ajla

      The opening “waste offer” on my Charger was at sticker price on an 84 month loan at like 14% interest.

      I also laughed at it.

      • 0 avatar
        PrincipalDan

        Makes me think of my former in-laws who would be in the salesman’s office and ask for a few moments alone to consider the offer. After the salesman left they would call the dealer they had just visited (they tended to buy new and play Ford, against GM, against Dodge): “We’re sitting at the Ford Dealer and their offer is…”

    • 0 avatar
      30-mile fetch

      If this is what passes for tools of the trade, I don’t think I could make it as a car salesman. At the very least, I’d need a couple full flasks of courage from which to discretely take long pulls throughout the day.

      “Alright, gotta do some foursquare crap that will cost this guy $6K extra if he agrees. Hope he doesn’t notice!” *swig* “OK, here we go!”

      My predatory drive isn’t strong enough, my skin isn’t thick enough.

  • avatar
    mikey

    When I first retired , I gave serious thought to a second career in vehicle sales. I actually had I job lined up , at a non franchised lot.

    I took along hard look at the inventory on hand. Half of what I saw, was junk. The other half was way over priced.. This old guy was cursed, or blessed, with a social conscience . My career ended , before it started .

  • avatar
    krhodes1

    I’m surprised no one has pointed out the egregious interest rate on that offer, never mind the rest of the BS. You should be under 2% with any sort of decent credit at all these days. Certainly no more than 3%.

  • avatar
    whitworth

    I think even an asterisk in the fine print should not absolve someone of guilt when it comes to fraud.

    Any reasonable person looks at that and comes away with the same impression (besides being too good to be true if you’re a car person)

  • avatar
    taxman100

    Living in Central Ohio, one rumor on the street is 2017 is the last year for the 2 door Accord.

    I think the Genesis two door is dead as well.

  • avatar
    jeffzekas

    Hi Jack, i am one of those Boomers with a pension. I hate getting scammed by dealers, so i bring my 30 year old son with me. He is a salesman, which probably pisses off the dealer. But he knows when to talk and when to walk. Personally, i hate dealers, go to independent mechanics and buy four year old cars from private parties whenever possible. But sometimes, you just want a new car. My personal pet peeve is that all the current new cars have electronic, keyless doors or use expensive-to-replace chip enhanced keys. I believe Hyundai is the only company that sells old school simple metal keys… or am i wrong?


Back to TopLeave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Recent Comments

  • redapple: I leased a LR3 10 years ago. New car mind you. In the shop 3 times in the first year. So, I d think long...
  • ToddAtlasF1: Does anyone think a 2019 EV will be anything other than hilariously obsolete in six years? Either the...
  • Lie2me: I’m sorry Land Rover you may be the most elegant SUV on the planet, but if I need a “real”...
  • ToddAtlasF1: I’m pretty sure that all of the demand for Tesla vehicles is weak.
  • Fordson: Ancient GTI? The GTI selling today has the modular architecture – the first of its kind in 2015...

New Car Research

Get a Free Dealer Quote

Staff

  • Contributors

  • Timothy Cain, Canada
  • Matthew Guy, Canada
  • Ronnie Schreiber, United States
  • Bozi Tatarevic, United States
  • Chris Tonn, United States
  • Corey Lewis, United States
  • Mark Baruth, United States
  • Moderators

  • Adam Tonge, United States
  • Corey Lewis, United States