By on June 13, 2016


Let’s have some fun with this video featuring two narcissists whining at each other about the use of a cell phone in a stopped vehicle. It’s extra fun, because one of them is a cop!

As is always the case, I like to offer a little summary for those of you who don’t like to watch YouTube videos. I know you’re out there; I can hear you turning up the volume on Matlock.

  • A typical adventure bike rider is out riding his adventure bike on the freeway.
  • He pulls up behind a Ford Explorer at an intersection where he, and the Explorer, have a “Yield” sign.
  • At this point, the ADVRider suffers a classic narcissistic injury. The driver in the Explorer is on the phone! When he, the always-endangered rider of a wannabe dirt bike, is at risk from this distracted behavior! Never mind that the Explorer is ahead of him, completely stopped, and posing no threat to him whatsoever.
  • So the rider honks his horn, makes the “hang up” motion, and tells the driver to “get off the fuckin’ phone!”

Okay, let’s pause the action for a moment to reflect on what an utter and complete moron Mr. Adventure Rider is. He is knowingly confronting somebody who, in the time it would take to put the “Explorer” into “R” and press the accelerator pedal, could kill him stone dead. I don’t know this fellow from Adam, but based on the attitude he takes in what happens next, I strongly doubt that he would have done the same thing if the car ahead of him had been a ’78 Bonneville on 36-inch wheels containing two young male African-Americans. In other words, he’s the ADV rider Michael Bolton:

I’ve found that a good metric for whether you should yell at somebody in traffic is to ask yourself, “Would I do this if I was reasonably certain that the driver of the other vehicle was, in fact, Suge Knight?” If you’re agitated enough to scrap it out with the guy who threatened to kill Eazy-E’s momma, then by all means, have your drama, booboo.

Now, our rider knew perfectly well that it was not Suge Knight. It was some doofy-looking sub-six-foot dude with a polo shirt on. Except…

  • The door on the Explorer opens and THE POLICE gets out.
  • THE POLICE explains to the rider that honking at somebody is road rage.
  • THE POLICE says that it’s totally fine to be on the phone when a car’s not moving.
  • THE POLICE says he’s going to write all the tickets in the book.
  • The rider gets very breathless and squeaky and frightened.
  • To his credit, however, he does troll the cop a bit by saying “I’ll cede to your power.”
  • The rider eventually apologizes three or four times.
  • The cop decides to return to his important police phone call…
  • …which, to be fair, was not so important that he couldn’t walk away from it for six minutes so he could bully some dweeb adventure-bike rider.


What’s great about this video is, once again, we have two people sustaining injuries to their egos but nothing else. The motorcyclist is at zero risk from the Explorer. He just wants to safely bully some suburbanite for doing something that he, the rider, thinks is wrong. The cop, meanwhile, was absolutely free to ignore the rider — but to do so would be to ignore the challenge that the rider had made, however unknowingly, to his authority. So he stops traffic and loses his temper with a whole bunch of people just to put the rider in his place.

A local TV station in Denver reached out to the police for comment, who told the station there’d be no investigation of the officer despite the officer’s behavior in the video. So that tells you right there why the cop felt free to do what he did; because his department will stand behind his intimidating, bullying behavior.

You humble author’s two-point opinion:

  • The rider is a dickweed whose behavior makes the road more dangerous for other riders.
  • The cop is a dickweed whose behavior reduces public support for police and indirectly endangers fellow officers.

What a shame that both can’t be fired from their respective positions of “licensed motorcyclist” and “peace officer.” With that said, it’s worth noting that at least one cop out there recognizes “zero tolerance” distracted-driving laws for the miscarriages of legislature that they represent, right?

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65 Comments on “Colorado Policeman Doesn’t Like Being Called On His ‘Distracted Driving’...”

  • avatar

    Does anyone else think Explorer guy’s phone call was because he got confused by the yield sign and he couldn’t figure out the roundabout?

    (Adventure bike guy should have ridden up alongside and slapped his mirror closed… or brake checked him. Too soon?)

  • avatar

    I apply my ‘Mike Tyson rule’ when deciding whether or not to confront dickweeds: Would I do it if the dickweed was Mike Tyson? If the answer’s ‘no,’ then the potential confrontation is not worth it.

  • avatar

    The rider should have kept his mouth shut for all the reasons you mention, but also because it is like pissing in the wind. I see dozens of texters every single day in my multi-hour pleasure fest called commuting.

    The cop was being a classic d!ck as well, with the typical authoritarian attitude that curses too many officers these days. This is the stuff that makes ordinary people hate the police. If you have ever been the subject of such abuse, the anger it creates festers and it does not take too long to lose all respect for the police.

    The lives of the police are often considered “more worthy” then that of average citizens and the penalties associated with attacks on them reflect that. Fair enough as they may be put in harm’s way just for doing their job. However, this means they should also be held to a higher standard and be held accountable for their actions. The reasons why relationships with the police in this country are at an all time low are not surprising. Having been told “I’ll make you eat dirt” certainly did not make me love the cops. Fortunately I have a good friend who is an officer in Florida, and having spent a night on patrol with him was quite the eye opener..

  • avatar

    I need some popcorn so I can relax while watching these idiots getting the stuffing beaten out of them by the police.

  • avatar
    punkybrewstershubby aka Troy D.


    Look, the police have a job to do. If somebody pulled up next to you and pointed a gun at your face, who would most likely protect you, THE POLICE. Don’t fuck with the police, the next life they might be saving is your own. Don’t fuck with them, period.

    • 0 avatar

      Technically my Kimber .45 delivers justice faster than 9-1-1 response time.

    • 0 avatar

      @punky/Troy, watch the video again and re read Jack’s article again. Your points about the police are generally true and we should default to giving them the benefit of the doubt.

      Biker dude would certainly be wise to put more foresight into “choosing his battles.”

      BUT, back to this video it’s not apparent that Explorer dude is a cop until he steps out of his truck. Right up until then he seems to be just another cell phone yacker, devoting, ((ahem)) less than full attention to driving, cooperating with the efficient flow of traffic (instead of inhibiting it), and the safety of his fellow motorists. And the F ing job he has to F ing do is so important that he F ing puts the phone down for F ing six minutes to berate biker dude. The call also wasn’t urgent enough that he neither put on his lights and took off somewhere nor found a place to pull off to the side. So I’m not convinced that it was all that important. Period ;)

    • 0 avatar
      Dirty Dingus McGee

      “If somebody pulled up next to you and pointed a gun at your face, who would most likely protect you, THE POLICE”

      Yes, because when seconds count the police are only minutes away.

      When most police quit treating everyone like a “perp”,confiscating cash or prepaid cards when there is no crime, covering up for their fellow cops who break the law, perhaps they might someday start to regain some respect.

      CSB: A few years ago I was pulled over by the local PD. First I was told to turn off my truck and then step out. Any weapons? Pocket knife. Let me hold it. He then noticed my Leatherman and went off. WHAT ABOUT THAT? It’s a tool. Gotta have it also. After 15 minutes of this, and checking me thru various data bases, I was told that the reason for the stop was I didn’t have the sticker for the current year on my plate. Registration was valid, I had just forgot to put the sticker on. Because of this heinous crime, HE HAD MY FRIGGIN TRUCK TOWED.

      If I were to see him on fire, I wouldn’t piss on him to put out the fire.

      Respect is EARNED, not offered up to a badge.

    • 0 avatar

      You really think it’s “most likely” that you would be within view of the police in that situation?

      • 0 avatar

        “You really think it’s “most likely” that you would be within view of the police in that situation?”

        Even if I was, I sure hope it’s not someone like the cop from this video come to save me… but I do hope the bad guy would be someone like the bike dude from the video. Heh heh

    • 0 avatar

      Please. The cops are – on their best day – just a cleanup crew. They show up after you’ve been shot, maimed, or mugged to file paperwork.

      If they deem the crime you’re a victim of interesting enough, they might investigate. But most of the time, they’ve got some speed traps to operate or a starbucks to patrol.

      Cops sure as hell aren’t going to protect me from someone “pointing a gun at my face”.

  • avatar

    Bonus points for calling yourself the “Alpha and Omega” 90 seconds before saying to a cop, “I’ll cede to your power.”

  • avatar

    Ha ha, I just beeped at a guy diddling with his phone at a roundabout this morning. He was a middle aged white guy in an old 2 tone Trailblazer though, and I am, by appearance anyway, one of the “superpredators” JB keeps using as a reference point of physical harm.

    Some days I feel like literally everyone in cars around me is on the phone. Who are these people talking to at 6:30 AM?

    • 0 avatar

      They’re talking to anyone that will listen. Life is brutal and we’re all gonna die alone – unless you’re on a falling airliner or in some kind of multi-vehicle accident. Ergo, constant phone interaction. Something’s got to distract us from the unyielding truth of our inescapable mortality.

    • 0 avatar

      I call this anecdote “Profiles in Courage”

      In a small but dangerous southern city I was behind a car as one of the “superpredators” walked in front of the guy in front of me when we had a green light, so I honked. The pedestrian just ignored me, however after we made our turn the super beta stopped in the middle of the road to get out of his car and yell at me for honking at him. I am not a badass, but I did literally laugh in his face.

  • avatar

    Another quality cop making other cops look bad.

  • avatar
    Arthur Dailey

    Late 70’s, driving my girlfriend north on Yonge Stree which was then Toronto’s main drag. Two lanes each way, I am in the outside lane.

    Suddenly a car pulls right out in front of me from the inside lane, without signalling. I hit the binders and blast the horn. It pulls back into the inside lane and as I pull beside, hit the horn again.

    It then pulls up behind me, turns on the siren and flashing lines. Unmarked police vehicle.

    Two plain clothes officers get out. Tell me the first horn blast was my right. The 2nd was disrespectful. They write me up for not wearing a seatbelt. No ticket to the young lady beside me.

    I take it to court. Neither of them show up. Case dismissed.

    They just had to ensure that any spectators realized you cannot publicly disrespect the Department.

  • avatar

    That’s a pretty good summary there. I think the basic issue here with police feeling the need to respond to slights is that they lose sight of the impact that their response has on people. Your average law abiding citizen on the receiving end of a dressing down is faced with an armed assailant that they can’t legally defend themselves against and who can financially ruin them on a whim. This is a huge deal, and the end effect is basically the same thing as casually beating a dog. That dog is looking to bark if not bite in future encounters (with gotcha footage, lawsuits, heckling etc). This is exactly the dynamic between younger guys and the nypd right now, the copwatch thing didn’t spring from a vacuum.

    Citizens should probably also understand that the vast majority of people that even the most hot headed officer intimidates absolutely deserve it. It’s an underpaid job where everyone is always pissed off at you. The job is literally to ruin people’s days, but it is a necessary job and we should understand it leaves a mark on them. I wish more people would attempt to deescalate themselves instead of just running with their own fantasy narrative that all cps are a$$holes or whatever.

    • 0 avatar
      Arthur Dailey

      ‘tedward’ agree just do not call policing ‘underpaid’. Here in Toronto the majority of Toronto Police Services earn over $100k annually. Plus a defined benefits pension and benefits.

      A tough job and one that is generally done well, by well meaning officers. But not underpaid.

    • 0 avatar

      “Citizens should probably also understand that the vast majority of people that even the most hot headed officer intimidates absolutely deserve it.”

      Erm. No. People do not “deserve” to be intimidated by someone who has more power than they do. The police do not “deserve” to be treated with respect. Criminals deserve punishment, and law enforcement deserves the ability to enforce the law. “With great power comes great responsibility” is an old trope, but its intrinsic truth is something that people understand, and it seems that as police power has grown ever larger, police responsibility/accountability for that power has shrunk. They can empty my bank accounts without cause, it seems, and they also drive their cars too fast and cause deadly crashes, or shoot unarmed people whose looks they don’t like. If the officers involved were fired and prosecuted, we’d all say, “That was a bad cop.” But because they’re not, it looks like the behavior is sanctioned, and also like all the other cops are being told, “Do what you want. There aren’t any consequences.” And that’s where the narrative fantasy that all cops are @$$holes comes from.

      • 0 avatar

        And to what smartascii said, which I fully agree with, I would add, LEOs are there to make sure that any violation of law is adjudicated properly through the judiciary (with all its strengths and weaknesses), not to get an ego boost, or teach anyone a lesson, or to cover up for the brootherhood.

        Part of their primary and utmost duty is the rights of every citizen, and police protecting every person’s right to dignity and freedom. Most cops are unable to articulate the notion that they are there to advocate for the constitutional rights of the citizens, and that they have no more a right to an easily bruised ego than the average citizen.

        Cops in general seem to use far more of their legally sanctioned authority on even the most mundane interactions or to escalate at even the slightest hint that their full authority may be questioned. That cop on the video is completely freestyling on what is and isn’t legal, and completely out of line when injecting camera subpoenas, tickets etc. And that whole notion that he was conducted in police business is bull. He could have very well forgotten his lunch on the way to work and called his mommy to ask her to drop it off for him. The union he will hide behind will stand up for him and absolutely back him up that arranging for his forgotten lunch was police business.

        In most civilized countries around the world there is rigorous review of police interactions on citizens. I’ve travelled to many countries and the actual power differential between citizens and police here in the US is much closer to that of many countries we all consider corrupt. Then again we are a much more violent country.

        Arthur, I am very much afraid that Toronto and Canada more generally is not in exactly that same ballpark as police forces south of you. I lived in Toronto for several years but maybe things are different now?

    • 0 avatar

      Cops are not “underpaid”. That’s a myth. The average cop makes well over what the average civilian does, with eye-watering benefits and jobs security.

      The cops around me make between $70-100 grand a year, plus gold plated benefits I could only dream of. They also get to play with their big boy cop toys and harass civilians all day – a big plus to the infantile types attracted to police work.

      The reason people are “pissed” at them is that they act like jack booted thugs, instead of respectful civil servants. It’s the COPS job to “de-escalate” a situation. They’re literally being paid to be the adults in the room.

      If cops want more respect, they can go earn it. The starting point for earning it is to out the members of their own crew that are complete jackasses.

      As long as the ‘thin blue line’ holds, my respect for all involved is zero.

  • avatar

    The bike enthusiast is a poor judge of other vehicles. That black trim on the back and matching lift gate handle would have immediately told me it was a PD vehicle, and not Jim Thomas on the way home from Intertrode.

    Bike wanker is wank.

  • avatar

    Also I admired Michael Bolton for making the more obscure choice of the Vision over the Intrepid.

  • avatar

    More proof that no one polices the police, and the badge and gun goes to their god like image of themselves.

  • avatar

    While I agree, the motorcycle rider should pick his battles, I have extreme issues with the policeman in this video. Not just impeding traffic, and bothering the citizenry. He cited Colorado law, that when the motorcycle rider honked his horn, that it was road rage. It was not. Colorado law states road rage is, ‘Sounding the vehicle’s horn or flashing lights excessively”. One beep and a put down the phone motion is not excessive.

    I had a similar incident happen to me. I came upon two policemen parked going in different directions talking to each other. They were oblivious to me, and I sat there for a minute or two waiting patiently. I may have been yelling at the end, but it was within a closed vehicle, and my windows were up. I didn’t honk or anything. One of them decided my yelling was out of bounds, though. He pulled me over and harassed me for 5 minutes… because I was yelling in my car. Now he gave the same excuse we see in the video, I was doing something important. In his case, they were talking about a missing child. Great, it was so important, you had to harass me for 5 minutes, after blocking the road for at least 2 minutes for no reason.

    tl;dr Sometimes cops suck.

  • avatar

    I’m starting to get through to my 9 year old daughter that the feeling she doesn’t like of being bullied is the other side of jumping up loud every time you see someone breaking what you think of as a rule. I’m betting she’ll have it down before she turns 11. These 2 and so many like them… that ship has sailed, and it’s not my job to correct their deficient upbringing.

  • avatar

    “THE POLICE says that it’s totally fine to be on the phone when a car’s not moving.”

    Except that it isn’t. Exceptions to the law include reporting an emergency and use while the vehicle is parked. Being stopped at a yield sign is not an exception.

    There may be a general exception to law enforcement needing to require with the vehicle code generally while driving if it is for the job, so the content of the call may have provided an exception to the law. But it would be wrong to argue that sitting at a stop or yield sign isn’t “driving” or “operating a vehicle.”

    • 0 avatar
      Firestorm 500

      It is. The driver is on a public street or highway. In the driver’s seat. Engine running.

      I have seen videos on “COPS” where an intoxicated driver is arrested for DWI when sitting/sleeping in his car in a parking lot with the engine off.

      • 0 avatar

        I think the general threshold is engine stopped and parked. So shutting off the engine while waiting at a traffic light, or idling while parked are considered driving.

        I am not sure how that works with an electric car though. From the outside there is no indication that the car is turned on.

        Police usually have some exemptions while on duty, but as we all know that is probably the one area where even great police forces cannot do a good enough job to enforce it. We’ve all seen cops who are clearly talking or texting while driving.

    • 0 avatar

      In my state police are exempt for texting and talking while driving laws as are ambulance and tow truck drivers.

  • avatar

    I met great cops, professional, and sensible. This is definitely not one of them. He has issues handling all the power conferred to him by the badge.

    Great cops understand their power to make their number one objective to deescalate a situation. This guy makes it all about him and his “police business” somehow justifying his distracted driving.

    His behavior is a dead giveaway, he has no grounds, and threatens (ticket, subpoena) but he just drives away. He is clearly MUCH more concerned about being recorded and perhaps that is why this chat doesn’t continue in a court.

    I find all these poorly trained and loosely supervised cops who must assert their authority in EVERY interaction with the public to be quite cowardly. It would be a whole different story if they did that without a police union to hide behind when video proof of their poor policing skills is made public.

    JB makes entirely wrong conclusions, perhaps on purpose to polarize and create more comments and traffic. Not your finest moment TTAC.

  • avatar

    Telling on-duty police officers that they have to obey the law just like everyone else will, at best, elicit the kind of fake politeness and feigned respect cops radiate when they want to show you how little they think of you. At worst it will get you hassled.

    I’ve was once chased and pulled over by a Huntington Woods, Michigan cop who took exception to me telling him, through his open side window when I was stopped at a light next to him while he was parked in a left turn lane waiting for people to make the illegal right turn on red that his superiors want people to do for revenue purposes, that he was dangerously and illegally parked.

    From the perspective of a regular driver, cops think that breaking traffic and parking laws is a perk of the job. It seems to me the cops aren’t the only ones with the attitude that the law is for the governed to follow while public employees and politicians get a pass for stuff that would put us in the joint.

    While writing about the Michigan law that governs how emergency vehicles are allowed to be driven, I spoke to the media relations officer for the Oakland County Sheriff’s Dept and his understanding of the law (MCL 257.603) was exactly opposite the plain sense meaning of the words.

    • 0 avatar

      Lol HWPD. Huntington Woods has to pull in more revenue because they are giving 1/3 of it to Oak Park every time they write a ticket. Plus we have to pay for some of the weird expenses Huntington Woods has incurred over the last few years (owning the abandoned party store on 11 Mile, the Coolidge construction lawsuit fiasco, etc).

    • 0 avatar

      “At worst it will get you hassled.” I respectfully disagree. At worst, it will get you killed.

  • avatar

    My last traffic stop, the visibly angry cop’s parting speech was that I cannot speed up and slow down while driving. This was after the officer had pulled up and tailgated me at the speed limit on an empty multi-lane highway at night twice. Both times I gently slowed down, ultimately to about ten mph under to encourage them to go around, mistaking them for a drunk and or confused tourist. I got flashing blue and red lights and a tirade instead.
    What is it with Colorado LEOs?

  • avatar

    I’ve just realized the only time I’ve ever received tickets, I was behind the wheel of an Audi. I don’t think police figures in the Midwest like Audis.

    Every other time, I get a smile and a “Okay, slow down and enjoy your day!”

  • avatar

    Wait ~ Matlock is still on the air ? .
    Did anyone ever watch it anyway ? .
    I tell Cops ‘ how the hell am I supposed to teach a houseful of Teenage Foster Boys to respect the Law when they don’t ? .
    They don’t like it much but even the hot headed l.a. sheriffs (a poorly trained over the top cowboy LWO outfit if ever one existed) don’t impound my vehicle (that’s 1,000% CHICKENSHIT) nor write me tickets , they just do that same old waste my time a while then leave in a huff .
    Agreed , not enough effort is put into policing the Police .
    They have a miserable , thankless job but_they_ chose it so I expect them to act accordingly , better than everyone else .

    EDIT : I meet good and bad attitude Cops every where I go and I try to travel a lot .

  • avatar
    makarov380 …. just say’n

  • avatar

    Meh, loggers and roofers and taxi drivers have a statistically much more dangerous jobs than cops.

    They never seem to feel the need to go on public rants about how brave they are an how lucky we are to have them and how they need to be treated special because everybody is out to kill them and how their work is *serious business* that requires them to be immune to normal rules.

    Even just considering the likelihood of being murdered on the job rather than killed by accident cabbies are still at more than 2x the risk of cops. They still don’t ask for special treatment.

  • avatar

    This is NOT a case of two equal dickweeds. The Cop has a badge and a gun and both the authority and the ability to instantly deprive you of your liberty on the spot. He should be held to a higher standard. Using that badge just to be a belligerent bully is wholly reprehensible.

  • avatar

    Sadly, this is par for the course.

    In an age of everyone having a video camera on them and public pension funds around the country imploding, it would probably be a smart strategy for police officers to always appear to take the high road in petty situations like this.

    But I’m not holding my breath.

  • avatar

    What’s the law about phones in Colorado?

    Where I am it’s illegal to touch a phone if you’re in control of a vehicle. Calls can be made if it’s entirely hands free (i.e. voice command), but you can’t remove a hand from the wheel to manipulate a phone.

  • avatar
    Chris from Cali

    He should’ve trial-biked over the Explorer. Wuss.

  • avatar

    Frankly, I don’t see what the biker did to escalate this.

    He comes up on a roundabout; and there’s a doofus who can’t figure out how to enter the circle. WHILE he’s yap-yap-yappin’ on his phone. Blocking traffic; and apparently what he’s hearing/saying on the phone has taken him away from his immediate task.

    A horn toot is, if not appropriate, not outside reasonable behavior.

    Now a cop comes out. Is he in a police car? NO. Until he stepped out there was no way of KNOWING he was a cop. Moreover, his decision to stop in the single, curbed-in lane of traffic, instead of pulling over a few feet past the circle…is about as stupid a decision as can be made.

    THEN his threats against the biker. Can we say “Badge-Heavy,” boys and girls?

    AND his complaints about the rider STANDING UP. Rider is exactly right – standing up is the legal, appropriate and intelligent way to get over railroad tracks or chewed-up areas without getting bounced off his seat.

    The threat of a ticket. Fine…ticket meet complaint and lawsuit. Escalating the situation? Maybe. Seems Mister Policeman was spraying plenty of gasoline himself.

    It was 20 years ago I left Colorado. I can see there’s been changes, and not good changes. This guy has NO BUSINESS being a cop; and if he’s that burned out, and that early in his career…it’s time for another job or a psychiatric disability pension.

    And FWIW, I am not down on cops. They have a tremendous responsibility and I’m ready to cut them some slack. But not this time…this individual was WAY over the line. He was blocking traffic, using his cellphone in traffic…is that legal in Colorado?…and then ready to lash out.

    At worst, he could have stepped out and shaken his fist and gone on his way.

    • 0 avatar

      I quite agree.

    • 0 avatar

      I completely agree!
      Doing your job or not, cell phone usage is dangerous. I could be doing “my job” on the phone in a life/death situation that still doesn’t justify the cell phone usage and not paying attention to the road…

      Biker stopped at stop signs, from the sound of it he didn’t speed either, I was even like “is that a lawnmower”.
      Also he was very reasonable in his explanation and kept his calm in his defense against the angry cop.

      too much ego and power given to some cops…

  • avatar

    I agree with Jack’s assessment – both were at fault. You make good point JPT. The thing that bugged me the most was the cop and his non-stop, hell no I’m not goin’ to listen to anything you say attitude. The cyclist should have exercised restraint in his reaction to the stopped vehicle in front of him. The cop should have shut up long enough to listen to the cyclist’s explanation and apology. He certainly could have gotten out of the lane of travel so other motorists could have passed safely and continued. In fact both of them should have taken the pissing match to the side of the road – not in the middle of it.

  • avatar

    Shocking, another video from a dick on a bike seat.

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