Sausage Fight! Decadent Daimler Shareholders Tangle in Bratwurst Brouhaha

Steph Willems
by Steph Willems
sausage fight decadent daimler shareholders tangle in bratwurst brouhaha

Sometimes, stereotypes exist for a reason.

Things got heated yesterday at a Daimler AG shareholders meeting in Germany, where a fight broke out over lengthy, plump sausages, Bloomberg has reported.

This, despite the fact the lucky shareholders were told they’d be receiving the biggest dividend in the company’s history — 3.25 euros ($3.70) per share. You’d think the windfall would have tempered flare-ups, but you’d be wrong.

Daimler had budgeted for 12,500 bratwursts to feed the 5,500 people at the buffet-style luncheon. If math isn’t your strong suit, that works out to two sausages and a tip for each shareholder.

One shareholder thought he could take off with a pile of the encased meat tubes, and police had to be called after a pissed off (and likely very hungry) female shareholder got into a verbal altercation with him. This is how regional wars begin.

Apparently, there were also big pretzels available at the buffet, the kind you eat with a napkin while holding a little container of mustard in your other hand. At this time, we can’t confirm rumors that the shareholders arrived at the meeting in dirigibles and autogyros.

After the sausage tensions simmered down, Daimler chairman Manfred Bischoff remarked, “Either we need more sausages, or we’ll have to get rid of the sausages entirely.”

Anyone who knows the joy of receiving free sausages can bet there’s now a “don’t invite” notice next to that one shareholder’s name.

[Image: cyclonebill/ Flickr ( CC BY-SA 2.0)]

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13 of 58 comments
  • Shaker Shaker on Apr 07, 2016

    Snobs + Sausages = Snausages!

    • See 2 previous
    • Corey Lewis Corey Lewis on Apr 07, 2016

      @Lorenzo Indeed, nobody comes away squeaky clean from this one.

  • 06V66speed 06V66speed on Apr 07, 2016

    When North Carolina finally gets its automotive manufacturing base, we'll all be reading up on the fight that broke out when investors didn't get enough Livermush.

    • See 1 previous
    • Hummer Hummer on Apr 07, 2016

      @sportyaccordy McCrory is doing a fine job he's the first governor in a long time that isn't lining up to go to jail for being a crook. I've been very happy with his leadership, we've needed this for a long time. It's nice not having someone from the "Good ole boys club" "running" operation.

  • Badreligion702 Badreligion702 on Apr 07, 2016

    Who in their right mind would slather ketchup on an otherwise delicious looking bratwurst?

    • See 1 previous
    • Badreligion702 Badreligion702 on Apr 07, 2016

      @ktm If so, I stand corrected. I assume it is like currywurst?

  • APaGttH APaGttH on Apr 07, 2016

    Lil' Hitler, what's wrong? I will need the Polish boy's sausages.

    • See 1 previous
    • APaGttH APaGttH on Apr 07, 2016

      @shaker Lil' Hitler, where is the Polish kid. I don't know, but I'll be needing the Czechoslovakian kid's sausage also.