Sausage Fight! Decadent Daimler Shareholders Tangle in Bratwurst Brouhaha


Sometimes, stereotypes exist for a reason.
Things got heated yesterday at a Daimler AG shareholders meeting in Germany, where a fight broke out over lengthy, plump sausages, Bloomberg has reported.
This, despite the fact the lucky shareholders were told they’d be receiving the biggest dividend in the company’s history — 3.25 euros ($3.70) per share. You’d think the windfall would have tempered flare-ups, but you’d be wrong.
One shareholder thought he could take off with a pile of the encased meat tubes, and police had to be called after a pissed off (and likely very hungry) female shareholder got into a verbal altercation with him. This is how regional wars begin.
Apparently, there were also big pretzels available at the buffet, the kind you eat with a napkin while holding a little container of mustard in your other hand. At this time, we can’t confirm rumors that the shareholders arrived at the meeting in dirigibles and autogyros.
After the sausage tensions simmered down, Daimler chairman Manfred Bischoff remarked, “Either we need more sausages, or we’ll have to get rid of the sausages entirely.”
Anyone who knows the joy of receiving free sausages can bet there’s now a “don’t invite” notice next to that one shareholder’s name.
[Image: cyclonebill/ Flickr ( CC BY-SA 2.0)]
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Snobs + Sausages = Snausages!
When North Carolina finally gets its automotive manufacturing base, we'll all be reading up on the fight that broke out when investors didn't get enough Livermush.
Who in their right mind would slather ketchup on an otherwise delicious looking bratwurst?
Lil' Hitler, what's wrong? I will need the Polish boy's sausages.