By on April 25, 2013

Everybody’s talking about abuse of police power nowadays, but what are you doing about it?

If the answer is not “crush eight cop cars with your tractor then drive away”, you’re not doing as much as Roger Pion.

Edited to congratulate the B&B and to add information

It might be going too far to call the thirty-four-year-old pot-smoker a “great American”, but there’s something of the Founding Fathers in the man. After being arrested for marijuana possession, Mr. Pion made bail, went home, got in a tractor, returned to the police station, and dispensed a little justice of his own. He crushed all the police vehicles in the lot in a maneuver described as “monster truck rodeo” by spectators. The best, I mean worst, part? The police were unable to pursue him because all their vehicles had been crushed. Presumably they had nobody on staff who could run as quickly as a large tractor can drive.

Nobody knows where Pion got the tractor, which makes the whole incident even more surreal. There were no injuries, although given that Panthers are no longer in production it would seem reasonable to charge the man with crimes against automotive enthusiasm and irreplaceable full-size sedans. Not that they’re exactly short on things with which to charge him; his list of violations includes “leaving the scene of an accident”. That seems like a stretch, since there was nothing accidental about his behavior.

Mr. Pion comes off as a character out of Dickens or, more appropriately, Melville. It must have taken him a long time to drive to the police station. All that time, his mind must have been firmly fixed on revenge. For taking his weed. For keeping him away from the newest episode of “Game Of Thrones”. It’s hard to say. But in an era where most Generation-Xers can’t even complete a juice cleanse, there’s something to be said for that kind of moxie.

Maybe the country should have a Kickstarter to buy new police cruisers.

And a tractor-proof fence to put around them.

I’d received this story from a reader who hadn’t noticed that the date of the story was 2012, not 2013, and I was so busy laughing I didn’t check the date either. The B&B, on the other hand, immediately caught me.

So… what’s Roger Pion been up to in the past year? Well, he received donations for legal assistance from “around the world”. In response, the county decided to involuntarily commit him for unspecified “mental issues”. He was found incompetent to stand trial in January and further committed for treatment. The case is set for review.

In the meantime, the local sheriff has sued his family, since Mr. Pion turns out to have borrowed his father’s tractor to cause the mayhem. I guess he forgot all about the library like he told his old man now. The Pions are contesting the case.

More on this non-breaking story as it happens. In the meantime, check out the tribute Facebook page — JB

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29 Comments on “Rock Beats Scissors, But Tractor Beats Cop Cars (With More Info)...”

  • avatar

    This ‘little guy fights back’ story is almost 9 months old.

  • avatar

    The idea of him driving miles on a tractor to exact his revenge has me thinking of Ken and the steamroller from A Fish Called Wanda.

  • avatar

    Yeah, this happened almost a year ago. Vermonters (of which I count myself one) laughed… hard. 0 respect for the Sheriff’s Offices. Bunch of hacks basically

    All the respect in the world for VSP.

  • avatar

    If marijuana was legal none of this would have happened.

  • avatar

    He is 34? Looks more like 64! If that isn’t motivation enough to stay away from drugs, I dont know what is. By looking at the fleet, which seem very old, I am guessing this police dept doesn’t have a lot of money to begin with. It is sad to see a dept barely getting by loose so many valuable cars. Mr Pion is def. not in a position to pay them back for the damage caused.

  • avatar

    Maybe we need Mr. Pion to crush the police cars of corrupt speed trap towns like Kiowa, OK. A town of 600 plus people and over $460,000 in traffic fines.

  • avatar

    The losers here are the taxpayers. It’s not as if these cops aren’t going to have cars a month from now, courtesy of you an me.

    • 0 avatar

      So if we as the taxpayers condone this type of action, that would make it kinda like our own personal monster truck rally, no?

    • 0 avatar

      Well, the taxpayers and the mentally incompetent guy’s dad. Imagine the legal bills he’s going to rack up fighting the sheriff trying to recoup the price for all those destroyed cop cars.

      The county’s lawyers will probably base their case on the father not properly securing the tractor so his deranged son couldn’t take off with it to perform his mayhem.

    • 0 avatar

      Insurance holders, not tax payers.

      • 0 avatar

        Taxpayers pay the premiums, which I’m sure are going to go up.

        But on a side note, does insurance cover this kind of thing? I think insurance excludes acts of terrorism and war, but not sure if this falls under that. Or looking at it another way, I don’t think there’s such thing as auto insurance for damanges at the track while racing (not HPDE).

  • avatar


  • avatar
    DC Bruce

    Well, good stories bear repeating. While it’s been decades since I drove a farm tractor, my experience was that they have a “road gear” which is good for 20 -25 mph, faster than just about anyone can run.

    Actually, the guy is pretty lucky to be alive. Farm tractors can easily lift off their front wheels and flip, killing the driver, if there’s nothing attached to them in the rear. So, jumping over a bunch of cars without killing himself was not as easy as you might think . . . or maybe that was his intent . . . and it failed.

    • 0 avatar

      Well, he’s not THAT lucky if he’s been involuntarily committed for “unspecified mental issues”, a term without an expiration date. Everybody’s heard about those Vermont Gulags, so that’s bad news. They’re probably making him watch the farm report on TV until he’s sick of hearing the price of butternut squash, and feeding him pancakes with no syrup, with a bottle of Vermont Maple Syrup just out of reach. He probably would have been better off if he’d anonymously phoned in a claim that the local donut shop’s donuts were poisoned.

    • 0 avatar

      Diesels can up to about 30 MPH in their highest gear.

      But some older small tractors use a gasoline engine. They can get up to 50-60 MPH in the higher gears. If one should be so brave.

  • avatar

    OK, this has been irritating me for a while: what model is (well, was) that gray Ford in this story’s photo? It definitely isn’t a Panther or a Taurus.

    Edit: After looking at some other photos with alternative angles of the destruction, it’s a Windstar. From the front, the poor thing doesn’t even look like a van anymore.

  • avatar

    This is what should be done to red light cameras. Some of that equipment is on dedicated poles and pushing them over would not damage the traffic control equipment.

  • avatar

    “In response, the county decided to involuntarily commit him for unspecified “mental issues”. He was found incompetent to stand trial in January and further committed for treatment.”

    Debtor’s prison. Can’t get out to earn money, so continually defaults on the debt. Rinse and repeat until death. Common until the 1850s until there were enough edjumacated folks to realize, hey this makes no sense.

    So they go after the relatives instead. Same kind of medieval logic. Because, y’know, a 34 year old man is only 13 years into his age of majority, so it must be the relatives’ fault. Rage, rage. I’m the damn sheriff here!

  • avatar

    I’m surprised they didn’t confiscate the tractor and then sell it. That MX255 would bring anywhere from 90 to 125 grand which would cover at least half of the bill on their cruisers. Then again these boobs probably aren’t smart enough to figure this out.

  • avatar

    Stupid. Who has actually gained from his running over the cop cars? The cops get insurance and taxpayers to pay for shiny new cars. Pion is incarcerated indefinitely and his family may have to pay damages. Vermont still has a law against pot possession, and the cops will still enforce it.

    Why didn’t he make legalization his cause, or move to Colorado or Washington?

  • avatar

    It might have happened a year ago, but still amusing to read. I wonder how far he had to drive that thing? And how about the conversation he must have had: “Um, Dad, I need to borrow the tractor…” “Why?” “Um, my car broke down…”

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