Ke$ha's Gold Trans Am is a Metaphor For Her T—What?

Ronnie Schreiber
by Ronnie Schreiber

Editor’s note: This article contains a discussion of organs. Not those in churches, more the ones found between legs. If this offends you, please don’t exercise your right to click-through. If you click through, please don’t complain that you found a story about private parts instead of car parts. If you do express outrage, we will understand that this was for the benefit of the moral police at your workplace or home.

I’m approaching an age when one is more likely to be thinking about hip replacements than about hip hop or being hip, so I’m not really sure who Ke$ha is. I presume she’s a musician or singer or rapper of some kind because she apparently writes songs, one of them about her gold Trans Am and at The Truth About Cars we can dig songs about cars. Well, she says it’s about her Gold Trans Am, but in reality, it is about her ladyparts.


If you don’t believe me, click on that YouTube link while at work and later you can tell us all about your meeting with HR – it is definitely rated Not Safe For Work. (On second thought, our technical team assures us that it can be viewed with “Safe” settings on at YouTube. YoiuTube must be going down the YouTubes.) Considering that one of the most common automotive cliches one will see or hear is that men drive big cars or sports cars or SUVs or whatever to “compensate” for some kind of anatomical or sexual “shortcoming”, I find Ke$ha’s recent comments to Q magazine rather humorous.

[Gold Trans Am] began as a song about my car, which is a gold Trans Am, and it works about 40 per cent of the time. I don’t have another car because I love that one so much. But then like all great pop it became a metaphor for something else – my pu**y. But my vagina is in tip top working order. Valeted and souped-up and working 100 per cent of the time …

I was in seventh grade once too, so the jokes practically write themselves. Is her “Trans Am” the High Output version? Has it been bored and stroked? What’s the displacement? Does it come with a blower? Is there a factory approved lubricant or is it lubed for life? I’m sure the Best and Brightest can come up with your own. Tire tracks all across her back indeed.

Now I’m not saying that no man has ever written a song ostensibly about a car but actually with salacious intent (or non-automotive songs with salacious intent). I’m pretty sure that Ike Turner offered a backup singer or two a ride on his Rocket 88, and that’s considered to be the first rock ‘n roll song ever. I’m also pretty sure that if the lead vocalist of some cock-rockish band today said that “this song is about my d*ck”, most folks would just laugh at him, just like Zappa did 40 years ago when mocking B’wana Dik’s “Harley”.

Discuss among yourselves. I’m going to go watch some Archer reruns.

Ronnie Schreiber edits Cars In Depth, a realistic perspective on cars & car culture and the original 3D car site. If you found this post worthwhile, you can dig deeper at Cars In Depth. If the 3D thing freaks you out, don’t worry, all the photo and video players in use at the site have mono options. Thanks for reading – RJS


Ronnie Schreiber
Ronnie Schreiber

Ronnie Schreiber edits Cars In Depth, the original 3D car site.

More by Ronnie Schreiber

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  • MadHungarian MadHungarian on Mar 03, 2013

    It's obviously time for that popular car face-off, Gold Trans Am vs. Little Red Corvette . . .

  • Domestic Hearse Domestic Hearse on Mar 04, 2013

    I prefer the original Trans Am tease girl, the Flying Nun in tight jeans, piloted around by a rogue with a big, fuzzy mustache and a wry, knowing grin. She was so off-limits, so carnally wrong, yet that's what made it so good, and why the car was black with a phallus-meets-vulva sticker on the hood. Huh? I'm dating myself? Sorry.

    • Raph Raph on Mar 04, 2013

      Jackie Gleason was the best part of that movie

  • Mikey My late wife loved Mustangs ..We alway rented one while travelling . GM blood vetoed me purchasing one . 3 years after retirement bought an 08 rag top, followed by a 15 EB Hard top, In 18 i bought a low low mileage 05 GT rag with a stick.. The car had not been properly stored. That led to rodent issues !! Electrical nightmare. Lots of bucks !! The stick wasn't kind to my aging knees.. The 05 went to a long term dedicated Mustang guy. He loves it .. Today my garage tenant is a sweet 19 Camaro RS rag 6yl Auto. I just might take it out of hibernation this weekend. The Mustang will always hold a place in my heart.. Kudos to Ford for keeping it alive . I refuse to refer to the fake one by that storied name .
  • Ajla On the Mach-E, I still don't like it but my understanding is that it helps allow Ford to continue offering a V8 in the Mustang and F-150. Considering Dodge and Ram jumped off a cliff into 6-cylinder land there's probably some credibility to that story.
  • Ajla If I was Ford I would just troll Stellantis at all times.
  • Ronin It's one thing to stay tried and true to loyal past customers; you'll ensure a stream of revenue from your installed base- maybe every several years or so.It's another to attract net-new customers, who are dazzled by so many other attractive offerings that have more cargo capacity than that high-floored 4-Runner bed, and are not so scrunched in scrunchy front seats.Like with the FJ Cruiser: don't bother to update it, thereby saving money while explaining customers like it that way, all the way into oblivion. Not recognizing some customers like to actually have right rear visibility in their SUVs.
  • MaintenanceCosts It's not a Benz or a Jag / it's a 5-0 with a rag /And I don't wanna brag / but I could never be stag
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