America's 10 Most Manly Motor Machines

Bertel Schmitt
by Bertel Schmitt
america s 10 most manly motor machines

“What to call these?” tweeted “Dudemobiles? Guy Cars? Testosteroners?” And they linked to their scientifically prepared list of the cars with the most men as buyers. Not a list compiled by basement dwellers, but by Polk. The list reflects total purchases made in 2011. And we are counting down …

Number 10: Chevrolet Corvette. 86.9 percent males. Pictured above. At number 10, it practically counts as a girl car on this manly list.

Number 9: Ford F-Series. 87.0 percent males. Only number 9? F as in effeminate?
Number 8: GMC Sierra. 87.5 percent males. Now scientifically proven, more manly than a Ford truck.
Number 7: Nissan GT-R. 87.9 percent males. Carlos Ghosn drives one. That skews the stats.
Number 6: Porsche 911. 88.2 percent males. Because skirts ride up in these cars – German ingenuity.
Number 5: Ferrari California. 88.4 percent males. Driving one grows hair on your chest.
Number 4: Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG. 90.0 percent males. Even looks like a … guy.
Number 3: Audi R8. 91.4 percent males. This stat will drive Sindelfingen boinkers.
Number 2: BMW 1 Series M Coupe. 92.2 percent males. This stat causes uproar in Munich: “An Einser? Whats wrong with our Sexer?”

And the winner is:

Number 1: Ferrari 458 Italia. 95.3 percent males. Cazzo!

(Can someone open the window? It smells like a locker room.)

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2 of 64 comments
  • DenverMike DenverMike on Apr 03, 2012

    I could be a douche or you could be envious but the truth is no doubt in the middle somewhere. Although the more you move away from Toyonda appliances, towards anything interesting or fun, the closer you move to douchehood. It's just the way it works. I went from muscle cars to pretty pickup trucks so I'm used to sideways glares from dudes in moving Maytags and really I love it! Muscle cars in the traditional sense, are but a footnote in history, but you can still get a brand new full-size pickup with a huge V8 (relatively), limited slip 3.73 or 4.10 gear sets, vinyl floors & seats, crank windows and a plain ass radio... the way God intended!

  • SunnyvaleCA SunnyvaleCA on Apr 04, 2012

    Seems like a somewhat arbitrary list. For example, the 1M was counted as a vehicle separate from the other 1-series vehicles but I'll bet the Porsche Carrera GT3 RSR, if not lumped in with the regular Carreras, would be mighty high on the list. And I'm surprised the Viper and Lamborghini didn't get a mention either.

  • Oberkanone The Chrysler - Plymouth - Dodge Neon's racing successes - SCCA and elsewhere ( racing.
  • Kwik_Shift My brother inherited his work travel 2013 Ford Escape 1.6L EcoBoost to be replaced with a 2019. Right its a beater vehicle to take my mother out for shopping/appts, etc.Right now it has 420,000 (HWY) kms still on original engine/turbo/transmission. Impressive, but doesn't mean I'd intentionally buy any Ford EB combination vehicle. I've heard lots of bad things as well.
  • Analoggrotto You forgot something.
  • MKizzy We can pretty much agree at this point that all Ford ecoboost engines regardless of displacement are of trash quality.
  • Jeff71960 once a fun fast little car (if you can find an unmolested one)... unfortunately boy racer types trashed most of them