Wild Ass Rumor of the Week: Pontiac Dies Next Week

Facing its worst financial outlook in more than a decade, General Motors outlined a new product development and sales strategy Thursday, saying that from now on Chevrolet and Cadillac would be the company’s only brands to offer a full lineup of vehicles. Sorry. My bad. That’s a quote lifted from a May 2005 New York Times story about GM. It’s only taken The General, what? Four years to almost make it so? Oh, and $20+ billion worth of American taxpayer’s money. Anyway, today’s report of Pontiac’s incipient demise hails from Automotive News [AN, sub], which confirms Edmunds’ Inside Line‘s, uh, inside line. Bloomberg’s in too. GM says no. Well, shudduppayourface. “Contrary to media speculation, General Motors has not announced any changes to its long-term viability plan or to the future status of any of its brands. GM is continuing to review its restructuring plan to go further and faster and best ensure its future success. Additional information will be released as any decisions are finalized.”

In fact, Pontiac’s death isn’t interesting in and of itself. The real story here is the timing and its implications. AN says “the announcement will be made as part of an updated viability report to the US auto task force.” So it’s what? A sacrificial lamb? Don’t fire us! We really are trying. Or maybe it’s justification for some new move from the Presidential Task Force on Automobiles, ahead of Chrysler’s April 30 drop-deadline. Whatever happens, it looks like ex-Car Czar Bob Lutz’s 2005 pronouncement that Pontiac was a “damaged brand” (immediately spun and rescinded) was strangely prescient. OK, not so strange. And not so prescient. But correct. Next up: Buick?