Wild Ass Rumor(s) Of The Day: Business As Usual Edition

by Edward Niedermeyer

November 11th, 2008 4:05 PM

wild ass rumor s of the day business as usual edition

These are indeed turbulent times in the automotive industry. With every new day comes a flood of bad news, and a fresh sense of ominous momentum. As we continue to serve up hefty sides of bailout beef, we thought we’d offer up a quick, palate-cleansing taste of the non-bailout, non-industry-implosion gossip going ’round the net. And you’ll never believe what insiders have to say about the Toyobaru coupe pregnancy scare!

Tabloid sweetheart, the Toyobaru coupe tops todays scuttlebut. Despite having already been dubbed several Brangelina-esque nicknames by the motor press, we now hear that it will be sold in the US as the 2011 Scion tC. I still like Toyobaru. Let’s still call it that. Anyway, Carscoop has a rendering of what it probably won’t look like, but as they say, an RWD tC plus the iQ means Scion will be kicking ass in 2011. Or at least barely competing with Kia’s Soul and Koupe. OMG, I am such a bitch!

Speaking of bitchyness, we hear that the Lexus “dedicated” hybrid (whatever that means) will be bland and uninteresting. I mean, it’s the Lexus version of the new Prius… what did you expect? Pictures from Japanese buff book Mag-X surfaced at the VWVortex forums, and everyone’s falling asleep chattering away about it. Oh yeah, there’s also a pic in there of what they swear is the new Camry too. Looks like an Avalon with some Accord influences. Thrilling stuff!

Oh yeah, Motor Trend also thinks Toyota will bring a Prius coupe stateside. Unless it’s on the Toyobaru RWD platform, they can keep it. I’ll have the CR-Z, thanks.

Want a really manly car? That Nissan GTR is for pansies, so wait and save up for the GTR Spec V that eGMCartech says will be unveiled by the end of November. And it’s brilliant. In the sense that gaining 100 hp and losing 200 lbs means you’ll pay at least $153,625 for it. But you’ll be the fastest douchebag ’round the ‘ring… and best friends with Nissan marketing. Until Nissan brings out the GTR LM (Les Mans), anyway. Then you’ll just be another pansy in the second-best GTR out there.

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2 of 23 comments

BlueBrat on Nov 12, 2008
I’m beginning to think it’s Scion’s mission to create a car company where all the different model-owners hate one another. Wait, your saying they failed at their marketing goal?

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JuniorMint on Nov 13, 2008
Wait, your saying they failed at their marketing goal? You laugh at that commercial, but xB1 people really are like that. I can't tell you how many conversations I've had in parking lots with someone who started out with an identical xB but took it in a completely different direction than I did. The last one had the same tails, but different fogs and rims. Of couuuuuurse, the NEW xB is only driven by 50-somethings, who traded in the Explorer now that the kids are out of school...so there went that. If we really DO get the iQ, and the new tC doesn't bring in a whole pile of insane Subaru owners (think the tC crowd can't get any stupider? think again), we'll be just fine. but, all kidding aside, one more dog car could kill this brand.

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