TTAC's Ten Worst Automobiles Today (TWAT) Award: The Polls Are Now Open!

Frank Williams
by Frank Williams

The Truth About Cars (TTAC) TWAT Award Selection Committee has convened. Fifteen members of our cadre of car critics and commentators carefully considered the full horror of your 131 nominations. They then selected 20 vehicles that deserve your consideration for the final 10 winners/losers. And so, now, we turn to you, our avid devotees and unshakeable critics, for your knowledge, passion, honesty and sarcasm. It’s time to VOTE for the ten vehicles which will be anointed TTAC’s top TWATs for 2006.

As you may have noticed during the nomination process, some vehicles practically dripped with TWAT-iness, bobbing to the top of the toilet bowl and staying there for the duration. Many of these execrable rides made it all the way to the top 20. Others kept a fairly low profile, but were decreed fully TWAT-worthy by my esteemed colleagues. The list of finalists shows that bad taste, poor design and questionable construction know no price, market segment or country of origin. So without further ado, here are the 20 finalists, listed in alphabetical order:

Buick Rendezvous

Cadillac Escalade

Chevrolet Aveo

Chevrolet Cobalt / Pontiac G5 / Saturn Ion

Chevrolet Impala

Chevrolet Monte Carlo

Chrysler Aspen

Chysler Crossfire

Ford Ranger / Mazda B-series

GM Minivans

Hummer H2

Infiniti QX56

Jaguar X-type

Jeep Commander

Jeep Compass

Lincoln Mark LT

Lincoln Navigator

Saab 9-7x

Subaru B9 Tribeca

Subaru Baja

Selecting 10 of these worst of all possible vehicles from such an undistinguished list will be tough. How do you decide which cars are the crème de la crap? To help you separate the chaff from the toxic waste, here are some factors to consider when voting. [Fair Disclosure: we’re providing this guide simply to give the award gravitas amongst any media spies who may be monitoring our efforts.]

Market segment suitability/competitiveness Is it a badly badge-engineered bodge born to placate greedy, boneheaded dealers looking to sell something, anything in a particular market? Does it live up to the claims of the marketing goons? (Then again, can anything?) Is there any justification whatsoever for its existence?

Reliability/Safety Has it been recalled more times than a favorite fairy tale? Does it have a reputation (anecdotal or statistical) for dying (perhaps of shame)? Would you put your loved ones in one of them for a cross-country trip, assuming you're not planning on collecting on the insurance?

Build quality How does the overall quality of construction, fit and finish compare with other vehicles in the same price class/market segment or, say, a Walmart sofa? Does the vehicle rattle, thrum, drum and hum so much you could dance the conga to its beat?

Quality of materials How do the materials used compare with other vehicles in the same price class or, say, a K-Mart suit? How well do the controls work? Is there obvious cost-cutting everywhere you look or touch? Can you look or touch it without puking?

Styling When you look at the vehicle, do you feel yourself slowly turning to stone? Could it be a useful tool for interrogators at Guantanamo Bay?

Performance/handling How well do the acceleration, handling, fuel economy, and drivability compare to other vehicles in the same price class/market segment or, say, one of those rolling tables teachers use for overhead projectors?

Design How well does the vehicle’s overall design (interior, ergonomics, exterior styling, space utilization, visibility) work? Is it an exercise in wretched excess or a paean to bad taste? Is it a modern design or does it hearken back to ye olde days of crapteryear?

Desirability How would you feel about owning this vehicle? Would you rather walk/watch The Wiggles than be seen behind the wheel? If a rental agent handed you the keys, would you consider it an insult?

Je ne sais quoi Does the vehicle have that certain “something” that makes you throw up in your mouth a little when you see one drive by? Should it be sent to the crusher on general principles?

Yada, yada, yada. It’s time to vote for your TWAT. Click here and you’ll link through to the polling site. Again, vote for ten choices from the list. Once you’ve made your choices, you’ll be magically returned to the TTAC home page. Obviously, your votes will be held in the strictest confidence and tabulated with mindless electronic impartiality. You are, of course, invited to list your choices below with a short explanation of your decision making process.

The poll will be online through next Wednesday evening. We’ll announce the winners (losers?) on Monday. Thanks you for your help in this important experiment in journalistic freedom and, let’s face it, payback.

Frank Williams
Frank Williams

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  • Artsy5347 Artsy5347 on Nov 03, 2006

    Oops - posted this in the wrong place. Robert - I think you should strike while the iron is hot and do the 10 worst cars of all time. TWCAT. It doesn’t have that naughty, “heh heh, he said TWAT, heh heh” ring to it, but it would set up a battle roayl between Audi 100LS, Chevy Vega, Triumph Stag, Renault Le Car et al. LET’S DO IT!!!!!

  • Ar-Pharazon Ar-Pharazon on Nov 06, 2006

    foobeca, your logic is flawed. HP in part influences the top speed a vehicle can achieve, but torque determines how quickly it can get going. This in turn determines the driveability. Using your example, we can also include 800 ft-lbs at 1500RPM. You find me one single person on this site who'd choose 150 ft-lbs/8000rpm over 800 ft-lbs/1500rpm and I'll eat my hat.

  • 3-On-The-Tree I’m sure they are good vehicles but you can’t base that on who is buying them. Land Rovers, Bentley’ are bought by Robin Leaches’s “The Rich and Famous” but they have terrible reliability.
  • SCE to AUX The fix sounds like a bandaid. Kia's not going to address the defective shaft assemblies because it's hard and expensive - not cool.
  • Analoggrotto I am sick and tired of every little Hyundai Kia Genesis flaw being blown out of proportion. Why doesn't TTAC talk about the Tundra iForce Max problems, Toyota V35A engine problems or the Lexus 500H Hybrid problems? Here's why: education. Most of America is illiterate, as are the people who bash Hyundai Kia Genesis. Surveys conducted by credible sources have observed a high concentration of Hyundai Kia Genesis models at elite ivy league universities, you know those places where students earn degrees which earn more than $100K per year? Get with the program TTAC.
  • Analoggrotto NoooooooO!
  • Ted “the model is going to be almost 4 inches longer and 2 inches wider than its predecessor”Size matters. In this case there is 6” too much.
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