We know, we know — you’re torn on the answer to this age-old question. Well, Toyota thinks its 2020 Corolla sedan, which adopts the platform and powertrain changes seen on the 2019 hatch, is hot, sizzling stuff. And you will, too, it seems.
So much so, you’re liable to engage in a lewd public act, possibly encouraging a visit from the cops.
Allow this writer to suggest that it’s downright gross when automakers go there in their ads. The suggestion of sex — the promise of it — is a mainstay in automotive marketing, but things get cheap and unseamly when the actual act is implied, especially when it takes place in the car. Recall Corey’s takedown of Volkswagen’s “sex car” commercial.
No, the copulation is supposed to take place off-screen, perhaps in a low-end motor lodge two blocks from the beach.
Nevertheless, Toyota’s new ad push for the 2020 Corolla includes a spot titled “Rainy Day,” in which we see the employees of an automated car wash look on with shock and disgust as a new Corolla sedan rolls down the line, its flanks gratuitously slathered in suds, jets of foam splashing everywhere. In one scene, there’s a hint of shadowy movement in the backseat. Just a trace, mind you.
As the now-spotless sedan reaches the exit doors, we see two young(er) heterosexual adults hopping — fully clothed, mind you — into the front seat after a sordid backseat fling. Call me a prude, but no one wants to see, or think about, this particular couple going at it in the backseat of their significantly upgraded TNGA-platform sedan. If only those detergents could wash away their sins.
Yes, Toyota’s 2020 Corolla spots all highlight people in different stages of life (I clicked on the “Metalhead” ad expecting a take on the horrifically disturbing Black Mirror episode of the same name, but alas…), and many people, young and old, do use their vehicles for making whoopee. And yet I have questions.
For one, the vehicle displays no vertical or lateral movement as it rolls down the line. You’d think we’d see the sedan’s new multi-link rear suspension getting a workout, and yet it moves forward with all the steadiness of a curling stone on ice. Then there’s the issue of space and time.
How long does it take to make it through a car wash? Depending on the treatment selected, the duration could be anywhere from 4 to 8 minutes, with most washes falling into the middle ground. To order to complete their lewd act, this couple would have had to enter the wash, strip, scramble into the backseat, do their thing, shake hands, get dressed simultaneously in the fairly cramped confines of a compact car’s backseat, then hop back into the front seat, all in five to seven minutes.
Seems unlikely, unless this guy has an unflattering nickname his partner never says to his face. Also — that “Dirty>Clean” message? Ewwww.
At least Toyota included a “Do not attempt” disclaimer, though the overwhelming carnal desire felt by this model’s eventual owners might override any sense of common decency, no doubt leading to further tawdry escapades.
All of this this to say that, despite it being a topic everyone thinks about (all the time, too), sex and cars don’t mix well in commercials, unless it’s the promise of future sex. People want to know that, once they drive off the lot in that new Corolla, complete strangers will throw themselves in front of it for a chance to take you home. This ad just looks like a bored Millennial couple desperately trying to rekindle some of that original spark … perhaps to no avail.
[Images: Toyota]
“I’m too sexy for Milan, New York, and Japaaaaan.”
I don’t know, making out while going through the tunnel of love style car washes was something I did as a teenager, and bucket seats were not that conducive to it.
Whew! Talk about a Quickie! Don’t think even I’m that short-winded… especially when fully dressed!
Watch the bit when they show the “couple” climbing forward between the seats (time stamp :17). In fact, it’s just her there, in her white shirt.
Probably because the man wouldn’t fit in that small area to climb up front. There’s only one person in the back of that Corolla.
I must assume then that this was all a fantasy, and she’s very much alone.
LOL…and all four hours of “Once Upon A Time In America” were dreamed up by Robert DeNiro’s character as he got stoned in an opium den…
“I must assume then that this was all a fantasy, and she’s very much alone.”
Yea, that guy is way too handsome for her.
Back home to her cats, Harry Potter subreddit, and Shins records.
OUCH
SHADE…
Spot on. Corollas don’t exactly ooze sex appeal, regardless of Toyotas delusional marketing. Maybe if nerdy, frumpy, frugal and practical turn you on, I guess. But multiple cats, escapist fantasy novels etc are NOT my bag, and neither are the types of women who revel in such things, sooooo….
?!? How can you _say_ such a thing ? .
“Bodice Rippers” are the best example of serious Literature there is ! just look at the cover illustrations for God’s sake .
(/sarc./)
-Nate
Alone? Is there a 12v port back there?
I promise that I will not attempt this.
Amazingly low class .
Not getting live in a vehicle of course, the using it to sell them .
-Nate
Also I’d like to review the VW ad from before, but they took it off their channel. I wonder why.
One suspects that advertising is very much like sex in one way: think about it logically a little too hard and the magic disappears.
…and the girl is the driver, of course! In the #metoo era, it is no longer okay for they guy to be in charge of anything anymore. Such krap….
Girls, believe me, you don’t really want or need kunty guys in your life. You want a man who drives a stick shift, who can actually change a flat tire by himself, and who will marry you and take care of you when you are pregnant and for ever after.
Wow, someone’s triggered.
Get off my lawn too!
Okay, grandpa.
Get of my lawn !!!!
It’s a Toyota people…….they were just playing an enthusiastic game of Yahtzee.
OK, so here’s what happened: these guys spent the last 45 minutes making out, and desperately sought a place to…ahem…complete things.
Nothing sexy about a Toyota :=)
Its a Toyota, the conclusion about what was going on in the back seat is wrong. Obviously they were doing drugs in order to enter another mental dimension where they thought their Corolla was a Ferrari. People need help dealing day to day with….owning a Corolla!
obviously a fantasy. ive never seen a car wash open in so cal on a rainy day