Brighten Your Wednesday With a Glimpse of Glorious K-Car America

Hump Day can be a drag, but nothing puts a smile on the faces of hard-working Americans like value-laden Chrysler Corporation compacts and telling OPEC to go screw themselves.

While diving deep into the YouTube wormhole the other day, a promotional music video for the 1981 Plymouth Reliant and Dodge Aries twins reared its patriotic head.

It needs to be shared.

“K Car Superstar” is the song you need to feel good about life again. Three-and-a-half minutes long, it’s a halcyon portrayal of the Lee Iacocca and Ronald Reagan era, featuring upbeat and carefully coiffed Americans heading out to make the best purchase of their lives.

It’s morning in America, see, and the K Cars are here. And not just the K Cars — the future is here, too.

Little Bobby waves to the driver of the (General Motors) big rig that’s shipping the gleaming Ks to Anytown, U.S.A., while Linda and Jim (these names are guesswork) sip Sanka while reading the front-page news of the vehicle’s arrival.

One lady, who we’ll call Carol, even takes public transit (for the last time) to get to the dealership!

The floundering Chrysler Corp. hadn’t make its K Car jackpot yet, so it’s understandable that some of the pop-country song’s lines don’t seem to rhyme. You gotta buy what you can afford, which was essentially the pitch for the K Car itself. The video does make up for the horrible lyrics with exceptional hair, both on men and women. It’s strange how curly/wavy hair is completely gone from the over-30 male crowd these days.

The message of “K Car Superstar” is this: if you can handle having good personal grooming habits and a positive outlook on life, you could be Dodge (Aries) material.