Many, many years ago, I had after shaves from Aramis and other expensive sounding French companies on my bathroom shelf. My agency had the account for a (now defunct) men’s series called “Care.” The ads always showed a naked man. I was not invited to work on the stuff and wrote about sexy things like double wishbones and overhead camshafts instead. I must have dreamt all that. Because today, Daimler sent me an email, announcing that they just launched “The first fragrance for men.” Not “their” first fragrance for men. “The” first fragrance for men.
It’s called “Mercedes-Benz Perfume” and, so we are told, it “has been composed by renowned perfumer Olivier Cresp (Firmenich).” It also “combines woody notes with floral freshness.”
Having been trained in sometimes tortured German logic, I thought: “Aha. Maybe they admit that it’s actually a perfume for guys. And they don’t hide it as and aftershave.” But no. Says the press release:
“’Mercedes Benz Perfume. The first fragrance for men’ has been created in partnership with the INCC Group and it will be available from selected specialist retailers from the first quarter of 2012, as an eau de toilette, after shave, deodorant and shower and body gel.”
So much for German logic.
And here is the kicker:
“The world of fragrance is not new to Mercedes-Benz: the company already offers exclusively developed perfumes for the atomisers in its Maybach models and in the Mercedes-Benz S 600 Pullman.”
Man, am I confused. And boy, am I glad that my Japanese wife asked me to even stop using the old Old Spice deodorant stick, “because the other guys on the Tokyo subway will think you are a fairy.”
Wouldn’t a true Mercedes “fragrance for men” have to smell like our resident MB Dealership Mechanic MBella?
It should smell like a sun-baked MBTex interior.
Beat me to it–“30-year-old MBTex” was my first thought.
I’m sort of hoping the next iteration of this will be “W123”, with hints of deteriorating rubber parts, sweaty MBTex, and a hint of diesel exhaust.
That’s excellent. Thanks for the chuckle, Bertel. I actually needed that.
I prefer British Leyland-branded fragrance for men: that special combination of vinyl and motor oil, with just a subtle hint of burning electrical insulation.
They say that the sense of smell is wired more directly into the brain than any of the other senses. Have you ever noticed how a certain odor transports you to some other place (and I don’t mean the taco stand). Just the mention of the BL scent transports me back to our old TR-3A. Add in a little gasoline from leaky float bowls and dry, cracked fuel lines and you have it nailed.
Absolutely. My dad’s malaise Camaros had a very similar smell as well. I’m absolutely not joking when I say I prefer it to any perfume or cologne. It’s wrapped in so many warm and fuzzy memories.
Whew…
For a minute, I thought you’d been bought by Autoblog and that the next postings would be about Ferrari branded kiddie backpacks, this week’s tuner Mustang, the stars of Cars Meets Transformers 4 (“Lightning McQueen, give me your Face!”), and this Christmas’ Automoblox run (same as last year, only in different pastels!)
I bought my stepbrother the “Hummer”-branded cologne some years back. It was a pretty good fragrance, actually.
I can’t see M-B owners buying this, though. Swag related to your car is great and I have a lot of it, but such an intimate item would be weird. (I guess I can’t put that to the test unless Mazda comes up with a “Zoom-Zoom” aftershave.) M-B wishers might dig this product, though, assuming M-B wishers still exist.
“intimate item”
What’s next, Ferrari coming out with a line of vibrators marketed as having the precise harmonics of a flatplane 8?
In leiu of Ferrari vibrators, why not use instead the BMW remote control book?
Another market for Diamler to attempt to conquer.
uber-luxury (see Maybach) …lost
volume (see Diamler-Chrysler)…lost
economy (see Smart)…lost
Good luck.
Trying to crush the 3 series’ dominance…lost.
Why do they bother chasing volume when they’re as big as GM while only selling 1/8 the vehichles?
This perfume will probably be required wear for Mercedes-Benz salespeople and service writers.
God I hope not…some of my co-workers smell like French whores as it is.
Rubberized horsehair seat padding is the key.
Old VWs used it, too. Replicate that smell, and the naming is appropriate.
They could offer two versions: Leather and MB-Tex.
Does it conform to MB 229.51 or MB 229.5 specs?
WD-40 is the first fragrance for men!
I love the smell of burnt clutch in the morning.
Why would this be considered a joke?
Do you think this is funny?
Honestly, after years of development, research and testings, it has been determined that this is a market which can be profitable for Mercedes-Benz.
Back in 1984.
Judging by a purely visual random survey attained regionally,
it should probably smell like bankruptcy lawyer/semi-employed-realtor pit-squeezins.
I’ll definitely have to try this is a smaller size is available, most cologne sites offer crack-vial sized samplers as well.
I really like some automanufacturer’s colognes, such as Jaguar which smells of a freshly mowed lawn. I also really like Porche’s cologne which I discovered in a review on this site.
Some nasty ones have been the Cadillac cologne (I own a CTS so this was required, it’s awful), and Corvette Black (ugh).
Those Gee M colognes probably have the Essence of Arrogance from the Gods of Mt. Deludedia.
I still prefer the smell of burning melamine (I didn’t know it was made into dinner plates until recently.)