Ask Bark Brief: Talk Me Out of the Lexus I Want

Mike writes:

If you were shopping for a reliable, full featured, cheap to own, and generally “good” car, why would you not get a Lexus? I’ve been struggling with this question for the better part of a year now.

The problem: I need a car I’ll drive every single day in God-awful urban traffic. There’s little to no fun had behind the wheel in congestion. No using the sporting personality of whatever machine I’m operating. The only reasons I want a Lexus are for the comfort and peace of mind that come with one, along with working AC and a great stereo that’ll truly brings out the subtleties in Jad Abumrad’s diphthongs. Since I can’t afford nor really want a brand new car, I’ve been looking at used.

I’m really trying to decide why I shouldn’t just get a 2008-ish Lexus IS350 and call it a day. Maybe because I can’t decide between the IS and the GS, as if a bit more space and a few more features wouldn’t be a bad thing, right? (And the upgraded Mark Levinson system, of course.) Let’s set sights on the previous-generation Lexus GS350. (The LS is out of my price range, and I’m also not feeling that old just yet.)

I’ve read reviews of the mid-size RWD luxury cars when they were new. All the comparisons put the 5 Series, E-Class, A6, and even the XF ahead of the tarted up Toyota. But 10 years on, is steering feel worth more than “will never break” or “won’t cost you $200 for each labor hour when it does break because all cars eventually break”?

Talk me out of this. And don’t argue “it’s a boring old man’s car,” because I really don’t care. I’m friggin 41. I am an old man. Moreover, I estimate that of the 10 to 12 hours I spend in the car each week, 90 percent of it will be at an average speed below 20 mph, although there are often times the GS350’s 0-60 sprint capabilities would very much come in handy.

Besides, I have enough “not boring” with my project Alfa GTV6. Even when it’s broken, which is often, it’s exciting. So there.

I’ve come to bury the Lexus GS, not to praise it. You want me to talk you out of a GS? Pssshhh. No problem.

First things first. I’m the rillest. No, wait, sorry, where was I? Oh yes, the GS. The easiest way to talk you out of a GS or an IS is to realize that the Lexus you want is actually the LS.

All the things you say you want in a Lexus are available in exponentially higher quantities in the LS than in the GS. Comfortable ride in traffic? Check. More space? Chiggy check. Better stereo? Microphone checka, one-two-checka. And at this point, the price difference between the GS and LS is negligible. In fact, according to my last Cars.com search, LS models from ’06 and ’07 with low miles are well below $15,000.

You say you’re not that old? Pssshhh again. There are younger and hipper people than you driving LSes, and they’re being used for nearly exactly the same purpose you’ve described.

Besides, the GS is pretty much the definition of a poseur car. It’s not really the best at anything, is it? With the GS, Lexus tried to copy a 5 Series Bimmer and failed. With the LS, Lexus copied the S-Class and made a better mousetrap — at least when it comes to reliability. The LS has become an icon. The GS has become lot poison, destined to lose each and every comparison test between its origination and the end of time.

But you did say that you wanted that quick 0-60 time of the GS now and then, so there’s your reason to get it. Oh wait — no, it isn’t. The GS and LS are pretty much identical.

So, you’re wrong, you should choose a Lexus — but you should just choose a different one. Go LS shopping, and you’ll be glad you did.