QOTD: Does Any Car Do a Better (or Worse) Job of Looking Good and Bad Than the Chevrolet Malibu?

Timothy Cain
by Timothy Cain

Sometimes the little things make a big difference. Body color door handles, for example, can take a simple compact car from appearing fit for penalty box duty to appearing worthy of driveway placement. Swap those black side mouldings and matte black mirror housings for body color paint and you’re home free.

In other instances, the absence of foglights in foglight housings turns a decent front fascia into a disappointment. A bigger front air dam has the potential to suggest the addition of horsepower. Chrome window surrounds, upgraded lighting, metallic paint, and red-trimmed grilles can add a premium aura to otherwise pitiful products.

Oh, and don’t forget the wheels. Wheels can cover a multitude of design errors.

But does any car benefit more from big, stylish wheels; body colour mirrors; and LED daytime running lights than the 2017 Chevrolet Malibu? And does any car suffer more from small wheels with puffy tires, black mirrors, and stock lighting than the 2017 Chevrolet Malibu?

On the one hand, the ninth-generation Chevrolet Malibu that was introduced earlier than expected for the 2016 model year can be downright eye-catching? Long, low, and wide, the Chevrolet Malibu Premier appears worthy of the $31,850 price GM wishes to charge. Sure, it’s a bit droopy from some angles and there are a wide variety of conflicting shapes around the lower air intake and the foglight housings. But overall, the current Malibu represents a massive leap forward for GM’s remaining midsize sedan.

Or does it? Strip away the mirrors’ paint, swap the Malibu Premier’s optional 245/40R19 Continental ProContact TX tires for 205/65R16 Firestone FT140s, eliminate the $695 sport suspension kit’s 10-millimeter drop and the $495 chrome-edged grille, slap on wheel covers, remove the LED lights, and the Chevrolet Malibu L loses all of its luster. Dealers don’t want this poverty-spec midsize car any closer to their actual showroom than a pre-owned first-gen Spark.

Does any car do a better job of swapping stained sweatpants for a three-piece suit than the ninth-gen Chevrolet Malibu? Does any car do a worse job of trading tuxedos for tracksuits than the ninth-gen Chevrolet Malibu?

[Images: General Motors]

Timothy Cain is a contributing analyst at The Truth About Cars and Autofocus.ca and the founder and former editor of GoodCarBadCar.net. Follow on Twitter @timcaincars.

Timothy Cain
Timothy Cain

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  • SPPPP SPPPP on Aug 24, 2017

    When I look at this car, I don't think long, low and wide. I think long, tall, and narrow. The "bustle butt" is mostly responsible for this, I think. And the super-high beltline.

  • Pig_Iron Pig_Iron on Aug 25, 2017

    Does it come in a brown electric self-driving wagon with stick? Then no.

  • Sundance Monaco, definitely. Lots of nice bars around the track. 😁
  • Mustangbear I was a young engineer at Ford in 1991, feeling very privileged to work on a team located inside the proving grounds. I remember seeing a group of people clustered against the windows at the side of the building abutting the high-speed track. As I joined them, I saw they were watching two very sleek coupes take a couple laps. Minutes later, the cars were in our parking lot, and everyone rushed outside to take our first look at the undisguised 1993 Mark VIII.
  • El scotto Posky owes you lunch, you got more comments.
  • El scotto My new beret would be the cheapest thing involved with restoring this. Well, maybe a pack of French cigarettes.
  • El scotto No, no, and once again NO! Here in the metro D.C. Kia dealers are advertising Tellurides with cash on the hood. Here's what makes people laugh out loud: "1.9% financing for well-qualified buyers"! So maybe, and I'm being very, very, very generous here; maybe .01 of 1% of Kia buyers can at least fill out the paperwork to be considered well-qualified. They are all low curdogs, Kia North America, their dealers, and those willing to pay extra for something that depreciates.
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