Ask Jack: These… Are… the Brakes!

True story: I once dated a woman who liked to kinda-semi-roleplay that I was Hannibal Lecter and she was Clarice Starling. I don’t mean that I served her anybody’s frontal lobe with a nice Chianti and some fava beans, but more that we would try to work phrases from the book into our conversations. Just in case you are wondering, this is a distant second place in the awkward-makeout-talk category of my sordid personal history, well behind the woman who wanted me to call her Bella while she called me Edward.

In Silence Of The Lambs, Dr. Lecter tells Clarice, “We begin by coveting what we see every day.” This is one of those statements that is almost too true for us to understand. We learn to want things by looking at them. It’s why very few people have whatever mental quality is required to order, and enjoy, truly bespoke items — cars, clothing, bikes, guns, watches, whatever. We like to see things and choose from them. It’s a combined limitation of the software (ability to imagine) and the hardware (the way we “see” is fairly hard-wired into our actual, physical eyes in all sorts of ways that we are just finding out about now) that comes standard with the human body.

The mere act of seeing something can be persuasive, even if we know in our heart that it’s not right for us — which was certainly the case with the Bella-and-Edward woman, I tell you. And that is how we come to this story of a fellow who wants a very specific kind of brake for his car… even if it’s not nearly enough to do the job.

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  • THX1136 A Mr. J. Sangburg, professional manicurist, rust repairer and 3 times survivor is hoping to get in on the bottom level of this magnificent property. He has designs to open a tea shop and used auto parts store in the facility as soon as there is affordable space available. He has stated, for the record, "You ain't seen anything yet and you probably won't." Always one for understatement, Mr. Sangburg hasn't been forthcoming with any more information at this time. You can follow the any further developments @GotItFiguredOut.net.
  • TheEndlessEnigma And yet government continues to grow....
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