Ace of Base: 2017 Chevrolet Spark LS Manual

Base model. What does that image conjure? Vinyl seats? Tinny AM radio? A low rent penalty box on wheels? A few years ago, you’d be right on the money. Driving misery was available for voluntary purchase at the showrooms of just about every major car maker.

Now, though … it’s tougher to find. This series has focused on vehicles out there that, in their cheapest guise, won’t make you cringe with each pull of the driver’s door handle. Here’s an example.

Redesigned last year, the diminutive Chevy Spark shrank a couple of inches in length and height while also losing its wild-eyed headlights, which actually stretched all the way from the front bumper to the A-pillar. GM engineers managed to stretch the wheelbase, which delivers better handling and helps vanquish the pogo-stick motions that plague the ride of some other small cars.

The 1.4-liter 98 horsepower inline-four won’t win any stoplight drags, but those looking for smoky burnouts should sign the note on a new Camaro ZL1 instead. Chevy has managed to stuff a remarkable amount of tech and features into the Spark, especially given its ramen-esque pricing — ten airbags, Apple CarPlay or Android Auto by way of a 7-inch touchscreen with USB and Bluetooth connectivity are all standard equipment.

A rear-facing camera and anti-lock brakes should keep new drivers out of the weeds, and a built-in wifi hotspot means they can constantly InstaChat and SnapGram their effortlessly fun, more-exciting-than-yours lifestyle. It’s a remarkable amount of kit for a base model hatchback.

Current cash allowances bring the price to $13,375 including freight. Canadian shoppers have it even better, what with GM locked in a battle with Nissan for low-price hatchback supremacy. Those north of the border can set their Tim Horton’s cups in the same model for $11,595 — a mere $8,800 worth of Freedom at today’s exchange rates.

You know what $8,800 bought you just a few short years ago? Sadness! That’s what! Sadness, presented to buyers in the form of a bland hatchback with frightening build quality and exterior styling penned by the creators of the The Lawrence Welk Show. If you wanted to adjust the side mirror, you manually cranked down the window, reached out, and put a greasy thumbprint on the reflective surface. Touchscreens, wi-fi, and seats which didn’t numb your butt after 100 miles? Ha! Dream on, kid.

Actually, adjusted for inflation, the 2017 Spark LS with a manual transmission is about $1,456 cheaper than its early ’90s equivalent, a base Geo Metro. I’m going to let that sink in for a minute. Economies of scale, man; they’re a great thing.

Not every base model has aced it. The ones that have? They help make the automotive landscape a lot better. Any others you can think of, B&B? Let us know in the comments. Naturally, feel free to eviscerate our selections.

The model above is shown with American options and is priced in Freedom Dollars. As always, your dealer may sell for less.