QOTD: What Vehicle Can You Not Stand No Matter What?

Matthew Guy
by Matthew Guy

A good many questions that start with the phrase, “Given an unlimited budget … ” tend to focus on what a person would buy with a bottomless pit of money — and why not? It’s fun to fill our imaginary garages with machines made of moonbeams and unobtanium.

Not this time. Right now, I’m here to ask you: what car makes you froth at the mouth? What car offends you worse than a gunnysack full or rotting tuna? What car would you never buy?

We’ve all got one. Whether it’s a specific model or an entire category of vehicles, I am certain everyone passionate about cars has an example of something they really can’t stand.

Me? I can’t ever see myself buying a minivan (apologies to my minivan-owning readers and co-workers). This, of course, makes no logical sense: minivans are large and well-shaped boxes into which one can plug cubic acres of people or stuff. Most of them are powered by decent V6 engines, many of which offer more horsepower than the 5.0-liter Mustangs I coveted in high school. Fuel mileage is reasonable. Maintenance costs are manageable.

They’re packed with technology, too. The Toyota Sienna’s intercom system will let drivers pipe their voice rearward towards young miscreants in the back row. The Honda Odyssey will let owners vacuum Cheerios and Gummi Bears from between the seats. Chrysler’s Town & Country keeps the young’uns updated on the trip ETA, quelling most are we there yet bleatings. In-flight entertainment abounds. These are all very good things.

Minivans are great vehicles and do a great job of their intended purpose. They are a supremely logical buying decision. And yet … I can’t. Call it being a slave to modern marketing. Call it a matter of pig-headed pandering to my own “image” (or lack thereof). Call it whatever you want. You’ll never find my signature on the bottom of a five-year note that reads “minivan” in the space where the F&I manager fills in the vehicle type.

That’s my never car. What’s yours?

[Image: Clover Autrey/ Flickr ( CC BY 2.0)]

Matthew Guy
Matthew Guy

Matthew buys, sells, fixes, & races cars. As a human index of auto & auction knowledge, he is fond of making money and offering loud opinions.

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  • 415s30 415s30 on Feb 07, 2017

    PT Cruiser

  • Sgeffe Sgeffe on Feb 11, 2017

    L8 to this, but: Kia Soul, Nissan Joke, or anything which looks like it was styled by the designer of the AMC Gremlin. (Fiatsler Pacifica excluded.) Smart cars. Kia Optima.

  • ToolGuy First picture: I realize that opinions vary on the height of modern trucks, but that entry door on the building is 80 inches tall and hits just below the headlights. Does anyone really believe this is reasonable?Second picture: I do not believe that is a good parking spot to be able to access the bed storage. More specifically, how do you plan to unload topsoil with the truck parked like that? Maybe you kids are taller than me.
  • ToolGuy The other day I attempted to check the engine oil in one of my old embarrassing vehicles and I guess the red shop towel I used wasn't genuine Snap-on (lots of counterfeits floating around) plus my driveway isn't completely level and long story short, the engine seized 3 minutes later.No more used cars for me, and nothing but dealer service from here on in (the journalists were right).
  • Doughboy Wow, Merc knocks it out of the park with their naming convention… again. /s
  • Doughboy I’ve seen car bras before, but never car beards. ZZ Top would be proud.
  • Bkojote Allright, actual person who knows trucks here, the article gets it a bit wrong.First off, the Maverick is not at all comparable to a Tacoma just because they're both Hybrids. Or lemme be blunt, the butch-est non-hybrid Maverick Tremor is suitable for 2/10 difficulty trails, a Trailhunter is for about 5/10 or maybe 6/10, just about the upper end of any stock vehicle you're buying from the factory. Aside from a Sasquatch Bronco or Rubicon Jeep Wrangler you're looking at something you're towing back if you want more capability (or perhaps something you /wish/ you were towing back.)Now, where the real world difference should play out is on the trail, where a lot of low speed crawling usually saps efficiency, especially when loaded to the gills. Real world MPG from a 4Runner is about 12-13mpg, So if this loaded-with-overlander-catalog Trailhunter is still pulling in the 20's - or even 18-19, that's a massive improvement.
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