Freaky Friday: Russian Truck Escapes From Human, Vermont Pants Disaster, and Lawmen Love Sentras

Steph Willems
by Steph Willems

There lived a certain man

In Russia not long ago…

Seemingly ordinary Russian men are prone to incredible — even Herculean — feats of strength and endurance, but the world didn’t know this until cheap dash cams became available in the Motherland. Watch as one truck (or SUV, we can’t tell) challenges its owner to a race.

That, an impromptu pants change leads to disaster in Vermont, and what to do if you spot a police officer driving your stolen Nissan, all after the break.

Strong, like Lada

When they’re not folding down the sun visor to block the annoying glow of potentially catastrophic meteor explosions, Russian men enjoy long-distance jogging. Take this man, for example.

There’s little context for this video, but the two-vehicle party seems to be headed up a hillside logging road for some recreational fun. It’s all quite peaceful. Russian Man clearly enjoys outdoor winter urination (and frankly, who doesn’t? It’s fun to write Vladimir in Cyrillic using nature’s favorite highlighter), but firmly applying the parking brake is not his favorite pastime.

The inevitable happens, and the chase is on. During the SUV’s 40-second getaway, high banks keep the vehicle on the road until its eventual rollover. Amazingly, Russian Man keeps his balance and catches up to the vehicle twice, but how you pull a vehicle to a stop? The answer: you don’t.

Russian Man’s friends have their own vehicle, meaning he won’t be marooned in the spooky white wilderness, though you have to wonder if they can lift the thing upright on their own. Wait, they’re Russians — of course they can!

Pants once again lead to heartbreak

Don’t do what this man did.

According to the Burlington Free Press, a tractor-trailer driver who rolled his rig in Vermont Wednesday was in the process of changing his pants at the time of the accident.

The rig, driven by 62-year-old Allen Johnson Sr. of Meriden, Connecticut, rolled off the I-89 near Williston, Vermont, at around 9:25 a.m. Wednesday. Johnson blew a 0.209 during a roadside sobriety test, which is five times past the legal limit for commercial drivers.

“Investigation also revealed that while Johnson was traveling north on the interstate at 63 miles per hour in a full size tractor trailer unit, he stood up from his driver’s seat and was attempting to change his pants in the front cab,” the Vermont State Police said in a statement. “Johnson was standing up vertically between the two front cab seats while his truck was in motion.”

Boozing and cruising doesn’t mix, but switching your ensemble while behind the wheel adds a whole ‘nother level of danger.

Steph Willems
Steph Willems

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  • -Nate -Nate on Nov 05, 2016

    For those who don't live in seriously cold areas ~ setting the parking brake isn't usually done because it often freezes there incapacitating the vehicle . I remember when one of our drivers was driving a big rig pulling a huge trailer full of equipments on heavy Los Angeles rush hour traffic, pants around his knees as he wanked off ~ when he plowed into the end of a long line of stopped vehicles at slow speed one managed to get scooped up and landed on the cab of his truck.... Of course our Garage was right across the freeway so we all piled into some City vehicles and drove over to point and laugh a him =8-) . -Nate

    • See 1 previous
    • -Nate -Nate on Nov 05, 2016

      @Lou_BC By 1969 I'd had enough frozen key locks, parking brake cables, on and on and..... -Nate

  • Gtem Gtem on Nov 07, 2016

    Judging by the HVAC vents and the way they flank the screen (and given the offroad setting), I'm guessing this is a Land Cruiser Prado 120 that took a tumble. The truck seen in front is an UAZ Patriot.

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