Dude, Where's My ObamaCar?

David Hester
by David Hester
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dude where s my obamacar

So, how would you all like a nice, juicy chunk of political red meat to chew on a lovely Tuesday morning? For those of you who aren’t interested, it’s all below the jump. For the rest of you, 350 comments or bust! Let’s do this…

Yesterday the Senate voted for cloture on what has been commonly described as The Immigration Bill but is technically known as Senate Bill 744. In order to make the bill palatable to a bipartisan supermajority of the Senate an amendment, known as the Corker- Hoeven amendment after it’s two Republican sponsors, was added late last week.

The primary focus of the amendment was to strengthen security at the border before legalization (or amnesty, if you prefer) for undocumented aliens could begin. Depending on which group of talking heads and/ or political hacks you want to believe, the border surge will either be a bulwark never failing against the rising tide of third- world misery threatening to engulf the Southwest or a completely hollow piece of garbage meant to give Republicans a fig leaf of “tough on illegal immigration” talking points to use as a Jedi mindtrick on the rubes back home that elected them.

So, what does all this have to do with cars? I’m getting there. As with all most legislation at the Federal all levels of government, it contains a lot of bribes vitally important funding necessary for the survival of the Republic. A brief (and admittedly partisan) breakdown of some of the bribes can be found here.

One of the Senators who needed some vital funding necessary for the survival of the Republic thrown his way before he could vote in good conscience for cloture was Senator Bernie Sanders (I- VT). His vital funding is found in Title V of the amendment under the heading “Jobs For Youth” and the text of it begins on page 1169 of the Corker- Hoeven Amendment. Basically it’s a $1.5 billion a year jobs program for underprivileged youths, tacked onto the bill as an admission that flooding the labor market with millions of unskilled and low- skilled immigrants willing to work 90 hours a week for wages barely above subsistence level will make it hard for native- born unskilled and low- skilled young people who demand a 40 hour workweek and minimum wage to get a job.

What’s causing consternation on the right side of our political aisle is a provision in Bernie’s Bribe that the funds can be used to “to provide summer employment opportunities for low-income youth, with direct linkages to academic and occupational learning, and may be used to provide supportive services, such as transportation or child care, that is necessary to enable the participation of such youth in the opportunities.” That highlighted line is being translated as authority for states that receive this money to use it to buy or lease cars for poor kids. Expect that to become a meme among the right over the next 24- hour news cycle leading up to the vote on the final bill.

As much as I enjoy beating up on the government (From the inside, no less!) and as wasteful as I may think Bernie’s Bribe is, the idea that the government is going to provide cars to underprivileged youths is nonsense on stilts. Even a hardcore Socialist like Bernie Sanders knows that people on either side of the aisle won’t tolerate buying individual people new cars, even if they were Priuses. Conservatives would be against it just because we’re mean, but liberals will be against it because providing an individual with his own car is anathema to the overwhelming desire to shoehorn individuals into public transportation.

“Supportive transportation services” is government-ese for “bus passes and subway tokens.” At worst, it’s authority for a state agency to buy a van and hire somebody to pick up underprivileged youths and take them to job training. As we watch the news cycle over the next couple of days, keep that in mind. There are plenty of good arguments to be made for and against the immigration bill as it gets voted out of the Senate and sent to die in the House of Representatives. There’s no need to resort to fairy tales of an ObamaCar in every driveway to be followed by ObamaJacuzzis on every back deck and ObamaBigScreens in every living room.

David Hester
David Hester

Police detective in Central KY, drives 2007 Crown Vic for work, 2001 Silverado and 2002 Camaro for fun.

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  • Nickshaw Nickshaw on Jun 25, 2013

    You're right, David, these funds will not be used to buy individual cars. They will be distributed as "transportation vouchers" or a special EBT card. With these, people could take the bus or buy gas for the car. So the first thing that will happen is setting up a new government fiefdom to administer the fund (that eliminates about a quarter of the money available. We will find, just as with welfare EBT cards, fraud will be rampant with people selling them to buy other things along with multiple cards being issued to the same person. And these cards will AUTOMATICALLY be offered to anyone who already collects government benefits (albeit there may be an age limit 'cause it's supposed to be for the "youts" but, you know how even that will quickly change to include all persons collecting aid) Let's not forget that organizations such as OFA, ACORN (or whatever they call themselves these days) and Planned Parenthood will get block amounts of funds to provide transportation to all those youts with summer jobs signing up Dims. The fraud and pseudo fraud that will be perpetrated will be enormous! With the extra competition in the form of blanket amnesty, why in heck would a yout bother with a job when they can get free food, free housing, free health care, free cell phones and now, free transportation? If you don't know this is the logical outcome, you don't know any youts! Remember the lady who said the election of Skeeter would mean she didn't have to pay for gas in her car or pay her mortgage? We laughed but, she was right.

  • Olddavid Olddavid on Jun 26, 2013

    This is a country built by immigration. Every nationality has experienced a phase where they are resented by the current residents. We need to look at Japan to see where we would end up without the influx of young ambitious people to populate a nation that isn't replacing it's old. Remember that all the current warnings of dire consequences were applied to the Irish after the famine. And the Italians, Polish, etc. We'll be OK. Change is difficult for some, but we have shown ourselves to be a resilient society. We should fear entrenched greed more than some family with such drive for a better life that they are willing to risk their lives to walk through the desert to a better life.

    • See 2 previous
    • Nrd515 Nrd515 on Jun 27, 2013

      Reading some of the stuff written about the Irish and other immigrants back about 110 years ago sounds eerily similar to some of the "the sky is falling" nonsense being written now. It was silly back then, and still is now.

  • Analoggrotto Buyers are skipping these in droves and heading down to sign the golden paperwork for a new Telluride. ATPs speak volumes and we have 'em. Our customers are telling us that we offer Mercedes quality for a better deal, and our suite of luxury features rivals any luxury automaker. Insult me all you want, but AVMs, DSDs and BSODs tell the truth.
  • Ted Lulis The Exodus from California is mind-boggling. No surprise from the rectum of the country
  • Mr Imperial Seeing the adjusted-for-inflation amount always makes me sick, I can't believe how much it has gone up in my 40-some-odd trips around the sun. Still fondly remember seeing these and Ford Explorers everywhere.
  • Kyl65759578 👋
  • ToolGuy I appreciate the thoughtful comments from the little people here, and I would like to remind everyone that Ford Motor Company offers a full range of vehicles which are ideal for any driving environment including New York City. The size and weight our of product portfolio has been fully and completely optimized to be friendly to the planet and friendly to pedestrians while consuming the bare minimum of resources from our precious planet (I am of course a lifelong environmentalist). Plus, our performance models will help you move forward and upward by conquering obstacles and limits such as congestion and your fellow humans more quickly at a higher rate of speed. I invite you to learn more at our website.Signed, William Clay Ford Jr.