Review: 2013 Toyota Camry SE V6

Hello TTAC! For those who wondered where I went, I’m back from my global tour with the USAF. I am back in my native West Texas, attending Texas Tech University in pursuit of a Mechanical Engineering degree. As a break from finals, I test drove the best selling car in the US, with a decidedly continental Captain Solo slant. Thus far, I have consumed two overpriced lattes and wandered around Lubbock for 45 minutes in an attempt to organize my thoughts and come towards an unbiased conclusion about the baffling Toyota Camry.

I’m filled with competing emotions of loathing, rage, and acceptance. I loathed the way it drove, I raged at how the car failed to respond, and came to accept that Toyota did not design the Camry SE for me, but for the demographic lurking in the suburbs of sprawling cities whose main focuses are safety from anything that could harm them, and ignorance in the art of driving.

Toyota designates their sporty models with the badge of “SE”, to separate these offerings from their more pedestrian LE and XLE offerings. The SE’s dual exhaust tips hinted that the crisp lines offered more on tap than the general white goods Camry seen plodding along the commutes of America. The latest redesign of the Camry sports crisp, almost Euro inspired lines. Which results in fewer curves, making the rather large previous generation look bulbous. So, in the great vein of middle-class middle-sized sedans, the Camry looks like a car.

The Camry plies the middle road with no-risk styling, modernizing lines seen on a cabin birthed back in 2001. And the field left Toyota behind: the Fusion, Sonata, Optima and even the Mazda6 advanced the mid-sized segment. They look beautiful, futuristic, elegant, and attractive. Mr. and Mrs. Suburbia can drive something with distinction formerly relegated to the premium classes. Take note Toyota, before it’s too late.

The interior speaks more of the same: functional, useful, and up to date, with nothing distinguishing. Gone are the slick glass panels, now in matte black plastics. Then I detected misaligned buttons, plastic flash seams on the door panels, and mismatched fabric colors. They stand out like a hipster on Wall Street. Never in a Toyota product have I seen build quality issues like these! While minor and common in Chrysler offerings, if quality control Fail crops up in plainly visible areas, where else has Toyota gone astray?

Luckily the stereo’s touchscreen interface uses an adequate speaker system to speak to serene commuting levels. On bumpy roads, touching it without a ‘double-click’ is challenging. The tiller contains numerous buttons to mitigate this problem, all stereo controls (among others) are accessible here. Sadly the buttons protrude heavily into the sporting zone, threatening to change radio stations should you thrash at the wheel in an attempt at sporting prowess.

One major cost-cutting maneuver lies plain once you adjust the climate control. Both fan and temp settings must be adjusted continuously, as Toyota has not installed automatic climate control on the SE, unlike most of its rivals. The fan has a great range (with over 10 settings, wahey!) but once the cabin cools, position 1 wheezes cool air while 2 forces air hard enough to demand splitting the flow between your feet, the dash, and the windshield in order to get a comfortable, cool waft through the cabin. My kingdom for a superior rheostat!

So far, the Camry’s given nothing to inspire rage and loathing on levels not seen since Fox canceled Firefly. But one turn of the wheel brought all these emotions to the surface in a petrolhead rage.

I have not felt steering this bad since the days of British Leyland. The typical numb on-center feel and lack of feedback give immediate and distinct impressions of “toaster on wheels”. Or maybe “outdated and dumb Cylon”. Entering a corner, the steering firms up in a progressive but ultimately futile attempt at sport sedan prowess. I pitched the Camry SE into several hard corners and was rewarded with phenomenal understeer. Any lifting of the throttle in an attempt to tighten up the line resulted in eHarmony levels of rejection. The Toyota plowed ahead like a clueless tourist in Times Square, complete with abundant squealing.

The most recent Camry national advertisement has a typical couple exclaiming the sporty SE is “Grounded to the Ground!” Yes, the tires give ample grip, only noticeable in the minute the car is gripping. Then next comes the aforementioned squealing understeer: this is driving Novocain with track tires.

“But Capt Mike! It’s not a sports car!” you say.

Of course not. Yet in situations where steering feel warns of problems (hydroplaning, ice, collision avoidance) the Camry SE gives lifeless to the point of useless. Beating at the steering column with a wiffle bat and screaming like Yvette Fielding in ‘Most Haunted’ are more entertaining than trying to make the Camry hustle. It doesn’t move, flow, or have chassis alacrity all its rivals exhibit. If Toyota went for safe, they made boringly unsafe instead.

To its credit, in situations needing only straight ahead mindlessness, the Camry does demonstrate remarkable body control and damping. Never upset by rough surface, nor jounced by sudden bumps, the sportiest Camry remains calm, composed and quiet. The V6 pumps out a nice sounding, rev willing 268bhp coupled to a competent shifting 6-speed auto. The shift paddles behind the wheel respond quicker than most systems I’ve driven, yet lag behind the wonderful DSG and PDK systems of Audi and Porsche. (Given the asking price, no surprise there?) Shifts are smooth, and on downshift, the computer actually rev matches! It’s almost sporty: except when shifting, you are still holding onto that wheel and not an actual gear change lever…which kills my inner child.

Brakes? Yes. It has them. Progressive feedback, stops quick, anti-locks engage at the right time. The stability control only intrudes when your attempts at carving corners fails in a squealing mess, yet doesn’t kill all power like some systems that entirely remove the driver from throttle control.

So as I sit here at J&B Coffee across from Texas Tech, surrounded by hipsters, cowboys, students, and apparently a drag queen, have I come to a conclusion about the Camry?

Yes. Toyota built a sequel hoping people will line up like Twilight fans.

Fans completely devoted to something mired in mediocrity, while its competitors, namely the Ford Fusion, and the Kia Optima/Hyundai Sonata twins went for full reboot. Would I recommend the Toyota? 10 years ago, yes, but today, there are far better alternatives, purchased for less and are on-par in reliability. So I plead to Toyota: remember the Supra? The Celica? The 1st and 2nd-gen MR2? You CAN do exciting and beautiful, you just need to rediscover that passion and verve before you become the next GM circa 2005.