Man Attacks Junker Hearse In Canadian Tire Parking Lot, Is Detained, Released

Mark Stevenson
by Mark Stevenson

Almost every car guy has experienced being pushed over the brink by a car so evil it could be characterized as possessed. A man in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada wanted to perform his own exorcism on an old hearse in a Canadian Tire parking lot before sending it off to the big crusher in the sky over the weekend.

After parking the hearse at the Canadian Tire outlet, the man entered the store to procure his exorcism tools – a crowbar and sledgehammer – and after declining the receipt was overheard saying, “When I’m done with these, no one will want them back.”

The man then proceeded to release his divine fury on the hearse, which appears to be an old Cadillac, and was standing on the roof with sledgehammer in hand when police officers arrived. After cuffing and questioning the man, he agreed to clean up the debris of the evicted demons and was released.

“He had the salvage company on the way for it, so he wanted to get his licks in before it went,” said Sgt. David Publicover of Halifax Regional Police. “That’s pretty much it.

“He just wanted to give it a goodbye, I guess.”

Mark Stevenson
Mark Stevenson

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  • Ranwhenparked Ranwhenparked on Oct 17, 2012

    Poor S&S Landau, I'm sure some pale goth weirdo kids would have loved to have it.

  • Acuraandy Acuraandy on Oct 17, 2012

    Looks/sounds like a Trailer Park Boys bit. I was waiting for Julian to run up with a Windsor/Coke in hand to subdue the Regional cop whist Ricky got away so they could get back to Sunnyvale to grow 'Dope'. Oh, Canada! P.S. Please let me in! :)

  • Luke42 Luke42 on Oct 17, 2012

    so many comments about beating a dead hearse... [ducks]

  • Ponchoman49 Ponchoman49 on Oct 18, 2012

    Looks like a 90-92 edition which would mean a TBI Chevy 350 V8 under hood. I know several collectors of the full size 90-02 Broughams equipped with said 350 with over 300K miles on the original engines that still purr like a kitten. It's a shame to see one get intentionally bashed up as someone is losing out on some good parts for there car that they didn't intend on getting smashed.

    • 28-Cars-Later 28-Cars-Later on Oct 19, 2012

      Betcha it was Olds 307, that would be enough to make me want to destroy it.

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