By on November 2, 2011

Wholesale heaven is a miserable place. For every Mercury Milan that finds itself at the auctions, you have at least three ex-rental Chrysler Sebrings that have yet to find a permanent home. As I mentioned to Bertel and Ed this past week, “Everyone wants a good deal at the auctions. But no one wants a Mitsubishi.”

Retail buyers usually want to have a bit of name cachet… which is a big problem on the wholesale level since there are now a long list of models that have officially become one generation wonders.The list of automotive anonymity is almost endless these days. Most folks outside the auto industry have no idea what a G5 or a G3 is. Crossfire is a TV show. A Relay belongs on the track… and as for an Aztek… well that’s just an Edsel in SUV drag. At least everyone still knows an Aztek when they see one.I can tell you with a near 100% certainty that most of the ‘unpopular’ names will find their home at the easy credit lots. Terraza, Verano, Reno, L300, Ion, 9-7… the names are usually bad enough. But selling the 47th acronymed vehicle in today’s market? WTF?Which brings us to today’s question. What are the best and worst sounding automotive models of modern times? Feel free to use a name that is outside your country’s border if you wish. Just don’t call my old two door Toyota a ‘shitty’ car.
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114 Comments on “Hammer Time: If It Sounds Like A Duck, Is It A Catera?...”


  • avatar
    Conslaw

    Ford Aspire. What does it aspire to be? a car?

  • avatar
    Downtown Dan

    The Japanese domestic market had this game figured out long ago, to wit:

    Suzuki Every Joy Pop Turbo

    Daihatsu Naked

    Honda Life Dunk

    Mazda Bongo Friendee

    Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard

  • avatar
    solo2z06

    Chevy LUV. What was to love about it?

  • avatar
    bryanska

    Alero.

    As my wife put it, “like old High German for an old woman getting out a bath…”

  • avatar
    Diewaldo

    Mitsubishi Pajero (just ask someone from Spain)
    Vauxhall Nova (again for Spanish speakers)
    Seat Ibiza (hey, I wanted car, not only a seat)
    Madzda Laputa (once again for Spanish speakers)
    Dodge Swinger (always standing in another parking slot losing fluids)

  • avatar
    johnhowington

    any vehicle named with only 3 letters in it, excluding the Fit, but including SRX, RDX, etc.

  • avatar
    missinginvlissingen

    Is this a good place to point out the idiocy of Lincoln giving ALL of its cars labels starting with “MK”: MKX, MKT, MKZ, MKS? What do these letters mean to anyone? Zero. What does “Town Car” mean? Everyone knows.

    I haven’t been in a Lincoln showroom recently, but do the salespeople at least use shorthand and refer to the X, T, Z and S?

    Also, I always marveled at Chevy’s choice of “Citation” for a car that could never go fast enough to earn one.

    • 0 avatar
      fincar1

      …especially after Edsel had already used the name. Other Edsel series names were Corsair, Ranger (hmm, sounds familiar), and Pacer. Pacer? Let’s try that one again….

      • 0 avatar
        morbo

        I actually test drove the MKS recently. Mainly because I wanted to test drive a Taurus SHO but they’re weren’t any on the lot, and the MKS was the closest car to an SHO on the lot. The saleguy and manager both agreed it should just be called a Continental.

        Yet when I called it the fancy Lincoln Taurus they didn’t like it. Lincoln dealers defintiely don’t like the MK-ABC-123 naming scheme.

    • 0 avatar
      carve

      I just call them MK-Flex, MK-Fusion, MK-Taurus, etc. I couldn’t even tell you which one belongs to the X,T,Z and S.

    • 0 avatar
      NulloModo

      Yes, we generally shorten the names to Z, X, S and T around the showroom. Though since S sounds like X and Z like T, especially over the phone, and since customers often get the names confused we refer to them as the ‘big car’, ‘midsize car’, ‘2 row crossover’ and ‘3 row crossover’ as often as anything else.

      • 0 avatar
        korvetkeith

        My friends work for ford and theyre always talking Mk-whatevers. I feel a little bad about not caring which model they are actually talking about. I guess most frequently I picture the Mk fusion. Which one is that?

      • 0 avatar
        ponchoman49

        That says a lot about the stupidity of 3 letter names for every car/suv line if the customer can’t even remember which is which. Thanks Germany and Japan for encouraging this nonsense.

      • 0 avatar
        redav

        I’d love to see a car maker actually market such descriptive names. Just imagine a customer at the dealership:
        Customer: I really like the Ford compact–what’s that one called?
        Salesman: The “Compact.”
        Customer: Oh, that makes sense. But do you have anything bigger, maybe a midsize?
        Salesman: Sure! Let’s take a look at the Ford Midsize.
        Either that, or they could start selling cars in S, M, and L.

        I’ve also thought it’d be great to rebadge one of those alphebet soup cars to something sensible. For example, remove the “MKZ” and make a custom “Zephyr” badge to put on in its place.

  • avatar
    getacargetacheck

    Achieva and Esteem.

  • avatar
    sco

    Anything with the word “Grand” in it always strikes me as funny

  • avatar
    carve

    The worst are the Lincoln MK-whatevers. It makes them all sound alike. Just drop the MK and give them one letter names, or, ideally, actual names. Acura is not much better. The name “TL” and “TSX” and “RL” gives me no clue to the relative placement of each model. Cadillac has a similar issue. Isn’t that the whole point of an alphanumeric name? That’s how the Germans use them, and nobody complains. For BMW, higher number = bigger car and bigger engine. Higher number = bigger car for Audi, and the letter says whether it’s the normal version or the sporty version.

    Another mouthful: MP412C. It’s not a name- it’s a part number.

    Best car names?
    Corvette
    Taurus
    Highlander
    Wrangler
    Viper
    Boxster
    Supra
    Land Cruiser
    Patrol

    Mostly interesting cars, but there are a few boring ones in there with good names.

    • 0 avatar
      Lampredotto

      Best car name ever: Roadmaster. How can anyone top that? Just listen to the name. Roadmaster. Sounds like it has four hundred horse, and could cruise at ninety without breaking a sweat. It’s the master of the freakin’ road, fer Chrissakes.

      Come to think of it, Buick has an uncommonly good track record with great car names, all of them evocative, romantic, optimistic:

      Wildcat
      Electra
      Skylark
      Riviera
      Apollo

    • 0 avatar
      CJinSD

      The story at Acura is that they found that Legend and Integra had better name recognition than Acura and they thought that was a bad thing for long term brand prospects. Sort of like how Civic and Accord took on a life of their own and kept Honda from succeeding… I believe the three letter acronym to be avoided most stringently is MBA.

    • 0 avatar
      outback_ute

      In the vein of Roadblaster, I give you “Sand Bruiser”

  • avatar

    Not gonna lie, I hate 3 lettered names, even though I own one, they do not sound anywhere as good as an actual word. i.e. Freelander>LR2 or Discovery>LR3

  • avatar
    ...m...

    Merkur XR4Ti

    …we just called it the “zratty”…in more modern times, though, nobody beats subaru…

    Subaru Impreza WRX STI Spec C Type RA-R

  • avatar
    fincar1

    On the alphanumeric names, everyone knew what a Toyota MR2 was. This should give manufacturers a clue: That kind of a name will work if it’s the only one in your lineup and everything else has an actual name.

    My nominations for stupid car names: Golf, Rabbit.

    A good car name that’s never been used: Hammer!

    • 0 avatar
      eCurmudgeon

      A good car name that’s never been used: Hammer!

      Didn’t AMG use that as a model name at one point?

    • 0 avatar
      Marko

      Actually, the name “Hammer” was used by AMG in the 1980s for their performance version of the E-Class.

    • 0 avatar
      SuperACG

      VW has plenty of great names, including GOLF. It’s for “gulf stream” as JETTA is for “jet stream.” Notice the trend? They are tradewinds as are a PASSAT and a SCIROCCO. EOS? Try the Greek GODDESS OF WIND! VW likes its winds…probably because its early engines were cooled by it.

      As much as I like VWs…even I laugh at calling a naturally-aspirated diesel a DASHER!!

    • 0 avatar
      jamesbr

      If I recall correctly, to the French MR2 sounds a lot like merde. So they thought that car was pretty crappy.

  • avatar
    BeyondBelief

    Toyota Previa.

    Not sure why you’d name a car after a pregnancy complication. Ew.

  • avatar
    cdotson

    Mystique=Mistake. Literally…my high school driver’s ed teacher was from the hill country of WV and with his accent the Mystique (which was one of the brand-new models used for the on-road tests he didn’t teach) always came out all wrong.

    The Quebecois don’t like (or maybe they like too much) the Lacrosse.

    • 0 avatar
      wagonsonly

      There’s a reason the LaCrosse is sold as the Allure across the border.

      • 0 avatar
        KalapanaBlack

        Buick has dropped the name difference, and registered LaCrosse as the car’s model name in Canada, from 2011 forward. In fact, they offer to retrofit LaCrosse nameplates to any current generation sold as an Allure for free at the Buick dealer.

  • avatar
    drylbrg

    Ford Probe. I owned a mid-90s GT and it was a fun little car, but the name made me think of my Navy physical every time I saw it.

    • 0 avatar
      Duncan

      I agree – I remember reading a Car and Driver article on an Acura Integra back in the 90s. The “cons” for the car was that it looked “a bit probish.” At the time it cracked me up – it’s not that it was an unfair characterization, it just seemed a little out of left field. It was months later when I finally made the connection. Oh – it looks a bit like a Ford Probe.

      Anyway – “Probe” gets my vote for worst name ever.

      The Bugatti Sexarosa from The Simpsons is my favorite car name ever. The Hyundai Veloster is a close second.

      • 0 avatar
        Educator(of teachers)Dan

        My classmates in high school teased one of the girls mercilessly when she remarked of her Ford; “Yeah I have to share a Probe with my sister.”

  • avatar
    jaydez

    Worst: Lincoln’s MX whatevers, Tiguan, Routan, Freestyle.

    Best: Hammerhead Eagle i-Thrust… or just Geoff.

  • avatar
    Rob Finfrock

    Terraza, Verano, Reno, L300, Ion, 9-7… the names are usually bad enough.

    I’m pretty sure you meant “Verona,” as in the rebadged Daewoo sedan once sold by Suzuki. A “Verano” is the upcoming rebadged Daewoo “Opel” sedan to be sold by Buick.

    Both are incredibly stupid names for cars.

  • avatar
    Sammy B

    I love that Toyota basically just called their minivan “Van” and truck “Pickup” in the 80s (and to the mid 90s until the Tacoma came along).

    While Vanwagon & Hilux may have been the official names, they weren’t really used.

    My recent least favorite name would be Solara. just awful.

    • 0 avatar
      ttacfan

      FYI: In Russian “solara” is the name of the lowest grade of the diesel fuel. One that you would put in a farm tractor, but not into a car or truck or a bus.

      • 0 avatar
        NulloModo

        Was the Solara ever sold as such in Russia? That particular name never bothered me, and it even makes sense – it’s a convertible, you buy a convertible to let the sun in, sun -> solar -> solara.

    • 0 avatar
      TurboMark

      Sammy, the Toyota Van isn’t all that terrible compared to what it was called in Japan; the MasterAce. Apparently they figured that anything is preferable to a name that sounded like Nazi propaganda, although to be honest the European version was called the Space Cruiser which is pretty awesome, kinda like Land Cruiser only with more intergalactic charm.

  • avatar
    philadlj

    Cruze: Even if spelled right, it doesn’t sound right. Not that Cobalt was any better.

    Venza: Sounds like a drug.

    Lacrosse: I’m from Maryland. They might as well have called it the “bleached jock.”

    Enclave: “Buick Taxhaven” sounds better.

    Verano: I know it’s Spanish for “summer”, but it still sounds made-up.

    Yaris: IT’S A CAR!…with a baffling name.

    Juke: Too easy.

    Nitro: Just what I wanted, a combustable SUV.

    Rogue: What exactly about this cheapo RX is roguish?

    Flex: Not a good idea to name a car something you don’t want its frame to do.

    Santa Fe/Tucson: Live in the desert, get a Hyundai named after you.

    Veloster: Not that fast (till the turbo, anyway); not a roadster.

    Lincoln MKanything.

    Mazda 2,3,6…these are numbers, not names.

    MINI ____man. Sexist.

    QX56, JX, TSX, ZDX: What is this, Scrabble?

    Cayenne: A Porsche SUV is one thing. Naming it after a spice is just salt on the wound.

    The letter trend shows no signs of ending…

    XV: Outback Sport was a little confusing…
    BRZ: Boxer engine, RWD…Z.
    FR-S: A Scion FoR uS.
    JX: More Scrabble.
    BMW i: Like M, but green.

  • avatar
    brettc

    Chevy Celebrity (what was so special about it?)
    VW Touareg (most people can’t spell it and it makes no sense in North America)
    VW Routan (it’s a Chrysler minivan, FFS)
    The 2005 VW Rabbit (why did it suddenly become the Rabbit and then revert back to the Golf?)
    Ford Aspire (I call it the A** pirate)
    Ford Festiva (my wife calls it the Fajita and now so do I)
    Any of the idiotic alphanumeric models as many others have pointed out

    I’m sure there are many others, but those are the worst offenders I can come up with at the moment.

  • avatar

    http://www.edu-n-news.com/

  • avatar
    morbo

    I do want cool names for cars again. Letters and nummers are for ferreners (say it like Larry the cable guy). I want a Taurus. an Imperial, a Corvette, a ThunderCougarFalconBird. Hell even a Legend, a Diamante, or a Supra is better then a TS-SR-RD-X.

  • avatar
    JoelW

    Did I miss it? Or has no one brought up the venerable:

    *** Subaru Justy ***

    Also, love the fact that “Catera” was used in the title of this post. I know someone who worked at Cadillac customer service around the time the car was released. Internally, it was known by the monikers:

    “Caterasaurus”

    and

    “Caterrible”

    • 0 avatar
      Lampredotto

      I had a Justy in college. We called it the “lusty busty Justy”.

      When I say that it was the most fun you can have with three cylinders, I’m not being facetious. That car was a ball.

      • 0 avatar
        cfclark

        I knew a girl in college who had a yellow Justy—she named it Pooh (as in Winnie). Her vanity plate was OH BTHR.

        You can draw your own conclusions about exactly how much she knew about cars.

  • avatar
    carve

    Maybe a company should start name their cars after the dogs they’re most similar to.

    E.g. A huge SUV would be “the mastiff”. The sportscar the “Greyhound”, the pickup the “Husky”, the minivan the “Dachscund”, the compact roadster the whippet, the tall wagon “The retreiver”, the mini city car “the Pug”, the cutsy chick car “Corgi”, etc.

  • avatar
    Hognose

    We can credit foreign trademark law for the overflowing septic tank of alphanumeric names. In the USA, trademark laws only protect your name solidly in cases where the probability of confusion is real. So Honda can’t launch a LaSalle without buying the name from GM or getting permission to use it. (This has been done in the past, particularly with names that were only used for one-off show cars).

    Germany, on the other hand, enforces trademarks more widely. This is a big part of why German cars have numbers and oligographs, not names, generally (Porsche has made some exceptions over the years, as does VW). With the Teutonic reputation, it works well enough… German cars are sold as if they were Cyberdyne Corp. Terminators.

    It doesn’t have to be a car, in Germany. When Ford introduced the Mustang in 1964, a legal threat from the maker of Mustang brand lawn tractors forced them to rebadge the pony car as the “T5”. (Speaking of Terminators). Having driven many of the cars and one of the tractors, I’m here to tell you not everything the Germans build is worth driving.

    In Japan, a trademark is absolute and universal. So you can not trademark *anything* that has been trademarked by *anybody* for any purpose. If the name’s been used for a car, lawn tractor, or even a flatware set, computer, or line of handbags, you can’t use it. Hence, the popularity of made-up or whimsical names. Of course, with the Japanese having established a reputation for quality, now domestic nameplates try to ape the Japanese names, sometimes with comical or pathetic results. (Aztek?)

  • avatar
    supremebrougham

    Chevrolet HHR. I can complain because I had one. It was actually a fine little car, but that name! It felt like I was stuttering when I had to say it, so I decided to refer to it as the Chevrolet Heritage. Sounds much nicer doesn’t it? Then after a while I decided that since it was such a heavy little car I started calling it Piglet, which then turned into Piglet the Heritage.

    Moving on…

    Lincoln, PLEASE bring back the old names!!!! I’m considered a bit of an expert in many circles when it comes to telling cars apart, so if I’m having trouble remembering which cars are which, then we’ve really got a problem.

    And lastly…

    My all time favorite car name? Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme Brougham!!!

  • avatar
    Zackman

    These are my favorite car mnames:
    Impala. (duh!)
    Chevelle.
    Heavy Chevy (oops – trim option).
    Galaxie 500.
    Royal Lancer.
    Satellite Sebring.
    Cheyenne.
    Bel Air.
    Mustang.

    My worst?
    Matador.
    Marauder.
    Falcon.
    210 & 150.

    That’s about it.

    • 0 avatar
      geozinger

      What’s the matter with Marauder? I wanted one of those. The 1964 version, not the 2004 version. That one was just, well, lame.

      • 0 avatar
        Zackman

        @geozinger:

        I suppose because it means “rape and pillage”, but you’re correct about the 1964 version – my buddy and I saw one of those babies in the late 60’s – all gold including the leather interior! Simply beautiful. Yes, both of us wanted that car!

      • 0 avatar
        geozinger

        @Zackman: Oh, I hadn’t thought of that connotation. We had a football team back home with that name. They marauded the crap out of us every year…

      • 0 avatar
        SuperACG

        The Marauder of the 21st century, LAME?! What is this? No Panther Love amongst men?!

      • 0 avatar
        tonyola

        Yes, the 2004 Marauder was lame because for all its image and high price, it was slower than the 1996 Impala SS. The Florida Highway Patrol bought several Marauders for plainclothes duty, but I spoke to a trooper who said the Marauders weren’t much faster than the regular FHP Crown Vic cruisers. Don’t tell me that it can be modded for big power – it should have had the power right off the showroom floor. No wonder it was a huge sales flop.

    • 0 avatar
      rwb

      Falcon?! You think Falcon is a bad name for a car?

  • avatar
    geozinger

    Camry – a what? I think my hearing aid is on the fritz again…
    Corolla – who names their car after a cigar?
    Cressida – Hey, I know that girl…
    Passat – as in “hey, pass that thing, will ya?”
    Probe – obvious
    Vibe – obvious part deux
    Cavalier – explains the attitude But I say it like the French, cavall-ee-ay.
    MXx, MKx, MRx, STx,where x=whatever the last letter or number is. At that point, I don’t care anymore.

    I actually like the Hyundai Santa Fe/Tucson/Phoenix/Bakersfield/Tucumcari SUVs. I’m so tired of the Honda Odyssey/Mystery/Epiphany/Dysentery. Maybe I can get a nice Lexus Valium…

    I too wish for the return of actual names for cars. We could even use regular people’s names. What could be more honest than a Ford F100 Fred. Or a GMC Jimmy. No, wait, we had that already. So much for that idea…

    • 0 avatar
      SuperACG

      A “Corolla” is part of a flower. Actually, Toyota used many parts of flower anatomy to name their cars. Corona and Cressida come to mind.

      • 0 avatar
        KalapanaBlack

        Actually, Toyota’s classic model names all relate in some form to the word “Crown.”

        E.g. Camry (“Kanmuri” is Japanese for crown, which was Anglicized to Camry – listen to a Japanese person say Camry and you can still hear “kanmuri”), Corona (Latin for crown), Corolla (a version of Corona), Carina (another version of Corona), Crown (obvious), etc.

        Of course, Toyota has moved away from this beginning in the late 1960s, but their iconic names endured for the most part, and still relate back to “crown.”

      • 0 avatar
        geozinger

        We had the discussion last week about Cressida and her place in mythology. Not to mention the butterfly, and amusingly, a moon of Uranus. I can’t find any reference of Cressida and flowers.

        Corolla is all of the petals of a flower. Or a cigar. They used to be a decent cigar back in the 70’s.

        Corona part of the eye, the atmosphere around the sun, or a really crappy beer from Mexico.

        Camry still sounds like a mistake, no matter who pronounces it. John Davis of Motorweek fame used to call it Cam-ray. I had a (dyslexic) friend who called them Cam-a-rees.

        Now that it’s part of the lexicon, it’s more familiar, but it doesn’t follow the rules of English spelling.

    • 0 avatar
      Bimmer

      In Russian ‘Passat’ literally means ‘to take a piss’. And, yes, it is sold as Passat there.

  • avatar
    Educator(of teachers)Dan

    Still hate Suzuki “Sidekick.” Car and Driver once remarked that it was what you bought to play second fiddle to the Batmobile.

  • avatar
    obruni

    i’m surprised that no one has mentioned the French vans yet!

    Renault Kangoo Be Bop
    Peugeot Bipper Tepee

    other losers:
    Mitsubishi Carisma
    Mercedes Vaneo
    Daihatsu Applause
    Honda Concerto
    Hyundai Getz
    Mazda Xedos 6 (the euro-spec Millenia)
    Renault Rodeo
    Rover Streetwise
    Nissan Qasqhai
    Seat Arosa
    Maserati Shamal

    • 0 avatar
      daveainchina

      Living in China I get to see all kinds of strange names.

      the one that stands out besides the alphabet soup of letter/number combinations is

      Chevy LOVA

      It’s horrible and yet at the same time cracks me up.
      I have to give props to Chery Motors though for the QQ
      QQ is the synonymous with bad quality and poor reliability and the name comes from software that is like the chinese version of MSN messenger.

  • avatar
    JMII

    I drive a Z… very few cars can get away with a single letter as name. Of course its technically a 350 Z Touring, but I can just say “Z” and everyone immediately knows what I’m talking about.

    Volvo suffers from the same problem as Mercury / Lexus with what appear to be just random letter and number combinations. For awhile Ford named everything F-something. I also drive a Dodge Dakota which is pretty stupid, are there any other cars named after states? I can just hear the ad now… “Drive the all new Maine” or about a Florida or a Texas. The mind boggles.

    VW Tiguan is my personal worst name winner: the combination of Tiger and Iguana! Really?

    My favorite name: Geo Metro LSi Convertible. The name was bigger then the car, I don’t how they found room on the deck lid for all those letters. I joking refer it as the Geo Metro LSi Converitble AWD Turbo GTR. It helps to use The Price Is Right announcer voice when you say it. As if making the name longer means its better.

  • avatar
    MadHungarian

    Nine hours of comments and I’m the first one to mention the Daihatsu Charade? That’s a lot worse than the Aspire, which you could say at least had some ambition.

  • avatar
    obbop

    Eagerly awaiting for the confused marketing “pro” to offer the Peking Porta-Potty.

  • avatar
    70Cougar

    Toureg or however the hell you spell it.

  • avatar
    Robert Schwartz

    “Retail buyers usually want to have a bit of name cache… ”

    Cache: a hiding place, especially one in the ground, for ammunition, food, treasures, etc.

    Cachet: a sign or expression of approval, especially from a person who has a great deal of prestige. superior status; prestige:

  • avatar
    Jimizon

    I still can’t get over the name “Vigor” that Acura used before updating to “TL”.

  • avatar
    Rental Man

    Hyundai Tiburon
    Nissan Fairlady
    Pontiac firefly (Canadia Suzuki swift – Like FireBird only not)
    Scoda superb, Roomster, Favorit

    Mazda Scrum
    Mazda Bongo

    Suzuki Palette, Randy, Signs
    Suzuki Wagon R Stingray (Non split window)
    Suzuki Every Wagon
    Suzuki Rapin (Really?)

  • avatar
    jamesbr

    As stated by Top Gear, the best car name is:

    Jensen Interceptor

  • avatar
    Morea

    Best: Testarossa

    Worst: Vigor

  • avatar
    MrBostn

    I like Charger, Challenger, Legend, Integra, Cutlass-(what is a Cutlass anyway?)

    Dislike Valiant, Dart, Gremlin, Hornet. I also don’t care for names like Canyon, Colorado, Santa Fe, Tuscon.

    • 0 avatar
      jpcavanaugh

      A cutlass is a broad-bladed sword, of the type favored by swashbuckling pirates.

      I have to disagree with you on Valiant and Dart – I love those names.

      New nomination for worst name ever: the Studebaker Dictator that came out in the 1930s. Now THAT was a bad name.

    • 0 avatar
      Morea

      Canyonero

      “Can you name the truck with four wheel drive,
      smells like a steak, and seats thirty-five..

      Canyonero! Canyonero!

      Well, it goes real slow with the hammer down,
      It’s the country-fried truck endorsed by a clown!

      Canyonero! (Yah!) Canyonero!
      [Krusty:] Hey Hey

      The Federal Highway comission has ruled the
      Canyonero unsafe for highway or city driving.

      Canyonero!

      12 yards long, 2 lanes wide,
      65 tons of American Pride!

      Canyonero! Canyonero!

      Top of the line in utility sports,
      Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!

      Canyonero! Canyonero! (Yah!)

      She blinds everybody with her super high beams,
      She’s a squirrel crushing, deer smacking, driving machine!

      Canyonero!-oh woah, Canyonero! (Yah!)

      Drive Canyonero!

      Woah Canyonero!

      Woah!”

  • avatar
    redav

    I’m a sucker for jokes/pranks in this area.

    One of my favorites is the Mazda Pi
    http://www.mazdapedia.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/mmmmpi-mazda-3.jpg
    (I have yet to see a Mazda Euler’s Number, though)

    I’ve been thinking of buying a Focus, and if I got the Titanium trim, I’d debadge the “titanium” and replace it with a custom badge of the periodic table entry for Ti
    http://www.ivstandards.com/extras/pertable/images/solid/ti.gif

    Some other ideas:
    – Rebadge the car with its Japanese kanji / Chinese hanzi equivalent.
    – Rebadge a car so it’s named after a Godzilla monster–especially “Rodan.” I’d love to drive a “Rodan.”

  • avatar
    Lorenzo

    Somebody doesn’t like car models named after states? How about cities? Several brands are/were successful that were named after cities: Plymouth, Cadillac, Pontiac, Oakland. I remember an article that found that none of the brands were popular in the cities they were named after. Maybe model names would do better. Anyway, Poughkeepsie, Oshkosh, and Cucamonga are still up for grabs. I would love to say I drive a Cucamonga!

    • 0 avatar
      cdotson

      No, Oshkosh is taken. Not by an automobile manufacturer per se, but they make medium/heavy trucks primarily for military use, but also civilian and commercial users.

      http://www.oshkoshcorporation.com

      Cadillac and Pontiac were named after people, as were the cities that bear those names. Plymouth was named after the ship, as their logo once included a sailing vessel.

      And you’re forgetting to mention the other geography-related names: Tahoe, Yukon, Sierra, Denali, Durango, Tacoma, Tundra, Santa Fe, Rio, Sorento (town in IL), Aspen, Daytona, Monaco…the list can and does go on and on.

      • 0 avatar
        Dynasty

        Tacoma is a city. Named after the Indian Chief Tahoma. There used to be a Mt Tahoma, now named Mt Rainier. Which inspired the naming of the Buick Rainier, And of course the Mercury Mountaineer, which was a brand named after a planet.

  • avatar
    Bimmer

    VW Passat. In Russian means ‘to take a piss’.

  • avatar

    Not to mention the Studebaker Dictator; Hyundai Scoupe; Mitsubishi Cordia; Subaru (Oedipus) WRX; the Japan-only Isuzu Light Dump; Acura Vigor; and Datsun Honey Bee.


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