Ward's Ten Best Engines, Three Worst Sentences

Every year, Ward’s names their “10 Best Engines” in a press release dripping with hyperbole and breathless praise. I’m often a bit mystified by their choices — the fragile, sludgy 1.8T VW? The 3.8L Nissan VR, which according to a race-engine-building friend of mine occasionally shows up with the shims on backwards, and which bore-walks under boost? The Cadillac Northstar V8??? — but the nice people at Ward’s have somehow figured out a way to make a buck creating the list and we shouldn’t begrudge them that.

Click the jump for the Ten Best Engines — and a special TTAC Bonus, the Three Worst Sentences Of The Press Release.

• 3.0L TFSI Supercharged DOHC V-6 (Audi S4)
• 3.0L N55 Turbocharged DOHC I-6 (BMW 335i)
• 1.6L Turbocharged DOHC I-4 (Mini Cooper S)
• 3.6L Pentastar DOHC V-6 (Dodge Avenger)
• 5.0L DOHC V-8 (Ford Mustang GT)
• 1.4L DOHC I-4/111kW Drive Motor (Chevrolet Volt)
• 5.0L Tau DOHC V-8 (Hyundai Genesis)
• 80kW AC Synchronous Electric Motor (Nissan Leaf)
• 2.0L DOHC I-4 Turbodiesel (Volkswagen Jetta TDI)
• 3.0L Turbocharged DOHC I-6 (Volvo S60)

And now, the Three Worst Sentences:

• Or Something Else, In Those Japanese Videos You Told Your Mom Belonged To Your Friend: “The effect is all-consuming, washing over the driver like waves on a beach.”
• Notions Of Turbo Lag Are Now Just Ninety Percent As Scary, Thanks To BMW: “For 2011, the N55 I-6 in the 335i replaces the two compressors with a single twin-scroll turbocharger that saves weight, improves throttle response, boosts fuel efficiency (15% over the N54) and reduces friction, while decimating the notion of turbo lag.”
• Our Favorite Inaccurate Noise Comparison, “UNDERWATER NUCLEAR SUBMARINE MICROPHONES LISTENING TO SHRIMP CHEWING ON FOOD AT 100 METERS DISTANCE”, Was Temporarily Unavailable Due To Use Elsewhere In A Decibel Chart: (Pentastar V6) “At idle, it is as quiet as a whisper.”

And now, the TTAC Bonus We Didn’t Even Mention In The Headline: Ward’s Best Sentence For 2010! Drum roll please:

• Until You Understand It, You Won’t Realize It’s Just A Glorified Hybrid: (Chevy Volt) “Some consider it a glorified hybrid while others just don’t understand it.”