By on January 10, 2010

let's cross the street, kids

I’ll wrap up Van Sunday with this collection of vans that fit the stereotype of the kind of vehicle you warn children about. Why? because I have a compulsion (no, not that kind) to document all the old vehicles in Eugene, no matter what they are. Maybe these are of limited interest today, but who knows; fifty or a hundred years from now they’ll be a time capsule. Right! Actually, these snub-nose Econolines are getting pretty rare. More unhealthy vans:

CC 27 029 800

This Chevy looks like a short-wheelbase model that was once in the employ of the phone company, given the faded paint scheme.

CC 27 062 800

And finally, the other extreme of the Big Three’s van size offering, the Dodge Maxi Van. Wasn’t that van-tastic?

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22 Comments on “CC Van Sunday Finale: Sleazy Old Camper Vans...”


  • avatar
    Dartster

    Great pics but was there any candy inside?

  • avatar
    RayH

    The only thing missing is a “FREE CANDY” sign on the side of any of the vans.

  • avatar
    Juniper

    CC rocks
    You are the Van!!!

  • avatar
    theflyersfan

    Glad to see that we have the vans that “Dateline NBC” looks for with their hidden cameras!
    On the back, there are two bumper stickers:
    “Don’t Laugh…Your Daughter is Back Here” and “If this van’s a’rockin’, don’t come a’knockin!”

    In the cargo area:
    Burned out track lighting
    Broken disco ball
    Mattress with odd and disturbing stains
    Clothes left behind that needs burning before the police arrive
    Plywood to cover the hole in the floor

    All this van needs is a faded “western” mural and it’s perfect! (and creepy)

  • avatar
    AdamYYZ

    We have modern day Ford cargo vans at work for going to job sites. They drive really bad. I would hate to drive any great distance in one. I can only imagine driving cross country in one of these abominable jalopys.

  • avatar
    rnc

    “would you like to see my boxed shaped van little girl, I have oh so many candies”

    Yuppers, I’ve advised my step-daughter to avoid such vehicles

  • avatar
    rnc

    Now my boss still has his 70’s van, track lighting, shag carpet, quadraphonic sound system (great for pre-wall floyd if your in the right state of mind) and all the other goodies that made modified vans the dream car of 70’s youth.

  • avatar

    Old vans being molester-mobiles is a time-honored, if rather dated, stereotype.

    All the little kids nowadays know that the real pervs drive around in 5 series BMWs.

  • avatar
    Robert.Walter

    Can’t see one of those high roof Fords without hearing Raymond Burr: “Ed, get the van.”

  • avatar
    obbop

    The future’s affordable housing for a growing percentage of the USA population, I fear.
    There’s class warfare, all right, Mr. (Warren) Buffett said, but it’s my class, the rich class, that’s making war, and we’re winning.
     

  • avatar
    thebanana

    SNL summed up the fear of vans perfectly:
    http://blip.tv/file/606719
     

  • avatar
    NickR

    No need for a sex offender registry with these around.
    Somehow I think these are all owned by people who work as roustabouts at those travelling carnivals.  And all that implies.

  • avatar
    jconli1

    Camper vans aren’t for child molesters… they’re for the mobile homeless – a phenomenon I’d never seen even in the slummiest of east coast neighborhoods. Seattle’s clogged with the things. You’re too poor or too much a burnt out hippie to “be a part of the system”, but you can afford gasoline for a 35 year old, 7mpg rolling turd?
     
    Neighborhoods here are crammed full of those firetraps – usually packed to the gills with all sorts of hoarded nonsense, often running jury rigged generators into the night. The police just push them around from place to place every few weeks, nothing is ever really done about them, so the numbers keep increasing.
    Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for mental health care and job training programs – I know its hard times for people… but the west coast is full of helpful programs, provided at high cost to taxpayers, and yet these trashed old vans just keep coming.
     
    Once some motorcycle tires and a jerry can were stolen from my back yard, found them all next to a parked camper van down the street. A year later, my home was broken into and cleaned out a few months back, and the detectives were positive it was 2 van dweller’s they’d been watching (loosely) a few blocks away. The sight of those old piles of crap doesn’t make me scared for kids, or sad for humanity… it just makes me angry.

    • 0 avatar
      WildBill

      Liberal policies toward the homeless get you these problems. Wouldn’t be stood for here, but we are a bit more conservative in general. Surely there is some law that can get them removed? Maybe not.

      AdamYYZ, my ’89 Ford Club Wagon was a joy to drive vs. a friends later model van. They lost something when they changed them. We took many a trip from Ohio to New England with no discomfort. I agree that I couldn’t stand those new ones in comparison.

    • 0 avatar
      Paul Niedermeyer

      You’re right, of course. I was just evoking a silly old stereotype. We obviously have the same problem here. In certain neighborhoods, they just collect like driftwood.

    • 0 avatar
      jconli1

      all that said, the vans themselves are great. My mom’s main work truck for her antique business was a 1978 Chevy C20 Nomad. It soldiered on for just shy of 400k miles before being totalled on the top span of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge (inattentive trucker rear ended her in stop and go beach traffic)

      Amazing truck.

  • avatar
    krazykarguy

    Why are these vans always a rotten shade of seafoam green, harvest gold, or beige???

  • avatar
    celebrity208

    I use a 1988 G30 Sport van (bought from the DC METRO for $1250 in 2000) to tow my boat.  It looks sad, but runs great.  When there is a problem it’s always easy to fix or cheap to have fixed.  With X78,000 mi (X being 0, 1, 2, 3, etc.) I’ve definitely gotten my money’s worth.  I’m actually in the market for a replacement (wife is getting embarrassed with it in the driveway) and I’m looking at regular wheelbase (135″) ’96-’02 GM 3500 passenger vans.  You can’t beat the towing capacity, storage/carrying capacity, and value of these beasts.

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