Is Bling Still King?

Robert Farago
by Robert Farago

I've been wondering about the future of urban car culture for some time. How can its adherents sustain interest in an automotive genre based almost entirely on big wheels, retrofitted TV's, new upholstery and presidential window tint? Extreme examples are still eye magnets, but they're beginning to seem a bit… limited. Sure, car nuts of all stripes are capable of endlessly obsessing over the smallest details– body colored engine braces, taillight covers, tire treads, miniscule horsepower upgrades, etc. But there's only so much you can do to make a car look like a pimpmobile. In general, and in specific, it's been done.

There are unmistakable signs that the urban car culture is weakening. Scan the formerly blingtastic celebrity car mags and you'll find that a lot of famous faces are leaving their supercars well enough alone. Whether this restraint reflects the celebs' assimilation into America's conservative elite, or a simple case of depreciation appreciation, it deprives street car culture of some its most distinguished proponents. As a celebrity-fuelled movement– unlike ground-up car cults like the Japanese tuner scene– the gangsta look loses momentum every time a Foxy Brown poses next to a stock Lamborghini or Bentley.

You can also clock the flagging interest in bling mods on TV. Funkmaster Flex once earned his living by creating extravagant wheel, ICE and fabric alterations for celebrities' contemporary SUV's. These days, his crew applies much of their transformative powers to older American metal, lightening the color palate away from ghetto-fabulous black, delving into the mechanical minutia and leaving the Playstation in the playroom. Some of the finished machines wouldn't look out of place at a muscle car concours.

MTV's "Pimp My Ride" has also abandoned hard core gangsta chic. A recent edition transformed an old VW bus into a clean, contemporary-looking surfer's wet dream. Considering the number of blingless gizmo grafts– built-in pool tables, pop-up signs, toasters, etc. — the producers could justifiably change the show's name to "Sharper Image my Ride". Urban car culture simply couldn't offer a large enough palate for TV's insatiable maw.

Music videos also reflect the fact that the spinner culture has spun out. The big guns have moved on; Rapper 50 Cent's "Candy Shop" features a stock Saleen S7. Granted, the soft core promotion showed the half-dollar dude sleeping in a black-hole-black 645Ci with wafer thin tires and aftermarket wheels, but it wasn't his dream ride. In any case, music videos now showcase exotic whips that were born wild, rather than made that way.

DUB is the exception that proves the rule. The magazine still soldiers away, resolutely Old School, preaching the gospel of mesh grills, suede headliners and 22" wheels (double Dubs). And why not? Bling's the thing that makes their cash register ring. The company is busy reaping the financial rewards of bringing branded black automotive culture to the, dare I say it, white masses. Predictable as it is in every detail, the DUB Edition™ Dodge Charger RT will be a sure-fire hit amongst mainstreamers, who trust the "experts'" taste and prefer fully warranted, turnkey bling.

Of course, OEM success is a sure sign that bling is a dead trend stunting. What good is looking like a gangsta if the yuppie next to you looks like one too? Lest we forget, automakers from Chrysler (300C, Charger) to Mercedes (CLS500) to GM (HHR) are selling more and more cars with built-in bling. The wilder the design, the greater the degree of pre-existing product "individuality", the lesser the need for ANY modification, urban or otherwise. It would be hard to imagine a DUB edition Chevrolet SSR.

Like the rest of the blingmeisters, DUB ain't dumb. They know their days are numbered. Hence, there's a subtle shift in the company's emphasis. The DUB edition Chrysler 300C package includes a sports exhaust and a power-boosting chromed air intake. Like the rest of the urban car culture, the magazine is searching for a way to take the bling ethos in a new direction.

Mind you, it's highly unlikely that performance is the new black. Despite the urban car culture's predilection for Ferraris, Lamborghinis, AMG Mercs and other high velocity metal, driving the cars fast is entirely beside the point. It's all about slow-speed status projection, or, to use the old-fashioned term, cruising. Which leaves the scene with… what? BIGGER wheels? MORE mini-TV's? Diamond-encrusted steering wheels? Sterling silver speedometers?

Well, yes. In the long run, urban car culture will either gradually disappear into the wider car scene, as the mainstream audience loses interest, or mutate into something new and extravagant. My money is on the latter. Now that minority buyers have found an automotive design language of their own, it's only a matter of time before they re-invent and re-invigorate it. The sheer bravado of bling, its irresistible energy, can not, WILL not be denied.

Robert Farago
Robert Farago

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  • Fahrvergnugen cannot remember the last time i cared about a new bmw.
  • Analoggrotto More useless articles.
  • Spamvw Did clears to my '02 Jetta front markers in '02. Had to change the lamps to Amber. Looked a lot better on the grey wagon.I'm guessing smoked is illegal as it won't reflect anymore. But don't say anything about my E-codes, and I won't say anything about your smoked markers.
  • Theflyersfan OK, I'm going to stretch the words "positive change" to the breaking point here, but there might be some positive change going on with the beaver grille here. This picture was at Car and Driver. You'll notice that the grille now dives into a larger lower air intake instead of really standing out in a sea of plastic. In darker colors like this blue, it somewhat conceals the absolute obscene amount of real estate this unneeded monstrosity of a failed styling attempt takes up. The Euro front plate might be hiding some sins as well. You be the judge.
  • Theflyersfan I know given the body style they'll sell dozens, but for those of us who grew up wanting a nice Prelude Si with 4WS but our student budgets said no way, it'd be interesting to see if Honda can persuade GenX-ers to open their wallets for one. Civic Type-R powertrain in a coupe body style? Mild hybrid if they have to? The holy grail will still be if Honda gives the ultimate middle finger towards all things EV and hybrid, hides a few engineers in the basement away from spy cameras and leaks, comes up with a limited run of 9,000 rpm engines and gives us the last gasp of the S2000 once again. A send off to remind us of when once they screamed before everything sounds like a whirring appliance.
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