India’s Economic Times can’t believe it: “Porn baron Larry Flynt says that the US Government should help rejuvenate the industry, which has been bearing the brunt of the ongoing global economic crisis, with a financial assistance of five billion dollars. The Hustler magazine founder has even joined forces with ‘Girls Gone Wild’ video series’ creator Joe Francis to approach Congress so as to sustain the same kind of financial aid as was recently approved for automakers.”
A Bollywood fantasy? No, says Xbiz Newswire, the adult entertainment industry news authority. Xbiz says Flint and Francis are serious. Or at least seriously looking for headlines. Xbiz talked to Larry Flint’s flak Owen Moogan, who made a compelling case: “With the Big Three automakers asking for assistance, and with banks asking for assistance, we thought, ‘Why not us?’ The adult industry is another great American business entity. We represent the all-American pursuit of sexual gratification.”
Reuters reports that Adult industry leaders Flynt and Francis sent a joint request to Congress asking for $5 billion in federal assistance, “Just to see us through hard times,” Francis said. “Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses, we feel we deserve the same consideration.”
Flynt said the recession has deeply affected the adult industry because “people are too depressed to be sexually active. This is a very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such, but they cannot do without sex. It’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly.” Congress better hustle, then. Depression diminishes sexual appetite. Less babies are born. Less people. Less buyers. Less cars.
33 Comments on “Bailout Watch 324: U.S. Porn Industry Wants A Suckle (Car Reference at End of Post)...”
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They’ll probably offshore those jobs too, once they start asking for lifetime employment guarantees in the porn industry. Brrrr!
The Japanese are definitely competitive in this industry too. There’s so much content out there, why would the consumer even pay?
Haha good luck with that. I am sure America will be back on its feet within 16-20 years.
So not only will I get a free Malibu in my driveway, it comes with a Malibu Barbie? SWEET!
The Japanese are definitely competitive in this industry too.
Hah! They have the strategic parts pixelated. I have checked myself in the name of research. I wouldn’t call that competitive. But maybe their export versions are without the annoying mosaic …. I wouldn’t know that, I do my research at the source.
WOW! I want to be a shareholder, do we get a test drive? Cash rebates with a purchase? Where does she keep that cup holder?
Does this mean the government will start handing out vouchers for a free hummer ?.
Obviously this is satirical theater. Larry Flint is famous for it. Did you know he has a standing $1m bounty for scandalous info on Senators and Congressman? A true American.
Why is this posted on TTAC? Come on now, aside from the correlation that both industries are suffering, there is no relative info here that should warrant a post.
Aside from the obvious, to set up the many, many jokes regarding Hummers…Bah Zing!
Could I apply for the job of Porn Czar?
@Jeff: It’s posted so that we can show gratuitous half nudity.
“Hah! They have the strategic parts pixelated. I have checked myself in the name of research. I wouldn’t call that competitive. But maybe their export versions are without the annoying mosaic …. I wouldn’t know that, I do my research at the source.”
There is a loop hole in the Japanese Law that studios get around. Usually they do the filming and production in another country like Thailand. There is plenty of mosiac free J-porn out there.
The question is, are they actually serious about this? Or this is clever satire of the whole bailout mess going on, either way it gets them great publicity
I personally think it would be hilarious to see the porn industry in Washington Lobbying congress for a bailout.
This one is kind of a stretch, but whatever.
More importantly, if you’re going to post a photo of “gratuitous half nudity,” please find one without Larry Flynt in it. He’s got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
So Larry Flynt is doing this purely for publicity, and you fell for it.
Wow…stick that under the “Whiskey Tango Foxtrot” file.
If people were wary of bailing out banks and the auto industry, they’ll be lighting up torches if Congress even considers this.
You said “tit”.
So Larry Flynt is doing this purely for publicity, and you fell for it.
Of course he’s doing it for publicity, he’s Larry Flynt. Try to think of this as a low-moral version of Swift’s A Modest Proposal: it’s plausible enough to be fallen for, yet absurd enough that it pokes a finger in the eye of those who have already cried for money.
I agree with Jeff.
This post has no place on TTAC. It’s just for publicity and you fell into it.
Mind you, it is interesting seeing Larry Flynt asking Uncle Sam for a helping hand……job!
Sorry! I couldn’t resist it! :O)
Sorry! I couldn’t resist it! :O)
Thus further illustrating why the story was posted in the first place.
Carry on, TTAC. A little tangent never hurt anyone (well, unless it was inserted somewhere it didn’t belong).
That’s awesome, I hope they get it.
Socialized porn has a nice ring to it.
The porn industry has done a lot to advance technology: VHS, DVD, pay per view, the internet, search engines, broadband, streaming video; all porno innovations.
There’s been a trend lately at TTAC for the publishing of pictures of semi-naked women. I agree with several other B&B comments that it must be a slow day in the automotive news world. In other words, what the hell does this have to do with automobiles?
Well the porn industry (like the unions) is just looking for payback for all of their support from the Democrats.
Katie,
Well played.
Reuters reports that Adult industry leaders Flynt and Francis sent a joint request to Congress asking for $5 billion in federal assistance, “Just to see us through hard times,” Francis said.
If what Flynt and Francis say are true, then isn’t the adult industry in “soft” times rather than hard times? :O
The photo is indeed appropriate; after all, its subject is Larry Flynt, who, like all of us, is really devoted to his set of wheels.
Whoa! I could have sworn I was on The Truth About Cars. Must have hit the wrong link.
Even with such a flacid economy, I wouldn’t think the porn industry would go down.
I’d rather my tax dollars went to support a bunch of beautiful women making a product I would buy, than giving it to a bunch of union guys making a product I wouldn’t buy.
They’re both industries that have been damaged by underpaid amateur labor (whether overseas or domestic).
Is Senator
Tappy McWideStanceLarry Craig going to insist upon wage concessions from workers in theMinneapolis Airport bathroom‘adult entertainment’ industry?…:-D…Not only is this whole subject funny, how are we to talk about the bail out subject without acknowledging this industry’s request? Admit it, as soon as you say yes to the car guys, and no to the porn guys, you just started down a road that will end in pain for everyone. Even if it takes decades, it WILL end badly.
Stop the destruction of what our country really is – a set of ideals – not a bunch of car companies.
This is one of the reasons why many were opposed to the Big Three bailout: they thought that if the Big Three got bailed out, then every business from every industry is going to be asking for one. Those bastards were right on the money…..
The domestic car and porn businesses have a lot in common. The products are mostly crap, the same bits appear in countless movies, the movies are marketed under umpteen brand names, and somebody gets screwed in the end.
Okay, this is just too funny. It’s exactly what so many of us have warned about, but with all of the quips above, I’m laughing so hard I can’t think of anything clever to say!
Nope, thanks to the net, porn of all stripes is free and as close as any search engine.
Better for you guys when porn was sold in plain brown wrappers, by guys who charged a lot for it. It was something you could not get easily anywhere else. Playboy pushed it sorta into the mainstream, and Hugh is still an icon.
Kinda like when detroit had a 50% market share. Today you can go elsewhere, it’s a lot cheaper, and the quality is better.
The old school porn industry is JUST like the old school 2.3 makers. An old product, made shoddily, sold at high prices to an otherwise captive audience.
Except that world is gone, along with corporate loyalty, defined benefit pensions and any concept that those running things have a clue.