For accountants, there are two certainties: golf and taxes. Together, both are tedious enough to make me want death. Unfortunately, I knew I’d be hearing a lot about both of these moribund subjects at our firm golf tournament. I was in the parking lot that morning, praying to the heavens for divine intervention when I heard my boss’ 1976 Corvette growling and lazily pulling up. As soon as I saw the ‘Vette, I decided to cash in the goodwill I’d earned by working 300 hours of overtime between November and March. “Fifteen minutes – no more,” he said. Score.
As we sat down for the drive, my boss smiled. He knew what was coming. I turned the ignition; the car sputtered lamely. “This always happens when I drive cars that are older than me,” I said. I primed it with a flick of the gas and the 305 V8 rumbled to life. T-Top off, we hit the country roads near the course.
The car’s age was immediately apparent. The brakes were spongy and non-linear, the pedal travel was maddening and the stock automatic only had three speeds. The car’s handling managed to somehow both be soft, yet twitchy over destitute farm roads. By far the worst thing was the skinny steering wheel. Though it was relatively linear, the steering offered about 20 degrees of play before engaging in earnest, and when it did, it gave me an upper body workout worthy of P90X. Gripping the skinny tiller, and then making the Herculean effort to rotate it, I wondered if power steering should trump sliced bread as the world’s greatest invention.
I struggled to find a basis for comparison. The Corvette was so raw, so unrefined, so different from anything I’d driven. Though it was a “luxury” car in its day, I could never treat it as such. Every change of direction had to be planned in advance, lest the understeer or snap oversteer take over with such non-linear brakes. Every turn of the steering required a rest until the next. This thing wasn’t even close to a luxury car, it was a motorcycle on four wheels. Even the straight pipes and their thunderous burble reminded me of a bike.
As we bombed it down the country roads, I wasn’t taken back to a scene from Bullit, or 2 Fast Too Furious. The only thing I could think of was the opening scene in Lawrence of Arabia. The one where Peter O’Toole pushes his bike to the limit, swallowing the country road ahead of him, approaching death so closely just to see if he could still feel alive.
“This is all really cheesy,” I said to my boss. “Yeah, but it’s a kind of cheesy I like,” he replied.
It all felt so ancient, belonging to a time when Americans loved the open road. Before drivers learned to delegate 90 percent of a car’s decisions to a computer. A time when cars were so fun, and new, and cool, and awesome that just hitting a piece of strip was an event in and of itself. And the Stingtay was near the top of the pantheon, as far as perfect cars to devour the Interstate: more adventurous and accessible than a Cadillac of the same vintage, and more athletic than a Chevy Impala.
As cars became more insular, and the “Sunday drive” became a thing of the past, they stopped making Vettes like this one. But this Vette didn’t just take me through country roads, it brought me back to 1976. The 305 burbled, the sun shone and the road lay ahead of us. No speed traps, no ABS, no traction control. Just the Vette, my scared shitless Boss and I. A rare moment of automotive nirvana.
In the end, it didn’t really matter that the 305 could barely manage to produce wheelspin without power braking. And I hardly cared that the yellow Stinger was ridiculously phallic (it could probably arouse Bob Dole from the dead). Or that the seats were so old and cracked and offered so little lumbar support that I regretted not bringing my chiro along. Nope, none of that mattered.
Not having been alive when it rolled off the line, it was clear I couldn’t evaluate the Vette against its peers. All I knew was that I loved it. Was it because it was so different than the type of cars I grew up in, or was it because it was a bona fide good car? Out here on these country roads, as the miles piled up, the engine roared and I felt strangely at peace with myself, I’m not sure the answer really mattered.
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210 bhp and a 3-speed slush box? 0-60 in 8.1 seconds.
It could get its doors blow off by an Avalon.
Was it the stock engine block? I thought the 1976 only came with the 350 and the 305 wasn’t offered until 1980 or something.
I don’t think any enthusiast wants to go back to 1976. 1966 maybe.
Now that’s the kind of automotive writing I like. Thanks.
These cars are best done with modified engines. The look of the car is great, the mechanical underpinnings not so much.
A friend owns a 79 with a 350 that needs valve guide seals, a new interior and definitely a suspension work over. The gas gauge bounces wildly as you drive, the automatic shifts too hard thanks to a shift kit, the steering is not too bad although the brakes are Fred Flintstone quality. The radio doesn’t work and the headlights pop up when they feel like it.
What you notice when driving is the two fender humps framing the road. The super low seat position puts you down at go kart level and gives a perspective no other car at the time had. The long front short rear means turns are really events to be experienced.
He loves the car and plans to hop it up. There is something about a ‘vette that can’t be beat.
I have it in the back of my mind to resto-mod a C3 Corvette. When I’ll have the money to do such a thing is anyone’s guess. I’d like to drop in an LS1 or LS6, newer 6-speed tranny, and a suspension that approximates “sport.” Top it off with period-style wheels (+1 or +2 over stock) and metallic paint.
Turns out alot of these “fast” cars from yester-year weren’t that fast after all. But who cares… I was only 5 years old when this car came out and it still the BEST looking ‘Vette EVER! Sexy curves, oversized fenders, deep dish mag wheels, turned up tail, pointy front end, side scoop, hood bulge – man this car has it ALL, even the door handle screams “cool”.
Those C3 Vettes are hands down the sexiest cars GM ever made, possibly even the most beautiful car anyone ever made. If only it were practical to take that body and put modern hardware underneath it…
Thanks for a great write-up. I’ve never driven a Corvette but you could have been describing my old AMX. I miss that thing… leaking gaskets and all.
They were all 350’s with 8.5 to 1 compression. Big yawn
These cars are just asking for an update under the hood. Most are cheap although paint and body can get real expensive.
Some things are better left to memories and nostalgia. This car just wasn’t that good. Typical GM 70’s shoddy build quality. Old design and no power. Nothing innovative.
Even the 60s muscle cars aren’t really as fast as folks remember. 14 second 1/4 miles were fast back in the day. Today, your mom can break a 14 second 1/4 in her Camry while applying makeup and talking on the phone.
What great writing … thanks!
My father, God rest his soul, bought one of these new. The ‘76 was really the low water mark of Corvettes and, of course, it was a piece of shit, right down to the Vega GT steering wheel.
But my father loved it and therefore so did I. He was 53 and bought it for the same reason most other people did then — my folks had just gotten divorced and as bad as the ‘Vette drove by today’s standards, it was a huge improvement over the Caprice Estate Wagon he dumped. And it got him his second wife, with whom he was much happier.
I miss that stupid car.
Damn; you beat me to it. I have a ‘74 Corvette Curbside Classic, yellow too, but not nearly as “pretty” as this one.
A “luxury car”? That would have been the Monte Carlo, or such. The Corvette was never positioned as anything but America’s best shot at a sports car, even when it failed to deliver, like these.
The ‘76 Corvette came with two engines, L-48 at 180 net horespower and L-82 at 210. Early L-82’s had 9.0:1 compression ratio, I don’t know about a ‘76. Biggest differences were the heads and cam along with 4 bolt mains and forged (instead of cast) internal components. This one looks like a L-48 as it has no “L-82″ badge on the hood. The 305 was never put in a Corvette
The only thing worse than a ‘76 Corvette is a ‘75 Corvette and it is the worst. But if you have it and you enjoy it that’s all that really matters.
The thing about older cars, is that whilst they are not fast, and as many have pointed out, most modern appliances can outperform them, they feel fast.
The low seating, wind in the hair, minimal driver aids; driving at any speed is an experience.
Sometimes driving isn’t about going fast it’s about the overall experience.
I kind of liked the way these Vettes looked. I recently flirted with an 82 in bright red.
That being said, they sucked, in all honestly. Appalling build quality, dreadful performance and indifferent electrics. As a fun thing to have laying around it might be worth it for nostalgia…if you are nostalgic for the 70s. I am not.
Aside from the Camaro and Firebirds of the day, that car (in optional Gymkhana trimmings) was the performance King of the late 70s. You know, if it never did battle with anything older than 1973. Or anything newer than 1983. If you stick with that window of relevance, the Disco Vettes are pretty cool.
Make mine an ‘82 Collectors Edition with a 4-spd and an aftermarket tape player, so I can listen to Journey with the T-tops off and the wind in my hair.
“Make mine an ‘82 Collectors Edition with a 4-spd and an aftermarket tape player, so I can listen to Journey with the T-tops off and the wind in my hair.”
Sorry Sajeev, 1981 was the last year for the four speed. The ‘82 only had the Crossfire sorta fuel injection engine and a three speed automatic.
rpol 35: The 305 was never put in a Corvette
1980 Corvettes sold in CA came only with the 305.
rpol35 : Oops, that’s right…my mistake! But isn’t the automatic a 4-speed overdrive?
rpol35:
“The ‘82 only had the Crossfire sorta fuel injection engine and a three speed automatic.”
Blasphemy! I’ve never understood the desire to have a slushbox in a Corvette…or any car with sporting pretensions, for that matter. Though I must admit it doesn’t surprise me ’80s era GM would make such a boneheaded decision. Then again, it wouldn’t surprise me if GM made that kind of decision during any era. This is the same company that does the 1-2-4 lockout on modern ‘Vettes, aye?
Yeah, yeah about the modern automatics being better in both performance and fuel economy than their stick counterparts in most cars. But any so-called “driver’s car” deserves a driver behind the wheel. Not just someone merely keeps it between the ditches, but someone who appreciates– nay, savors the experience of making that car sing, gear changes and all.
I get a lot of satisfaction out of downshifting as I come down the off-ramp cruising into work. Especially on older motorcycles or in older cars, the sound and feel of the engine during this maneuver adds a little much-needed zest to my morning (and possibly saves my brakes from a little unnecessary heat.)
All but the most expensive, sporty autoboxes won’t do that for you. They’ll just let you glide in, forcing you to ride the brakes while you travel all the way down the ramp in relative silence. No heel-toe downshifting, no “hey hun, watch me go clutchless on this ramp,” nothing. Just mundanity.
Awesome review, Samir. Quit working so much overtime and drive more cars for us!
Samir Syed: But this Vette didn’t just take me through country roads, it brought me back to 1976. The 305 burbled, the sun shone and the road lay ahead of us. No speed traps, no ABS, no traction control.
In 1976, the 55 mph speed limit was in effect, and enforcement was quite strict in most states. Most Detroit V-8s were a mere shadow of themselves by that point. The Corvette was already looking clunky and outdated by that point – and it had another seven years to go with this basic body and chassis!
Definitely not the best of times, from an automotive enthusiast’s standpoint. Still loved the article.
How about a time-travel trip to before even I was born? (so to speak)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_h2HiquxWs
Yes, the Pontiac GTO was NOT the “original muscle car”. The 1956 Studebaker Golden Hawk was.
The massive (and I mean MASSIVE) Packard V8 shoe-horned into the very light Studebaker Hawk body.
352 cubic inches (instead of 185 for the six cylinder, or 259 for the Power Hawk, or 289 for the Sky Hawk). 4071 built. 275 hp (stock – this one has about 330).
The hottest 1956 Ford Thunderbird was only 225 hp (which was the only thing even remotely similar to the Stude – the Corvette was way more sports car and less boulevarder/cruiser).
Even so, the hottest 1956 Corvette? 225 hp.
The actual Studebaker built V8 didn’t lack power, however, as may be heard in this clip. Call it “symphony in Studebaker V8″ for gear-heads.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wx3WB39NYao&feature=related
These make the 1976 Corvette look positively modern, don’t they?
“yeah but it’s a kind of cheesy I like” That says it all. It also explains why Camaros are flying off the shelf.
The only thing that stops me from,dumping my equally cheesy Firebird for an C3 are the scary repair costs.
I owned a 76 Vette when it was new. Out of all the older Corvettes this era is IMO the least desirable to own. Why anyone would spend any money restoring one of these is beyond me. It doesn’t cost any more to restore any other vintage and there are many model years I view as much more desirable. These cars are best left forgotten which is probably why you see so few of them on the road.
“rpol35 : Oops, that’s right…my mistake! But isn’t the automatic a 4-speed overdrive?”
Sajeev: I’ll have to ask the B&B but I believe the 700R4 four speed automatic was introduced in ‘83. Anyone know for sure?
Paul Niedermeyer: “1980 Corvettes sold in CA came only with the 305.”
Paul:
I forgot that CA was a one state exception in some cases. Thanks.
“The ‘82 only had the Crossfire sorta fuel injection engine and a three speed automatic.”
“Banger: Blasphemy! I’ve never understood the desire to have a slushbox in a Corvette…or any car with sporting pretensions, for that matter. Though I must admit it doesn’t surprise me ’80s era GM would make such a boneheaded decision. Then again, it wouldn’t surprise me if GM made that kind of decision during any era. This is the same company that does the 1-2-4 lockout on modern ‘Vettes, aye?”
Banger:
Agree completely but that’s the way it was, it’s GM so go figure.
It’s a Corvette. It’s bright yellow. It has an open roof. It has that nice wasp-waisted body. Your boss could do a lot worse. I’d be happy to drive such a thing occiasionally.
mtymsi: “These cars are best left forgotten which is probably why you see so few of them on the road.”
Is it winter all year round where you are? I see these on the road all the time in the summer. Personally, I think they’re the most beautiful car ever built, which is why I just bought my second one.
For those interested, here’s a .pdf chart from a 1976 Car and Driver comparo between the Corvette L82, Dart Sport 360, Trans Am 455, C10 Silverado 454, and the Mustang II Cobra.
1976 American performance cars
For people that don’t want to click (although I recommend it), the Corvette was a 3-spd auto. Its 0-60 was 7.1. Its 1/4 mile time was 15.3 @ 91.9mph. Top speed was 124.5mph. Turning circle was 37ft.
Another interesting note is that the 3820lb Trans Am with rear drum brakes managed a 70-0 distance of 175ft. The 2010 Camaro LT weighs 3807lbs, has four wheel disks, and goes 70-0 in 173ft.
ajla:
“Another interesting note is that the 3820lb Trans Am with rear drum brakes managed a 70-0 distance of 175ft. The 2010 Camaro LT weighs 3807lbs, has four wheel disks, and goes 70-0 in 173ft.”
Excellent data dive! And here I was marveling at the Silverado C10’s ability to put up the second-most expensive MSRP of the group while simultaneously putting up the worst numbers in most categories. But it did beat the Mustang Cobra II’s pathetic 105 mph top speed. I guess in the era of 55 mph national speed limits, Ford didn’t figure you should have any need to go twice the speed limit. For any reason. Ever.
That car just screams “coke whores” and “disco” to me. YMMV…
68-72 = most beautiful Corvette ever, after that, not so much! Lost the chrome and the power.
A 454 bored and stroked to 496cid will fit under the hood without modifications.
Great review.
I’ve never driven any ‘Vette, but I’ve always loved the C3, despite it’s obvious mechanical handicaps. My uncle has two 1973s (a black hardtop and an orange converible), and they are the greatest things ever. As a kid, I remember taking a ride in the convertible and loving every second of it.
Wonderfully written piece which explains why such cars are undesirable for most folks. With bad steering, bad brakes, jumpy suspension, who needs it? Sure it can give you some kicks for a while as can for instance watching Ron Jeremy, but in the end, it’s just porno, and not very good porno either.
I remember…back in the day. The guy across the street had one of these (dark blue), along with a hot looking Asian wife. I’d sit outside on the front porch sipping a cool one admiring the Vette parked in his driveway, and also keeping an eye on his wife mowing the lawn in her airbrushed shorts and halter top. I thought to myself, what a lucky guy–hot wife and hot car.
Unfortunately, once his wife got her green card she divorced him, taking his Corvette to boot. Now, after all these years and after reading the TTAC review I realize the guy was neither lucky in love, nor in motoring pleasure; and also that my envy was completely misplaced.
Mandated emissions killed whatever was left of GM’s vehicle’s high performance in 1973. Horsepower took a dive; In those days I worked in a GM parts dept. and these Corvettes were certainly good for (warranty) business. Door inner trim panels literally falling apart, but then the front suspension was still basically the 1953 Chev pass. design. GM had started the quality ‘downward spiral’, having just replaced the Vega with the shit-box Chevette in the mid 70’s.
This review hits on the key to a lot of great cars that the obsession with performance figures and electronic aids glosses over; not what they filter out but what they add to the sensation of driving.
The cars I’ve enjoyed the most always seem to be the rawest. In some ways they’ve been unrefined, but at least they didn’t have the character refined out of them.
Great find. One of the high points of TTAC is the occasional reference to ‘the good ‘ole days’ of Car and Driver, such as the recent sub-compact comparo of 1971.
In fact, I’ve been pining for years to see someone (anyone) post a classic article from the January, 1990 ‘Ten Best’ issue of C&D titled “The Ten Best Muscle Cars” which assembled what Patrick Bedard felt were the ten most viable factory contenders during the sixties/seventies street racing heyday.
For those interested, here’s the list:
‘66-’67 Plymouth/Dodge intermediate with 426 Hemi
‘68-’69 Plymouth/Dodge intermediate with 426 Hemi
‘70-’71 Plymouth/Dodge intermediate with 426 Hemi
‘66-’67 Chevy II SS327
‘66-’69 Chevelle SS396
‘68-’69 Chevy II Nova SS396
1969 Ford Torino Cobra 428
1969 Roadrunner/Super Bee 440 Six Pack
1970 Chevelle SS454
1969 Pontiac GTO
FWIW, the Hemi cars should be listed as a single entry, not three (IIRC, Bedard’s rationale for this was that the engineering changes in the Hemi justified listing them separately), as well as Hemi-powered cars being a relative rarity on the street back then (they were expensive and just didn’t build a whole lot of them).
Likewise, the GTO shouldn’t be on the list, either. They just weren’t that fast (particularly the 389-powered variety) compared to the others on the list. The performance level was right down there with stuff like 390 Fords.
This would free up spots to be able to add more omnipresent, fast cars like Chrysler’s great 340 Duster/Dart compact muscle cars, the Olds W-30 442 or Buick GSX, both of which finally got the 455 engine in 1970, or the Mustang Mach 1 428CJ.
Regardless, I’d still love to see the entire text of the article posted somewhere.
The only thing worse than a ‘76 Corvette is a ‘75 Corvette and it is the worst.
That is so true. My father bought a 75 and it was a total piece of crap. One of it’s more endearing characteristics was when it’s wipers would get slightly out of sync and hang up on each other. The passenger had to reach out and unstick them.
He bought a 4 speed Corolla at the same time and that quickly became his baby. A scratch on the Vette – no problem, but god forbid anything happening to that little Toyota.
In case anyone is confused, Bob Dole is not really dead. But I doubt even a canary yellow Corvette could have done anything for his presidential bid 20 years after this car was produced…
OK, here we go…
305 in CA in 1980 only is correct. L48/L82 specs are correct, though by ‘78 they were getting 220 horses out of the L82 and 6.6 sec 0-60 times. Not quite an L-88 from 10 years before but definitely respectable. And top of the heap at the time.
Corvettes have ALWAYS had automatics. The first one in ‘53 came with a Powerglide only. Keep in mind that the automatic transmission was a godsend to that generation. Clutches and shifters up to that point were heavy and crude. Automatics were the cutting edge of technology and luxury.
And the performance of a Turbo Hydra-matic Vette was very close to the four-speed with the same engine.
Yeah, a well-worn 33-year-old car is going to feel somewhat crappy. See if you can get your hands on a mint-condition example to get a true feel for how these cars drove and what they meant to car culture in their time.
But more than anything, please make sure you have your facts straight. A glaring inaccuracy like the wrong engine can kill an otherwise enjoyable read.
So these cars are great because they feel so raw, eh?
A few days ago, I drove a 16 year old, 200k mile Prizm. It had been hit and repainted several times. At 65mph, the front hood shook terribly. The rear bearing were intrusively loud. The bent front rims shook the steering wheel violently. The rear door window fell of its tracks so there was plenty of wind noise. The 15 minute ride felt like several hours. It was definitely raw, just like a 76 Vette would be.
The thing about the C3 Corvette, though, is that it was a little crude by the standards of 1968 or 1976, much less today. They were never very rigid, they were always cramped, noisy and hot, most of the seats sucked, and they tended to rattle. It was, in a very literal sense, the triumph of GM Styling over engineering.
As for the three-speed Turbo Hydramatic, it was a great improvement over previous generations, where the only available automatic was the two-speed Powerglide. (Corvette history buffs will recall that the original ‘53-’54 ‘Vettes came only with PeeGee.) By the standards of the time, the Turbo Hydro was world-class, which ought to tell you something.
Sajeev —
“Make mine an ‘82 Collectors Edition with a 4-spd and an aftermarket tape player, so I can listen to Journey with the T-tops off and the wind in my hair.”
How about an ‘80, with said T-tops and tape deck??? I just might know a guy, if you’re ever in Toronto
My brother had a modified ‘68 which I had the displeasure of driving a few times. The previous owner had put a built 454 in, but he switched it to a built 350 because with the unassisted steering it required a herculean effort to drive at low speeds with the big block weight over the front wheels. Worst thing aside from the atrocious build quality was the ergonomics… instead of raising the roofline to accommodate drivers over 6′, they just raked the seat to a pretty severe angle. Result was one funky driving position. Not sure if it got better in the 70’s.
On the plus side the vacuum operated pop-up headlights were entertaining, never knew what they were going to do.
Everything that came out of Detroit in the 1970’s was crap, even the Corvette.
In the 1980’s I was allowed to drive a 70’s vintage Vette for a short distance, it was a huge disappointment. It was like getting a shot at the homecoming queen, only to discover that she had crabs.