By Samir Syed
August 6, 2007 -
The American pickup truck wars have become a series of increasingly pitched battles. Even as the pickup market tanks, the main players have regrouped, refreshed and rejoined the fight. As we await the new Dodge Ram pickup, a major candidate for the "I coulda been a contender" award, questions must be asked. Does the current Ram have what it takes to hold the fort against the [ostensibly] reliable Toyota Tundra, the built-like-a-rock Chevy Silverado and the tough luxury Ford F-150? What battles will the new Dodge Ram have to win?
Dodge last refreshed the Ram's design back in '02. At the time, The Dodge Boys' sheetmetal sculptors did little more than give the existing design a huge shot of whatever made Barry Bonds into such a serious slugger. The resulting big rig ‘tude was a huge hit. Protruding tail-lights, endless chrome, two levels of hood bulges and a Freightliner snout gave the pickup what the Germans call "uberholprestige," or what Good Old Boys call "Get the **** out of my way."
While there's nothing particularly wrong with the Ram's current design– provided you eat nails for breakfast– one wonders how long Dodge can play the machismo card in a world increasing filled with PC hybrids and CUVs (castrated utility vehicles). Even if Dodge stays on message, how much louder can they shout? Other than flaring the bed's flat flanks with Audi Quattro wheel arches or fitting the Ram's roof with standard air horns and running lights, there's not much room for "improvement."
Inside, there's PLENTY of room for improvement. The Ram's expansive center stack is bogged down by the same nasty plastic and generic interior cues plaguing all Chrysler-family models– right down to that irritating radio with its counter-intuitive controls.
Comfort also takes a back seat– or not. The Quad Cab's rear seats' obvious malevolence towards the human form provides surreptitious encouragement for a Mega Cab upgrade. The front seats aren't much better; the thinly padded chairs are no friend to anyone who's spent the day loading and emptying the cargo bed.
Thankfully, the Quad Cab's forward compartment is large enough for a brace of small gladiators to engage in relatively unfettered combat. The center armrest is the crown jewel of the Ram's cabin (just ask Toyota). This feature, beloved of laptop-toting foremen, is unbelievably accommodating. Lids down, both my ThinkPad and widescreen Dell fit in the space at the same time. As Paris Hilton would say (if she were the dual-laptop type), that's hot.
Last year, Dodge redesigned the Ram's frame and suspension to improve the pickup's class-following ride and handling. Clearly, much work remains to be done. While the F-150 turns road imperfections into a delicate lumbar massage, the Ram sends all shocks straight through to its passengers, unfiltered. Unless the Ram is fully loaded with passengers and cargo, the bed jumps around like children trapped in what the English call a bouncy castle.
Still, the Ram's got soul where it matters. The SLT trim holsters the company's trusty 4.7-liter V8. With this mighty motor, the Ram leaps long lines of traffic in a single bound, or, alternatively, tows small garages without complaint. The highway is the Ram's happy place; whether fully loaded or as empty as Congress' promises of energy independence, the pickup doesn't break a sweat at 70 mph. And speaking of sucking-up natural resources from foreign climes, I clocked 11 mpg in mixed driving, towing and hauling nothing heavier than thin air.
Sadly, the Ram's five-speed transmission (fifth is for overdrive) isn't up to the task of channeling 300 ft.-lbs. of twist. Upshifts are as abrupt as the downshifts are fashionably late. After lurching into second gear a few times, I found myself checking the transfer case switch to see if I hadn't somehow dropped into 4WD-Lo.
When push comes to shove, the current Ram trails all its competitors in nearly every category. It burns more fuel, isn't nearly as comfortable and doesn't drive as well. So why does it still sell so well? Because the Ram's cachet has nothing to do with handling, utility, longevity or efficiency.
Every time I passed another Ram, the driver would nod, admitting membership in the cult of the Ram. Dodge's pickup is the poseur truck par excellence, right down to its [where the Hell do I find] E85 [and why in God's name would I want to get less mpg] badge on the tailgate.
If I cared about my spinal cord, I'd get an F-150. If I wanted my truck to last 362,000 miles, I'd get a Silverado. If I wanted to haul ass in a rolling pantomime of bling and bravado (and occasionally tow a boat), there's no question I'd get a Ram. In short, the Dodge Ram is the Cadillac Escalade of pick-ups. Word.
2 / 5 Stars | Dodge Ram 1500 rating summary and performance review
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POWERED
August 6th, 2007 at 8:12 am
And here was I thinking the Sclade EXT was the Sclade of pick-ups.
Anyway, I liked the design much more before the redesign, but it doesn’t matter. All of it’s competitors are better choices. And if the new one has that same stupid plastic that’s still applied in all the new chrysler products, which it probably will, the rest of it better be really, really good for it to be a legitimate contender.
And that IS considering pick-ups probably aren’t bought for their soft touch interior plastics…
The version with the viper-V10 used to be cool though, for a minute or 5. Until Michael Schumacher bought one…
August 6th, 2007 at 8:35 am
Bob Nardelli, your limo just arrived!
August 6th, 2007 at 8:48 am
The Ram is a Cars.com “best bet” and yet it trails all its competitors in nearly every category.
Hmmmm.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:48 am
Starlight,
Limo or hearse?
August 6th, 2007 at 9:05 am
Sadly, the advent of the original Freightliner design has changed each of the pickups, the Ram, the F150, the Silverado and the Tundra into a “…poseur truck par excellence.” A friend still drives a very durable and useful ‘71 F250 and next to any of these it looks like a toy. And when following that old Ford in a regular car, it seems to block out only half as much sky as any of the current offerings.
11 mpg as well. My friend’s F250 gets 12 or so whilst consuming dino fluid far less precisely than any modern truck. Now that’s progress.
August 6th, 2007 at 9:10 am
SherbornSean:
If the bed has a cap on it, then definitely hearse.
August 6th, 2007 at 9:12 am
In spite of the dubious interior quality, the guy on the second photo seems desperate to get inside (was that HIS car you stole for the review?).
Then again, this man might just have taken a close look inside and is now traumatized.
;-P
August 6th, 2007 at 9:26 am
Having driven a couple of Dodge pickups with the 4.7L, I’m not sure I’d call it a “mighty motor” - perhaps “barely adequate motor” would be a better term to use. 235hp sounds good until you match it with a 5,200+ pound curb weight…and then imagine using the truck to haul a load or pull a trailer.
Plus, the 11mpg figure seems awfully low - while Dodges aren’t known for good mileage, that’s even lower than most owners are getting with the larger 5.7L (which I refuse to call a Hemi). I would expect that combination to get closer to 14 or 15mpg…not great, but fairly typical for that type of truck.
I’ll agree that the Dodge is probably the worst full-size pickup on the market - which is why they’re offering $6,000 rebates and selling them for $10,000+ off the sticker price. Problem is, even at the lower price they’re still no bargain.
I do wonder about the new lifetime powertrain warranty, though…with the current rebates you can pick up a base-model truck for about $15K, and with the new warranty that might be a good deal for contractors and those who put a lot of miles on their vehicles. Not that I’d want to drive one for 300,000 miles, but it might make some sense from a financial standpoint.
Edited to add: I just checked a couple of the Dodge pickup forums, and there are a couple owners out there getting similar mileage - 11mpg or so with the 4.7L V8. Wow…that is amazingly horrible mileage for an unloaded half-ton with the smaller V8. That’s actually worse mileage than I got with my crew-cab 1-ton 4×4 Ford with the 6.8L V10 - and it weighed about 7,000 pounds empty. No wonder they put a $6,000 rebate on them…you’d need it just to pay for the gas!
August 6th, 2007 at 10:06 am
If Dodge wanted to disrupt the full-size pickup truck market, they’d drop a 6-cylinder turbodiesel under the hood that can match the 4.7L’s 300ft-lbs with 30% better economy (is 20mpg too much to ask?) and greatly improved longevity. Too bad it’s too late to get their hands on MB’s 3.0-liter.
Make this the standard engine (except in California and its posse of states that mindlessly follow her lead on environmental policy) for trucks starting under $25,000 and I think they would achieve through bold engineering what they achieved by bold design in 1994 (i.e. a quadrupling of sales from ’93 to‘99).
August 6th, 2007 at 10:18 am
Interesting how Cerberus just hired a disgraced executive with absolutely nothing to lose to lead the company in this new era. Very interesting indeed.